Mitch Kralinger

As someone who works in the field of marine biology, sometimes people ask me about sea level rise, because that's a scary thing you hear about. And I have to say, I'm not really all that worried about our ocean levels, like, rising up. Because for me, I just see that as job growth, you know? Like, I'm just getting more to explore.

My career is growing at an alarming rate of a quarter inch a year, which, to put that into perspective, that's the same rate that my hair is falling out. So if you see me in like a year from now, now you can look at the top of my head and then decide if you still really want to invest in that oceanfront property.

One of my favorite facts about sea turtles is that their, one of my favorite facts about sea turtles is that their sex is determined by the temperature of their nest. So if the sand is really warm, then they develop as females, and if the sand is cold, they develop as males. Because even in the world of sea turtles, males and females cannot agree on what, did I go over time?

Even in the world of sea turtles, males and females cannot agree on what temperature the thermostat should be set to. All right. Jesus fucking Christ.

What's that?

Oh, yeah, that's what I like to talk about. That's why I was worried.

What the fuck was that? Like 60% of it. Why? Because it's what I do. I'm passionate about the sea, you know?

So I'm an aquarist. So I'm in a department called aquatic sustainability. Oh, boy. Yeah. Wow. I'm not a Greta Thornburg.

So aquatic sustainability, it's basically trying to make a lot of facilities more aquatically sustainable for the environment, like oceans, like aquariums and things like that.

Yeah, I know.

I know. Like any fun facts, I can wiggle my ears individually.