Nicole

Right.

Yeah, I guess the practicality of it is the part that I'm struggling with because it definitely triggers my past, like, rejection issues and, like, my people-pleasing issues.

Why does she get a vote?

And...

I guess because the family gets together often.

Right.

I guess where I struggle is when we are in the same household, and usually it's for multiple days because it's at big events.

Like, I struggle personally with either completely ignoring them because I feel awkward or maybe trying too hard.

So I don't know how to practically interact with her when we're in the same room.

Yes.

So I have a history of stepping out sexually to meet my deep needs.

and trauma.

There was a lot of unprocessed things I didn't deal with, and I brought it into the marriage.

And I fully take responsibility, but I know that there were things in the marriage that triggered those things, and I didn't deal with it in a healthy way, so I decided to have the affair.

But the biggest thing was just a deep lack of emotional connection with my husband.

And so I was seeking that elsewhere.

It's that deep feeling of like being known and being disconnected, like on an intimate level.

He, unfortunately, he's a great guy, like he really is, but he struggles with deep.

Being beat and being past surface level just because of its own trauma.

Yes, I can relate to that.