Nir Eyal

The problem was I was in Singapore and she was in central Florida where I grew up.

Now I decided to look for the best florist I could find.

I looked at all the Google reviews.

I stayed up till one in the morning to call the florist to make sure they would be delivered on time.

And I went to bed that evening and thought, Nir, you did a good job.

What a good son.

Your mom's going to call you tomorrow morning and tell you how much she loved the flowers.

That's not what happened, John.

What happened was, is that when I called her the next morning, I said, hey, mom, happy birthday.

Did you get the flowers I sent?

To which she responded, yes, I did.

Thank you.

But the flowers that you sent, they were half dead.

And so don't call that florist again.

To which I responded something like, well, that's the last time I buy you flowers.

And that went over just about as well as you'd expect.

Not so good.

After the call, I turned to my wife who was listening during this whole conversation and she turned to me and she said, would you like to do a turnaround?

To which I said, no, I don't want to do your touchy feely, hocus pocus, mumbo jumbo.

I want to vent because that's what we're supposed to do.