Ocean Vuong

And monks, some monks widen that window probably for the rest of their life. That window is their life's width. For me, I get little brief moments. And I think I was spared that horrible outcome because of Big Joe Satori. And any other day he would have done it, right? But he saw that it's not going to be good. And it was his wisdom.

And, you know, you tell yourself you can control your life and all that. But moments like that happen and you're just like... I don't know. It was up to me that I got here. It was somebody else. A week after that, I went to the public library. Because I would take my grandmother to the library. And she was schizophrenic. So she was kind of like a thousand Asian grandmas in one.

And, you know, you tell yourself you can control your life and all that. But moments like that happen and you're just like... I don't know. It was up to me that I got here. It was somebody else. A week after that, I went to the public library. Because I would take my grandmother to the library. And she was schizophrenic. So she was kind of like a thousand Asian grandmas in one.

So she kept making altars all over the house. And she would go to the library and she would steal pictures of Buddha and frame it for her altars. And I would just sit there and she would just sit there and just cut out and put it in a folder. And then I started to like, I'm like, what is this book? You know, let me just read this. What was the book? I would just start reading Buddhism books.

So she kept making altars all over the house. And she would go to the library and she would steal pictures of Buddha and frame it for her altars. And I would just sit there and she would just sit there and just cut out and put it in a folder. And then I started to like, I'm like, what is this book? You know, let me just read this. What was the book? I would just start reading Buddhism books.

But then I end up in the Buddhism religion section, right? And I would go back by myself. And I was deeply interested in like understanding the suffering. And Buddhism was so enticing for me serendipitously because the Four Noble Truths is that life is suffering. And I was like, oh my God. Yes. I'm in there, right? And it's like, you are not your past. You can alter your life, right?

But then I end up in the Buddhism religion section, right? And I would go back by myself. And I was deeply interested in like understanding the suffering. And Buddhism was so enticing for me serendipitously because the Four Noble Truths is that life is suffering. And I was like, oh my God. Yes. I'm in there, right? And it's like, you are not your past. You can alter your life, right?

You don't have to wait for anybody. You don't have to negotiate with a higher being. Because Buddhism is all about action. It's all about your conduct. And I was trying to find a way out, and I went to my guidance counselor. And I told him, I said, there's a university called University of the West where you can study a liberal arts degree and then become a monk.

You don't have to wait for anybody. You don't have to negotiate with a higher being. Because Buddhism is all about action. It's all about your conduct. And I was trying to find a way out, and I went to my guidance counselor. And I told him, I said, there's a university called University of the West where you can study a liberal arts degree and then become a monk.

I said, I want to help me, help me get there. And he said, I would love to get you there, but it's not accredited. And I think if you want to go to school, you should have a real degree, and then you could still be a monk. So he persuaded me to go to community college. My first class there, the syllabus was Baldwin, Annie Dillard, Foucault.

I said, I want to help me, help me get there. And he said, I would love to get you there, but it's not accredited. And I think if you want to go to school, you should have a real degree, and then you could still be a monk. So he persuaded me to go to community college. My first class there, the syllabus was Baldwin, Annie Dillard, Foucault.

Then I realized writing was not like writing a good respectable email to get a job. It was a medium of understanding suffering. That's when it changed.

Then I realized writing was not like writing a good respectable email to get a job. It was a medium of understanding suffering. That's when it changed.

I wanted to dedicate the book to her. I wanted to use her name to honor her as a real person. But long story short, after I dropped out of Pace University, I lost housing. Then I applied to Brooklyn College. I got in, but I didn't have a place to live. I was couch surfing. That quickly ran out. And I hesitate to call myself homeless because it was just two and a half weeks.

I wanted to dedicate the book to her. I wanted to use her name to honor her as a real person. But long story short, after I dropped out of Pace University, I lost housing. Then I applied to Brooklyn College. I got in, but I didn't have a place to live. I was couch surfing. That quickly ran out. And I hesitate to call myself homeless because it was just two and a half weeks.

I stayed in Penn Station for two and a half weeks. But it was not the way you think. I was a student at Brooklyn College. I had a library. I had a computer. But I would go to sleep in Penn State in the Long Island Railroad sector underneath Madison Square Garden. It's very warm.

I stayed in Penn Station for two and a half weeks. But it was not the way you think. I was a student at Brooklyn College. I had a library. I had a computer. But I would go to sleep in Penn State in the Long Island Railroad sector underneath Madison Square Garden. It's very warm.

And what I would do is I would print out a fake ticket, and that would get you into the red hat area where it's much more comfortable.

And what I would do is I would print out a fake ticket, and that would get you into the red hat area where it's much more comfortable.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I would do that until like 5.30. Then I would wake up and I would take the 1 and 2 down to Flatbush, go to the library in the corner and sleep until my first class at 9 or 10. It's one day where my partner... We were dating at the time, and he was living in Queens, but he was going home that day to Long Island.