Patric Gagne

When I do something, I don't tell anybody about it. And to your point, these empaths, and again, there's nothing wrong with being empathic, but yes, that word has become Almost revolting because to me, it's like, okay, oh, you're an empath, huh? Well, why didn't I see you at that huge traumatic event that happened in our neighborhood? I don't remember seeing you there.

Yes, yes. And I remember a couple years ago, a friend of ours passed just weeks after delivering a child because- she had been complaining to the doctor and the doctor basically blew her off. It was so horrendous. And I remember saying, I'm just going to go over to the house. And everyone's saying, you shouldn't do that. You shouldn't do that. You should just leave them alone. You shouldn't.

Yes, yes. And I remember a couple years ago, a friend of ours passed just weeks after delivering a child because- she had been complaining to the doctor and the doctor basically blew her off. It was so horrendous. And I remember saying, I'm just going to go over to the house. And everyone's saying, you shouldn't do that. You shouldn't do that. You should just leave them alone. You shouldn't.

Yes, yes. And I remember a couple years ago, a friend of ours passed just weeks after delivering a child because- she had been complaining to the doctor and the doctor basically blew her off. It was so horrendous. And I remember saying, I'm just going to go over to the house. And everyone's saying, you shouldn't do that. You shouldn't do that. You should just leave them alone. You shouldn't.

And I'm like, no, no, I'm just going to show up. That's what you, no, you wait. No, you just show up. And I think to your point, it's not only am I not going to do that, But I don't want you to do it either because if you do it and I don't do it, then I'm going to look bad. When the reality is it's not comfortable for me to just go to that house where this husband and child are alone and grieving.

And I'm like, no, no, I'm just going to show up. That's what you, no, you wait. No, you just show up. And I think to your point, it's not only am I not going to do that, But I don't want you to do it either because if you do it and I don't do it, then I'm going to look bad. When the reality is it's not comfortable for me to just go to that house where this husband and child are alone and grieving.

And I'm like, no, no, I'm just going to show up. That's what you, no, you wait. No, you just show up. And I think to your point, it's not only am I not going to do that, But I don't want you to do it either because if you do it and I don't do it, then I'm going to look bad. When the reality is it's not comfortable for me to just go to that house where this husband and child are alone and grieving.

That's not a place I want to be. So I'm just going to stay back here and you shouldn't go either because it's inappropriate. No, it's because you don't want to go. That's what's going on here.

That's not a place I want to be. So I'm just going to stay back here and you shouldn't go either because it's inappropriate. No, it's because you don't want to go. That's what's going on here.

That's not a place I want to be. So I'm just going to stay back here and you shouldn't go either because it's inappropriate. No, it's because you don't want to go. That's what's going on here.

I see a lot of moms sort of co-opting the emotional experience. So a child has failed a test. Okay. And The child is not able to have their own emotion before the mom's disappointment or anger or expectations fill that space. That's what I see. And I understand it cognitively. I can imagine how if you have these emotions

I see a lot of moms sort of co-opting the emotional experience. So a child has failed a test. Okay. And The child is not able to have their own emotion before the mom's disappointment or anger or expectations fill that space. That's what I see. And I understand it cognitively. I can imagine how if you have these emotions

I see a lot of moms sort of co-opting the emotional experience. So a child has failed a test. Okay. And The child is not able to have their own emotion before the mom's disappointment or anger or expectations fill that space. That's what I see. And I understand it cognitively. I can imagine how if you have these emotions

and your child is experiencing something that's activating, yes, you're going to experience those emotions, but then it becomes all about the parents and how they feel about what their kid is going through or how they feel about what they perceive as a failure. And mine is different. I don't have those reactions. And there are certainly pros and cons with that.

and your child is experiencing something that's activating, yes, you're going to experience those emotions, but then it becomes all about the parents and how they feel about what their kid is going through or how they feel about what they perceive as a failure. And mine is different. I don't have those reactions. And there are certainly pros and cons with that.

and your child is experiencing something that's activating, yes, you're going to experience those emotions, but then it becomes all about the parents and how they feel about what their kid is going through or how they feel about what they perceive as a failure. And mine is different. I don't have those reactions. And there are certainly pros and cons with that.

There are times where I wish I could relate more. I could connect deeper. But I also know that my kids feel that they can come to me with anything because... I'm going to have a response, but I'm not necessarily going to have a reaction. It's going to be their space. Dang it.

There are times where I wish I could relate more. I could connect deeper. But I also know that my kids feel that they can come to me with anything because... I'm going to have a response, but I'm not necessarily going to have a reaction. It's going to be their space. Dang it.

There are times where I wish I could relate more. I could connect deeper. But I also know that my kids feel that they can come to me with anything because... I'm going to have a response, but I'm not necessarily going to have a reaction. It's going to be their space. Dang it.

Yeah, I think it's a control out of control. You know, I understand that, yes, it must be nice to have guilt, shame, remorse, sort of forcing your hand and things, but it's not fail safe. And I think it's used as a weapon. Yes. I think like anything in moderation, sure. Guilt and shame can be very useful. The problem is it's not ever used in moderation.