Paul Brunson

proved in my life to just be bs there was a better way so when i'm approached with a conventional system like marriage immediately i go hmm let's interrogate this thing yeah and i would say i'm with you throw the system out think about just one thing and you you said this and there's research behind this it's the investment model right theory so the more you invest

proved in my life to just be bs there was a better way so when i'm approached with a conventional system like marriage immediately i go hmm let's interrogate this thing yeah and i would say i'm with you throw the system out think about just one thing and you you said this and there's research behind this it's the investment model right theory so the more you invest

in the preparation of your partnership, in the actual partnership, the more that you're investing time, all resources, the higher satisfaction you have. That's fact, right? That's research. That's in essence what you're saying, right? So that's the way that I would approach it is how can I invest as much as I can in this partnership with this person that I love?

in the preparation of your partnership, in the actual partnership, the more that you're investing time, all resources, the higher satisfaction you have. That's fact, right? That's research. That's in essence what you're saying, right? So that's the way that I would approach it is how can I invest as much as I can in this partnership with this person that I love?

What is it that predicts a successful marriage in your view? Well, once again, what is success? To me, success is high satisfaction. High satisfaction has a strong correlation around well-being. Dr. Carol Riff, I think, is the OG of well-being. She doesn't get enough credit. She created a model called the six dimensions of psychological well-being.

What is it that predicts a successful marriage in your view? Well, once again, what is success? To me, success is high satisfaction. High satisfaction has a strong correlation around well-being. Dr. Carol Riff, I think, is the OG of well-being. She doesn't get enough credit. She created a model called the six dimensions of psychological well-being.

And in essence, if we are working to increase each one of these dimensions, so for example, one is having a vision of your life. Like what is that vision that you have for life? And the question though is do you feel like you are actively in pursuit of that vision? If you don't feel like you know what your vision is or you're not in pursuit of it, you're going to have lower well-being, right?

And in essence, if we are working to increase each one of these dimensions, so for example, one is having a vision of your life. Like what is that vision that you have for life? And the question though is do you feel like you are actively in pursuit of that vision? If you don't feel like you know what your vision is or you're not in pursuit of it, you're going to have lower well-being, right?

So the higher well-being that you have individually, the higher satisfaction you have in your relationship, the more successful your relationship is.

So the higher well-being that you have individually, the higher satisfaction you have in your relationship, the more successful your relationship is.

All of that – like fundamental qualities that I should be looking for in a good partner?

All of that – like fundamental qualities that I should be looking for in a good partner?

Oh yeah. I mean, there's a million, but the core, the core that I like to write about is, and I'll actually, I'll even synthesize it. You want to have a partner who is aware of their wellbeing and who is focused on their wellbeing. This is incredibly important because

Oh yeah. I mean, there's a million, but the core, the core that I like to write about is, and I'll actually, I'll even synthesize it. You want to have a partner who is aware of their wellbeing and who is focused on their wellbeing. This is incredibly important because

One of the most profound bits of research that I feel like I include in the book is that most of us believe that having alignment in the values of our partner is the most successful or is the number one determinant of having a successful partnership. We think it's about values. We're told it's about values. We're fed values, which, by the way, goes back to – you know where that goes back to?

One of the most profound bits of research that I feel like I include in the book is that most of us believe that having alignment in the values of our partner is the most successful or is the number one determinant of having a successful partnership. We think it's about values. We're told it's about values. We're fed values, which, by the way, goes back to – you know where that goes back to?

Oh, you haven't heard this? No, no, no. You're not reading your Bibles.

Oh, you haven't heard this? No, no, no. You're not reading your Bibles.

All right. So the Bible. talks about you have to have a partner. You have to find a partner who's equally yoked. What does that really mean? Equally yoked comes from oxen, right? So two, you have one ox here, one ox here. They're tethered together. They're plowing the land. If they're walking lockstep, they can plow the land.

All right. So the Bible. talks about you have to have a partner. You have to find a partner who's equally yoked. What does that really mean? Equally yoked comes from oxen, right? So two, you have one ox here, one ox here. They're tethered together. They're plowing the land. If they're walking lockstep, they can plow the land.