Paul Eastwick

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1,562 appearances 7 recordings 3 series first heard Feb 2026 last heard 24 May

Paul Eastwick’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 7 in all, peaking in Feb 2026 with 3.

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Sonia and Simon · Why Your “Type” Is Ruining Your Love Life | Paul Eastwick · 24 May 2026 podcast

The problem is if I had accidentally mixed up the list and

and I had set you up with somebody that actually fit another person's deal breakers, you would have told me, good job, you really selected somebody who fits what I'm looking for.

So the problem there is that the things that we list out as being especially important to us, well, those are good traits, but they tend not to uniquely appeal to us.

Yeah, there is some of that.

It's a funny thing, because when you look at like a network of people's exes, this work's actually very challenging to do because it's not can't always get the exes to participate in the study.

But if you do, what you'll sometimes see is that they just kind of all seem vaguely unrelated to each other.

I mean, they might share a few things in common.

A lot of times those things are derivative of where you live, right?

I would probably be dating, you know, U.S.

Americans, for example, because that's where I live.

But you're right that there's this funny dance of, oh, you know, I dated somebody with these qualities.

those things didn't work out that well, let me now try something a little bit different.

There will be other consistencies.

Some are things that really do appeal to you and other things that is, you know, you're just kind of randomly picking somebody that has the same qualities.

So I think what you're describing is in part why

People often find it helpful to try out different things as they're dating.

I actually think secretly the apps are taking away some of this variability because they give us so much control over who we're meeting in the first place that those experiences that you've had of dating people who are a little different from each other, I worry that people aren't having those experiences as much.

yeah i mean i think the challenge with attraction in particular is that if we're talking about snap judgments on apps or even first impressions although to a lesser extent especially on the apps there's a real tendency for the hot desirable people to kind of dominate the market

And what that means is that for most of us, we have kind of a demoralizing experience on the apps.

You feel like nobody's responding to your messages or are these people even seeing my profile in the first place?

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