Rachel Carlson

So Joy is hypothesizing that disagreement might be really taxing on us. Like you're expending more energy when you disagree with someone than when you agree with them. Okay.

So Joy is hypothesizing that disagreement might be really taxing on us. Like you're expending more energy when you disagree with someone than when you agree with them. Okay.

So Joy is hypothesizing that disagreement might be really taxing on us. Like you're expending more energy when you disagree with someone than when you agree with them. Okay.

First, kind of like we said before, we decide if we want to have a conversation with someone and also if that person is going to be receptive. You can always walk away.

First, kind of like we said before, we decide if we want to have a conversation with someone and also if that person is going to be receptive. You can always walk away.

First, kind of like we said before, we decide if we want to have a conversation with someone and also if that person is going to be receptive. You can always walk away.

So that's kind of like step zero. Decide, do I want to have a conversation with this person? Yeah. But if we do decide to engage with that person, the first step in a potential disagreement is simple. Focus on your breathing.

So that's kind of like step zero. Decide, do I want to have a conversation with this person? Yeah. But if we do decide to engage with that person, the first step in a potential disagreement is simple. Focus on your breathing.

So that's kind of like step zero. Decide, do I want to have a conversation with this person? Yeah. But if we do decide to engage with that person, the first step in a potential disagreement is simple. Focus on your breathing.

Allison co-teaches that Bridging Differences class with Rudy I mentioned earlier. She told me that this moment, slowing down, breathing, can help us move into step two, which is coming back to our goals for the conversation. Right, like she described it as an intention? Yeah, why we're having it, what we're looking to get out of it.

Allison co-teaches that Bridging Differences class with Rudy I mentioned earlier. She told me that this moment, slowing down, breathing, can help us move into step two, which is coming back to our goals for the conversation. Right, like she described it as an intention? Yeah, why we're having it, what we're looking to get out of it.

Allison co-teaches that Bridging Differences class with Rudy I mentioned earlier. She told me that this moment, slowing down, breathing, can help us move into step two, which is coming back to our goals for the conversation. Right, like she described it as an intention? Yeah, why we're having it, what we're looking to get out of it.

Because research shows it's not super easy to change someone's mind. And it can be pretty ineffective to spout facts at someone to try to do this. Yeah. But Allison and Rudy both told me we can find more common ground with someone... when we try to understand their perspective instead of trying to convince them that they're wrong.

Because research shows it's not super easy to change someone's mind. And it can be pretty ineffective to spout facts at someone to try to do this. Yeah. But Allison and Rudy both told me we can find more common ground with someone... when we try to understand their perspective instead of trying to convince them that they're wrong.

Because research shows it's not super easy to change someone's mind. And it can be pretty ineffective to spout facts at someone to try to do this. Yeah. But Allison and Rudy both told me we can find more common ground with someone... when we try to understand their perspective instead of trying to convince them that they're wrong.

And it kind of seems like they have the right idea, at least from a scientific perspective. Research shows that people who engage in dialogues or conversations to learn rather than to win come away from those conversations with a more open perspective.

And it kind of seems like they have the right idea, at least from a scientific perspective. Research shows that people who engage in dialogues or conversations to learn rather than to win come away from those conversations with a more open perspective.

And it kind of seems like they have the right idea, at least from a scientific perspective. Research shows that people who engage in dialogues or conversations to learn rather than to win come away from those conversations with a more open perspective.

Yeah, that's a great question, Emily. And it's our third step, empathy. So that includes asking the person you're talking to questions about themselves, trying to humanize them to learn more than just their opinion on whatever topic it is that's bringing up these feelings.

Yeah, that's a great question, Emily. And it's our third step, empathy. So that includes asking the person you're talking to questions about themselves, trying to humanize them to learn more than just their opinion on whatever topic it is that's bringing up these feelings.