Rachelle Hampton

It's Captain Jack Morgan Sparrow who tells Josie, hey, the drinks we're going to be serving at tonight's performance will be doubles. What? People are going to be rowdy. It needs to be a good show. Josie's like, OK, first of all, it's always a good show. Fuck you. Second of all, what's going on? And Captain Jack Morgan Sparrow is like, it's none of your business.

It's Captain Jack Morgan Sparrow who tells Josie, hey, the drinks we're going to be serving at tonight's performance will be doubles. What? People are going to be rowdy. It needs to be a good show. Josie's like, OK, first of all, it's always a good show. Fuck you. Second of all, what's going on? And Captain Jack Morgan Sparrow is like, it's none of your business.

Josie rolls her eyes. She's used to this. She does some recon of her own before the dinnertime show and finds out from some of the navigational crew that the ship is heading into a really strong windstorm.

Josie rolls her eyes. She's used to this. She does some recon of her own before the dinnertime show and finds out from some of the navigational crew that the ship is heading into a really strong windstorm.

Okay, so Josie's experienced this before, so she's not that worried. Kelsey, are you worried? I'm so stressed. I'm, like, super stressed.

Okay, so Josie's experienced this before, so she's not that worried. Kelsey, are you worried? I'm so stressed. I'm, like, super stressed.

They don't take instruction well. Oh, no. And the thing is, every single year, a bunch of passengers get on board and they ask if there's a chance of a Titanic event happening. And Josie has to be like, no, the Titanic happened because of a series of human errors, not the ship being bad. Also, it's been 100 years. Get a new reference. These questions only intensify when there's a storm.

They don't take instruction well. Oh, no. And the thing is, every single year, a bunch of passengers get on board and they ask if there's a chance of a Titanic event happening. And Josie has to be like, no, the Titanic happened because of a series of human errors, not the ship being bad. Also, it's been 100 years. Get a new reference. These questions only intensify when there's a storm.

So Josie actually doesn't mind everyone being drunk at the show. In fact, it makes her life easier. And the tips are better. Okay. And the thing is, that night show actually goes fine. Like the storm's not as bad as expected. It's like a little rocky, but everyone's too drunk to notice. It's like when the pilot of the airplane is like, there'll be turbulence. And then it's like just a little bit.

So Josie actually doesn't mind everyone being drunk at the show. In fact, it makes her life easier. And the tips are better. Okay. And the thing is, that night show actually goes fine. Like the storm's not as bad as expected. It's like a little rocky, but everyone's too drunk to notice. It's like when the pilot of the airplane is like, there'll be turbulence. And then it's like just a little bit.

And you're like, oh, nice. Again, everyone's too drunk to notice. But not Josie, who's painfully sober. And who is noticing that Mira is acting really fucking squirrely. She's keeping her room key in her bra. She's whispering with her little 20-something friends. Her solos are longer than ever. Oh, my God. Josie's had enough. Get this Mariah Carey wannabe off this fucking stage.

And you're like, oh, nice. Again, everyone's too drunk to notice. But not Josie, who's painfully sober. And who is noticing that Mira is acting really fucking squirrely. She's keeping her room key in her bra. She's whispering with her little 20-something friends. Her solos are longer than ever. Oh, my God. Josie's had enough. Get this Mariah Carey wannabe off this fucking stage.

It's giving glitter. So the next day the storm dies down and around noon there's an announcement over the intercom. They've reached the Antarctica passport point. What? This is where passengers get off the ship to get their passport stamped to show they've been to Antarctica, which is a big reason why people go on these cruises. There are some really cute science buildings.

It's giving glitter. So the next day the storm dies down and around noon there's an announcement over the intercom. They've reached the Antarctica passport point. What? This is where passengers get off the ship to get their passport stamped to show they've been to Antarctica, which is a big reason why people go on these cruises. There are some really cute science buildings.

I do support scientific research in Antarctica, but that's it. They're also penguins. Okay. All of the passengers get off the ship to go look around. And a lot of the crew does too, because this is the last Antarctica disembarkment of the contract. A lot of the performers who usually just skip this are like, it's my last time to do this. I should do this.

I do support scientific research in Antarctica, but that's it. They're also penguins. Okay. All of the passengers get off the ship to go look around. And a lot of the crew does too, because this is the last Antarctica disembarkment of the contract. A lot of the performers who usually just skip this are like, it's my last time to do this. I should do this.

It's like seeing the Eiffel Tower on your last day in Paris. You're just like, let me do this thing. Let me just say goodbye to the penguins. Yeah. Exactly. Josie's been there, done that. She spots Mira leaving with her huge Canada goose jacket. Oh, my God. And she's like, heist time, baby. Oh, my God. If you were to try to pull off a heist at high sea, how would you do it?

It's like seeing the Eiffel Tower on your last day in Paris. You're just like, let me do this thing. Let me just say goodbye to the penguins. Yeah. Exactly. Josie's been there, done that. She spots Mira leaving with her huge Canada goose jacket. Oh, my God. And she's like, heist time, baby. Oh, my God. If you were to try to pull off a heist at high sea, how would you do it?

And you're her boss.

And you're her boss.