Rob Dial

It could be becoming a people pleaser so that peace was kept in the house and nobody fought in any sort of way. And this wasn't about being mature for your age, which I know many of us hear when our children, oh, they're such a good child. They're so mature for their age. Really what this is is hypervigilance disguised as responsibility. Think about that for a second.

It could be becoming a people pleaser so that peace was kept in the house and nobody fought in any sort of way. And this wasn't about being mature for your age, which I know many of us hear when our children, oh, they're such a good child. They're so mature for their age. Really what this is is hypervigilance disguised as responsibility. Think about that for a second.

A child at five, six, seven, eight years old isn't necessarily responsible, but they become responsible as a way to keep the peace or as a way to feel more safe around everything that's happening. And it worked for a while in your childhood. It worked because you built it in some sort of way. And once again, the child is not unconsciously building this. The child is unconsciously building this.

A child at five, six, seven, eight years old isn't necessarily responsible, but they become responsible as a way to keep the peace or as a way to feel more safe around everything that's happening. And it worked for a while in your childhood. It worked because you built it in some sort of way. And once again, the child is not unconsciously building this. The child is unconsciously building this.

A child at five, six, seven, eight years old isn't necessarily responsible, but they become responsible as a way to keep the peace or as a way to feel more safe around everything that's happening. And it worked for a while in your childhood. It worked because you built it in some sort of way. And once again, the child is not unconsciously building this. The child is unconsciously building this.

But what's really important is, is just because something was useful in the past doesn't mean that it's serving you right now. What protected you back then a lot of times traps you now. Because as an adult, this strategy kind of morphs and changes into perfectionism or micromanaging other people or anxiety when things aren't planned out.

But what's really important is, is just because something was useful in the past doesn't mean that it's serving you right now. What protected you back then a lot of times traps you now. Because as an adult, this strategy kind of morphs and changes into perfectionism or micromanaging other people or anxiety when things aren't planned out.

But what's really important is, is just because something was useful in the past doesn't mean that it's serving you right now. What protected you back then a lot of times traps you now. Because as an adult, this strategy kind of morphs and changes into perfectionism or micromanaging other people or anxiety when things aren't planned out.

or the inability to trust others to quote-unquote do it right, or guilt when you're not on top of everything, or becoming a helicopter parent. Control, control, control, control. That's how it morphs from childhood into adulthood. And when you control, control, control, control, control other people, what does it feel like? To the other person, it feels like being smothered.

or the inability to trust others to quote-unquote do it right, or guilt when you're not on top of everything, or becoming a helicopter parent. Control, control, control, control. That's how it morphs from childhood into adulthood. And when you control, control, control, control, control other people, what does it feel like? To the other person, it feels like being smothered.

or the inability to trust others to quote-unquote do it right, or guilt when you're not on top of everything, or becoming a helicopter parent. Control, control, control, control. That's how it morphs from childhood into adulthood. And when you control, control, control, control, control other people, what does it feel like? To the other person, it feels like being smothered.

It's not that you love control. It's that your nervous system associates control with safety. And that's what it really comes down to. This is deeper than habits and character traits. It's a wiring that happened in childhood. It's the operating system that's underneath your adult life. The little inner child inside of you never healed from what it went through.

It's not that you love control. It's that your nervous system associates control with safety. And that's what it really comes down to. This is deeper than habits and character traits. It's a wiring that happened in childhood. It's the operating system that's underneath your adult life. The little inner child inside of you never healed from what it went through.

It's not that you love control. It's that your nervous system associates control with safety. And that's what it really comes down to. This is deeper than habits and character traits. It's a wiring that happened in childhood. It's the operating system that's underneath your adult life. The little inner child inside of you never healed from what it went through.

So it keeps doing what it's always done. Get it? And like any other outdated system, eventually an outdated system starts glitching in some way. So you try to rest, but you feel like you're wasting time. You ask for help, but then you redo something that somebody else did because it's not quote unquote perfect. You say somebody to say somebody say, oh, I trust you.

So it keeps doing what it's always done. Get it? And like any other outdated system, eventually an outdated system starts glitching in some way. So you try to rest, but you feel like you're wasting time. You ask for help, but then you redo something that somebody else did because it's not quote unquote perfect. You say somebody to say somebody say, oh, I trust you.

So it keeps doing what it's always done. Get it? And like any other outdated system, eventually an outdated system starts glitching in some way. So you try to rest, but you feel like you're wasting time. You ask for help, but then you redo something that somebody else did because it's not quote unquote perfect. You say somebody to say somebody say, oh, I trust you.

But then your body really doesn't. It says otherwise. And here's the truth. It's not about being a type A person. It's a trauma response in disguise. And so it shows up many different ways in your life. In relationships, it can ruin relationships. You might avoid vulnerability. You keep emotional walls up because letting go is really risky in some way.

But then your body really doesn't. It says otherwise. And here's the truth. It's not about being a type A person. It's a trauma response in disguise. And so it shows up many different ways in your life. In relationships, it can ruin relationships. You might avoid vulnerability. You keep emotional walls up because letting go is really risky in some way.

But then your body really doesn't. It says otherwise. And here's the truth. It's not about being a type A person. It's a trauma response in disguise. And so it shows up many different ways in your life. In relationships, it can ruin relationships. You might avoid vulnerability. You keep emotional walls up because letting go is really risky in some way.