Rob Dial

And so the thing that's really important behind this that I really wanna talk about is we're talking about being a child here. And we're talking about the fact that you develop this system, I guess you could say, of control in your childhood because you did not feel safe in some way. And so you had to develop this control issue so that you could feel safe. Here's the hardest part of all of it.

And so the thing that's really important behind this that I really wanna talk about is we're talking about being a child here. And we're talking about the fact that you develop this system, I guess you could say, of control in your childhood because you did not feel safe in some way. And so you had to develop this control issue so that you could feel safe. Here's the hardest part of all of it.

Beneath all of this urge to control, a lot of times for most people is often grief. Grief for the childhood that you didn't get, grief for the caretakers who couldn't show up, grief for the safety that you had to create instead of receiving, which is what children should receive as a child. And when we finally stop and ask, why do I feel responsible for everything?

Beneath all of this urge to control, a lot of times for most people is often grief. Grief for the childhood that you didn't get, grief for the caretakers who couldn't show up, grief for the safety that you had to create instead of receiving, which is what children should receive as a child. And when we finally stop and ask, why do I feel responsible for everything?

Beneath all of this urge to control, a lot of times for most people is often grief. Grief for the childhood that you didn't get, grief for the caretakers who couldn't show up, grief for the safety that you had to create instead of receiving, which is what children should receive as a child. And when we finally stop and ask, why do I feel responsible for everything?

we start, or whatever it might be that kind of cracks us open, we begin to realize, oh my God, that little kid just didn't feel safe in some ways. Like, how sad is that? And it gives you a chance to really crack yourself open and to mourn what you might not have had and how you had to grow up too soon. And that's really when you start healing is when you allow yourself to feel those feelings.

we start, or whatever it might be that kind of cracks us open, we begin to realize, oh my God, that little kid just didn't feel safe in some ways. Like, how sad is that? And it gives you a chance to really crack yourself open and to mourn what you might not have had and how you had to grow up too soon. And that's really when you start healing is when you allow yourself to feel those feelings.

we start, or whatever it might be that kind of cracks us open, we begin to realize, oh my God, that little kid just didn't feel safe in some ways. Like, how sad is that? And it gives you a chance to really crack yourself open and to mourn what you might not have had and how you had to grow up too soon. And that's really when you start healing is when you allow yourself to feel those feelings.

Because in that moment, we stop blaming ourselves for how we are now and And we start realizing, oh, that was just something that I had to develop in childhood. And so we begin seeing our control issues for what they are, which is love in some way, longing for a better relationship, wanting more protection, the simple case of just trying to feel safe.

Because in that moment, we stop blaming ourselves for how we are now and And we start realizing, oh, that was just something that I had to develop in childhood. And so we begin seeing our control issues for what they are, which is love in some way, longing for a better relationship, wanting more protection, the simple case of just trying to feel safe.

Because in that moment, we stop blaming ourselves for how we are now and And we start realizing, oh, that was just something that I had to develop in childhood. And so we begin seeing our control issues for what they are, which is love in some way, longing for a better relationship, wanting more protection, the simple case of just trying to feel safe.

And so you start to realize, oh my gosh, what I need to do is actually develop a better relationship with that child who didn't have the safety that it actually wanted. And so what you learn to do as you start to shift from control to something else, what do you shift to? You shift to trust. which is what it really looks like.

And so you start to realize, oh my gosh, what I need to do is actually develop a better relationship with that child who didn't have the safety that it actually wanted. And so what you learn to do as you start to shift from control to something else, what do you shift to? You shift to trust. which is what it really looks like.

And so you start to realize, oh my gosh, what I need to do is actually develop a better relationship with that child who didn't have the safety that it actually wanted. And so what you learn to do as you start to shift from control to something else, what do you shift to? You shift to trust. which is what it really looks like.

And that's really where it gets hard because you most likely developed your control issues because you couldn't trust who was raising you in some ways as a child. And so now you've got to switch from control to trust. And healing doesn't mean that you become like totally chill overnight. What it means is that you're rewiring what safety means to you.

And that's really where it gets hard because you most likely developed your control issues because you couldn't trust who was raising you in some ways as a child. And so now you've got to switch from control to trust. And healing doesn't mean that you become like totally chill overnight. What it means is that you're rewiring what safety means to you.

And that's really where it gets hard because you most likely developed your control issues because you couldn't trust who was raising you in some ways as a child. And so now you've got to switch from control to trust. And healing doesn't mean that you become like totally chill overnight. What it means is that you're rewiring what safety means to you.

You learn to teach your nervous system that it's okay to relax, that you don't have to be hypervigilant in every single moment, that you can, oh God, you can exhale at some point in time without having to earn it. You start to learn at work that you can delegate. Oh my gosh. It could be delegation at work. It could be delegation with your children.

You learn to teach your nervous system that it's okay to relax, that you don't have to be hypervigilant in every single moment, that you can, oh God, you can exhale at some point in time without having to earn it. You start to learn at work that you can delegate. Oh my gosh. It could be delegation at work. It could be delegation with your children.

You learn to teach your nervous system that it's okay to relax, that you don't have to be hypervigilant in every single moment, that you can, oh God, you can exhale at some point in time without having to earn it. You start to learn at work that you can delegate. Oh my gosh. It could be delegation at work. It could be delegation with your children.