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Roy Wood Jr.

πŸ‘€ Speaker
3542 total appearances

Appearances Over Time

Podcast Appearances

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

Anyone wearing leather in the summertime means business. In 1967, the Black Panthers protested against California gun control by marching to the Capitol with their grievances and some AK-47s. That's right, white people. I know you like to think that being out in public with the big gun was your idea, but that was some black shit first.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

Anyone wearing leather in the summertime means business. In 1967, the Black Panthers protested against California gun control by marching to the Capitol with their grievances and some AK-47s. That's right, white people. I know you like to think that being out in public with the big gun was your idea, but that was some black shit first.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

And while bringing guns to a debate about gun control is not very logical, it is very effective. In fact, it gives you the upper hand in most situations. My Uncle Bebo once walked into a Chipotle and forgot he had a loaded pistol in his hand. He got free guacamole for life. Well done, Uncle Bebo.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

And while bringing guns to a debate about gun control is not very logical, it is very effective. In fact, it gives you the upper hand in most situations. My Uncle Bebo once walked into a Chipotle and forgot he had a loaded pistol in his hand. He got free guacamole for life. Well done, Uncle Bebo.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

But before you criticize armed protests, remember, it was a different time and you had to be there, which I was not. I wanted to join the Black Panthers, but the day before the protest, my barber cut my afro too low and I ended up with a buzz fade. I couldn't join the Black Panthers looking that square. I look like a Wesley Snipes who does pay his taxes.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

But before you criticize armed protests, remember, it was a different time and you had to be there, which I was not. I wanted to join the Black Panthers, but the day before the protest, my barber cut my afro too low and I ended up with a buzz fade. I couldn't join the Black Panthers looking that square. I look like a Wesley Snipes who does pay his taxes.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

And finally, I would be remiss if I did not mention the powerful black women who fought to unshackle the chains of oppression. One of those icons is Ida B. Wells, who famously took over a 1913 march for women's suffrage. The white women said that she had to march in the back, but Ida refused, telling those white ladies, either I go with you or not at all.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

And finally, I would be remiss if I did not mention the powerful black women who fought to unshackle the chains of oppression. One of those icons is Ida B. Wells, who famously took over a 1913 march for women's suffrage. The white women said that she had to march in the back, but Ida refused, telling those white ladies, either I go with you or not at all.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

which is basically a turn-of-the-century way of saying, I'm about to take my earrings off, heifer. Now, I didn't attend this march either, because I was not yet born. But my grandmother Regina Wood Jr. was able to go, but she didn't go.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

which is basically a turn-of-the-century way of saying, I'm about to take my earrings off, heifer. Now, I didn't attend this march either, because I was not yet born. But my grandmother Regina Wood Jr. was able to go, but she didn't go.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

She said she was going with her best friend Susan, but the two got lost on the way and somehow they ended up in the Caribbean, where they've been living as roommates ever since. Well, that's all the time we have for today. I'm Roy Wood Jr. This has been CP Time. And remember, we're for the culture. Must have been more than friends, I guess. They ain't got but one bed in they house.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

She said she was going with her best friend Susan, but the two got lost on the way and somehow they ended up in the Caribbean, where they've been living as roommates ever since. Well, that's all the time we have for today. I'm Roy Wood Jr. This has been CP Time. And remember, we're for the culture. Must have been more than friends, I guess. They ain't got but one bed in they house.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

39.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

39.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

Here's the thing. Newspaper Franklin was great. Newspaper Franklin was great. You can't argue that. But when they put him on TV, it was a different story. All of a sudden, they made him a stereotype.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

Here's the thing. Newspaper Franklin was great. Newspaper Franklin was great. You can't argue that. But when they put him on TV, it was a different story. All of a sudden, they made him a stereotype.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

Why couldn't Franklin just do the hokey pokey, Trevor? You telling me black kids can't put their left foot in and take their left foot out? It looked like Franklin was auditioning for House Party 2.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

Why couldn't Franklin just do the hokey pokey, Trevor? You telling me black kids can't put their left foot in and take their left foot out? It looked like Franklin was auditioning for House Party 2.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

It was every time with this kid. Any time you walk down the street in Peanutsville, you might run into Franklin and his homeboy, pop walking. And even when he's hanging out with his friends, everyone else gets a normal handshake, but no, not Franklin. He got a slapped skin. See what I mean? All the other Peanuts are just kids, but Franklin's running around Peanutville like a damn baby shaft.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Black History Month

It was every time with this kid. Any time you walk down the street in Peanutsville, you might run into Franklin and his homeboy, pop walking. And even when he's hanging out with his friends, everyone else gets a normal handshake, but no, not Franklin. He got a slapped skin. See what I mean? All the other Peanuts are just kids, but Franklin's running around Peanutville like a damn baby shaft.