Sarah Jakes Roberts

And so I've had to have some intentional conversation with people about like, give me a realistic view of what this costs so that I can plan for longevity and not just for this season.

I think one, even though like when you're writing books, the resources come from the publisher, there's this fine line of wanting to make sure that my ancillary businesses, which do bring in revenue, doesn't look like I'm taking it from people.

And I think that there are some legitimate concerns and legitimate ill practices that have taken place that has created a distrust between people and faith leaders.

And so I've constantly tried to position myself in such a way that I am able to sustain my life and the things that we have going on in our lives outside of resources or donations from other people.

Like I've always tried to make sure that that was a part of what we do because I am relying ultimately on the gifts and talents that God gave me, just like everyone else has.

And I want to make sure that we're leveraging them with responsibility.

Yes.

Malachi has made me believe that I wasn't as bad as I thought I was.

Because I think I spent so much of his childhood feeling like I'm just such a terrible person, such a terrible mom.

He deserves so much better.

I could do so much better.

But he has some of the most beautiful memories of his childhood.

Like he texted me today, he was eating an orange and he was like, this reminds me of when I went to summer camp and you packed me this huge lunch.

I got to feed all of my friends.

And so even though I felt disconnected and distant, he was still getting a part of me that felt like the best part of me, even though I didn't know I was doing my best, which I think is such a message to women who are trying to do it all.

Mm-hmm.

That in those moments where you're hard on yourself because you feel like you're falling short, that these children, they're grading us on a curve.

They're grading us on a curve and they don't know any different.

And if we can give them the love that we have, if we can give them the presence that we have, even as we're growing and changing, that it's enough.

And as we grow, the more that we give them, that'll be enough too.