Sean Gold

But what I didn't anticipate was that this news would pinball across camp and get to Sarah.

And that made her nervous because Sarah, like me, had never kissed anyone.

And she didn't want people investigating her kissing history and then making fun of her for never having done so.

So instead of saying, no, I don't know who this guy is, she said, oh, yeah, like we did.

It's not a big deal.

So the next day, I'm eating a turkey sandwich and this throng of guys comes up to me and they're like, yo, dude, we talked to Sarah.

She remembers her kiss.

And I'm like, what?

But I didn't...

think she'd remember.

That's so crazy.

And they're like, yo, this is great.

You're going to have a reunion.

And this summer, you're going to hook up.

And I'm like, oh, crap.

So I kid you not, the next six days, I basically hid in the bathroom for 45-minute intervals, trying to avoid this hormonal, Twilight-obsessed, roving mob of teenagers hungry for a romance to make happen in real life.

But all good things must come to an end, and I emerged from the bathroom one day, and lo and behold, there is Sarah Brown.

And she comes up to me and she goes, hey, Sean, I'm Sarah.

I think it's really funny that you told everyone we kissed.

And I was like, oh, hey, Sarah, I think it's really funny that you exist.