Shade Zahrai

That's the habit of agency.

The third habit which links to the internal locus of control is what we call autonomy.

It's the ability to make choices, to take ownership, to focus on what you can control, and to believe that you have some degree of control over the outcome of your life.

And then the fourth, which was emotional stability, we refer to that as the trainable capacity of adaptability.

Specifically, can you adapt to the emotions that come your way?

Or do you just accept them and feel like this is it, and this is a verdict, I'm not meant to do this, and this is too overwhelming?

Or do you say, okay, this is what I'm feeling, what can I do about it?

Is it helping me right now?

Is it hindering me?

Can I reframe it?

Can I channel it?

Can I harness it?

And so when we're talking about confidence, which if we rewind, it's the ability to trust yourself before, you need to trust yourself across these four dimensions.

And again, I go into so much more detail in the book, but I think we can dive into some really tangible tools for everybody.

So that is a reflection of low autonomy, which is that third pillar.

You feel like you don't have control and therefore you're leaning on that so that you don't have to take ownership, so that you don't do anything and then nothing changes.

Now, I was speaking to an audience very recently and I was sharing autonomy and she said, but what if you have so much going on that you actually just want to cruise, you don't want to grow, you want to just stay comfortable?

And I said, that's great, but that's still a choice that you're making.

so i would say to people who say they there's too much going on they don't have the time that's okay if you don't want to grow right now just acknowledge that my priority right now is raising my young family my priority right now is building my business but i need to also acknowledge that if i don't address these four things i will stay stuck and that can be a choice you might be happy with stuck there are some people who live very happy lives in their comfort zone

They're happy they're fulfilled.