Shankar Vedantam

That's exactly right.

So you say that one thing that people can do is that you can write an email to the other person but never send it or write a letter to the other person but never send it.

What would be the value of doing this, Antonio?

You've sometimes, as you're working with clients, you'll have them pull out an empty chair and have a conversation with the empty chair.

What's the value of doing this, Antonia?

You tell the story of one of your clients who had a very difficult relationship with his father.

And in a session, you had the man talk to an empty chair, but also then exchange places and sit in the empty chair and talk to the other chair.

Tell me what happened, Antonio.

You had an Aunt Antonia to whom you were very close.

Tell me her story and how your relationship with her evolved over time.

I'm wondering if I can ask you to do one thing that you ask your clients to do.

I'm wondering if you can sit in the empty chair and tell me how your aunt would have responded to your dedication of the book to her, but also how you felt about her.

Antonio Pasqualeone is a psychologist at the University of Windsor in Canada.

He's the author of Principles of Emotion Change, What Works and When in Psychotherapy and Everyday Life.

Antonio, thank you so much for joining me today on Hidden Brain.

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