Shankar Vedantam

It's the episode titled, Designing a Life That Matters.

How we seek to avoid the truth and the costs of not facing reality, this week on Hidden Brain.

Life isn't easy.

There are times of joy, times of sorrow, and times of uncertainty.

Along the way, we inevitably face setbacks, obstacles, and disappointment.

At Stanford University, Dave Evans says that one way we cope with these challenges is by telling ourselves stories, narratives that help us make sense of what's happening to us.

Dave Evans, welcome to Hidden Brain.

Shankar, good to be with you again.

Dave, you had a friend named Gary.

How did the two of you meet and get to know each other?

One day, Gary came to you with a problem.

Tell me what he told you.

So his problem was, he said, I have a job that I like.

I'm doing what I want to do, but I have this pesky little thing, which is my body is not allowing me to do what I want to do.

And I want you to get my body out of the way so I can go back to doing what I want to do.

I'm wondering how you responded to this request of his to help him understand what his body was trying to tell him, the message it was trying to give him.

Hmm.

I'm wondering whether Gary was getting feedback from other people that was trying to answer the question that he wanted answered, even if it wasn't the right question.

It must have placed you in a very difficult situation, Dave, because a friend is coming to you with this very serious problem.

You feel like your friend is not looking at reality for what it is.