Radical Acceptance
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
This is Hidden Brain. I'm Shankar Vedanta. In the 3rd century BC, China's first emperor, Qin Shi Huang, made a bold proclamation. His dynasty would last 10,000 generations. He launched an obsessive quest for immortality. He ordered expeditions to the eastern sea, demanded his subjects search for an elixir of life, and even welcomed mystics into his court. His obsession came at a cost, putting him at odds with Confucian scholars at the time. Historians have pieced together parts of Qin Shi Huang's story from thousands of wooden strips unearthed in Hunan province. The strips documented his correspondence. These writings included responses from the emperor's minions who were too afraid to tell their boss what they really thought.
According to the BBC, the notes featured, quote, assorted awkward replies from regional governments who had failed to find the key to eternal life. Qin Shi Huang did achieve extraordinary things during his lifetime.
What is radical acceptance and why is it important?
He unified China, standardized currency and measures, built roads and canals, and linked fortresses into what became the Great Wall. but he never found the key to immortality. He died in 210 BC at the age of 49. Even in death, he refused to believe death was the end. His monumental mausoleum, guarded by thousands of terracotta soldiers, was designed to protect him on his journey into the afterlife. What could cause such desperation, such obsession, such refusal to face the inevitable? And is it possible that all of us share something in common with the great Chinese emperor? This is the second part of our exploration into how design thinking can help you lead a more meaningful life. If you missed the first story, you can find it in our podcast feed or at hiddenbrain.org.
It's the episode titled, Designing a Life That Matters. How we seek to avoid the truth and the costs of not facing reality, this week on Hidden Brain.
Life isn't easy. There are times of joy, times of sorrow, and times of uncertainty. Along the way, we inevitably face setbacks, obstacles, and disappointment. At Stanford University, Dave Evans says that one way we cope with these challenges is by telling ourselves stories, narratives that help us make sense of what's happening to us. Dave Evans, welcome to Hidden Brain. Shankar, good to be with you again. Dave, you had a friend named Gary.
How do hidden beliefs affect our ability to accept reality?
How did the two of you meet and get to know each other?
Well, our kids were of similar age, and we frequented the same church. We lived in the same town, so we were neighbors.
One day, Gary came to you with a problem. Tell me what he told you.
Well, his problem was he was having strokes. And it turned out he came from a long line of people who have strokes. He was a technical writer in Silicon Valley. We were in Silicon Valley. And he was having a good career. And his problem was, how could he get back to working full time? He'd had to take a stop out. The way his stroke had hit him was getting in the way of his ability to work. And he was wondering if I could help him figure out a way to get his skills back to where he could get back on the job.
So his problem was, he said, I have a job that I like. I'm doing what I want to do, but I have this pesky little thing, which is my body is not allowing me to do what I want to do. And I want you to get my body out of the way so I can go back to doing what I want to do.
What challenges do we face when trying to accept difficult truths?
Right. He said, well, you know, this, I mean, the problem is, you know, my father died of a stroke. My brother died of a stroke in his late 50s. He was about 52 at the time, something like that. He said, so I don't want to be that guy. Why is this happening? Everything's got to happen for a reason. So it must be that there's something I'm supposed to learn. So if I could learn what it is that this malady is trying to teach me, then maybe it can stop and I can get my life back. So what I really need to do is figure out why I need to learn something from this and what is it. Can you help me with that?
I'm wondering how you responded to this request of his to help him understand what his body was trying to tell him, the message it was trying to give him.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:00–1:12
2
What is radical acceptance and why is it important?
1:12–3:02
3
How do hidden beliefs affect our ability to accept reality?
3:02–4:03
4
What challenges do we face when trying to accept difficult truths?
4:03–5:08
5
How does storytelling help us cope with life's challenges?
5:08–6:42
6
What lessons can we learn from the story of Dave's friend Gary?
6:42–9:08
7
How can design thinking help us lead a more meaningful life?
9:08–11:33
8
What role does patience play in our personal and professional lives?
11:33–1:30:01