Steph Claire Smith

My partner really feels embarrassed and has expressed his frustration about all of this to his family, which has been met with zero resolve.

They don't seem at all excited for the fact we are going to be engaged.

We have had people who barely know us show more interest.

We are now stuck in this weird, awkward limbo with them and I truly don't know what to do anymore.

They seem to insist on shutting me out and I can't help but think I'm not who they wanted for their son or their family.

Wondering if you have any advice on difficult times with in-laws.

Thank you.

This is so hard because like as much as I want to say just lower your expectations and like fucking leave them to it, as in like because they live overseas and they don't want to make an effort, you don't make an effort.

It's very easy for me to say that, right?

But it's a lot harder because I could not even fathom

not feeling that support from your partner's family and him too.

Like this must be really hard for him.

And as you said, like I can imagine that feeling embarrassing or super uncomfortable for sure, for sure.

Yeah.

And I think like with a lot of these things, I mean, usually my go-to response is tell your partner to like talk to his parents and pull their heads in.

But it sounds like he has tried that, which is what's, I suppose, the most disheartening thing, I think, within this whole question.

in itself because that really like sometimes people need to be told that and they need that kind of mirror and then they reflect and they're like, oh, yeah, okay, and things can change.

Or they can have a really blunt, rude response and maybe that can be where you make the decision on how much you are going to continue to try or not.

But it's hard when they've kind of just been silent and not really said much at all.

And I get it as well.