Stephanie Moss

I'm a big fan of hitting the mute button so that you have to bring a ton of intention and consciousness before you start speaking. Or even better, you start speaking, but you're on mute so they don't hear you. So then they start speaking again. Patient listening just needs to be practiced with discipline. And my favorite way to do that is through the mute button.

Once we listen, then we want to acknowledge. And this is where we really are validating what we think we heard and validating to the speaker that we are really trying to hear them. Easy things are when you're in the midst of conversation. Hey, John, I really appreciate a couple of things that you just shared with me.

Once we listen, then we want to acknowledge. And this is where we really are validating what we think we heard and validating to the speaker that we are really trying to hear them. Easy things are when you're in the midst of conversation. Hey, John, I really appreciate a couple of things that you just shared with me.

I have some questions, but before we move on, can I just repeat back what I think I heard? And please correct me if I'm wrong or if I missed something or if I'm not quite getting it. What I think I just heard you say was dot, dot, dot. And then you repeat back. Now, you may repeat back in summary, but that's certainly fine. And you repeat it back. And one of two things is going to happen.

I have some questions, but before we move on, can I just repeat back what I think I heard? And please correct me if I'm wrong or if I missed something or if I'm not quite getting it. What I think I just heard you say was dot, dot, dot. And then you repeat back. Now, you may repeat back in summary, but that's certainly fine. And you repeat it back. And one of two things is going to happen.

You're going to hear John go, yeah, yeah, that's exactly what I'm trying to say. Or he's going to say, well, I'm not sure. And then he's going to keep talking and he is going to naturally move us into the next step, which is the clarifying step. Now, if he goes, yes, thank you. That's exactly what I'm trying to say. You go, awesome. Okay, I just wanted to make sure we're tracking.

You're going to hear John go, yeah, yeah, that's exactly what I'm trying to say. Or he's going to say, well, I'm not sure. And then he's going to keep talking and he is going to naturally move us into the next step, which is the clarifying step. Now, if he goes, yes, thank you. That's exactly what I'm trying to say. You go, awesome. Okay, I just wanted to make sure we're tracking.

And then you guide into clarify. And a way that you do that is phrases such as, hey, now that I think I understand, let me ask you a couple clarifying questions. Or can you tell me more about this? Or you mentioned the commute could be an issue with this opportunity. Can you tell me more about that? Or if you're in a business development call,

And then you guide into clarify. And a way that you do that is phrases such as, hey, now that I think I understand, let me ask you a couple clarifying questions. Or can you tell me more about this? Or you mentioned the commute could be an issue with this opportunity. Can you tell me more about that? Or if you're in a business development call,

Hey, you mentioned that you might have a need for your team in the next six months, but you weren't sure you were going to need a search firm to help fill that. Help me understand what's happening. Where's your bench strength coming from? Walk me through that. Or, you know, hey, you've been super successful hiring on your own their last couple of hires. Clarify. Help me understand.

Hey, you mentioned that you might have a need for your team in the next six months, but you weren't sure you were going to need a search firm to help fill that. Help me understand what's happening. Where's your bench strength coming from? Walk me through that. Or, you know, hey, you've been super successful hiring on your own their last couple of hires. Clarify. Help me understand.

What's your secret sauce in this incredible talent race? We are hearing folks are really struggling. What are you doing well? Help me understand. And clarifying what you're hearing, things like, help me understand, can you tell me more about that, etc. And again, keep in mind, this is when we hear objections, resistance, etc. So then we want them to put a little bit more meat on the bone for us.

What's your secret sauce in this incredible talent race? We are hearing folks are really struggling. What are you doing well? Help me understand. And clarifying what you're hearing, things like, help me understand, can you tell me more about that, etc. And again, keep in mind, this is when we hear objections, resistance, etc. So then we want them to put a little bit more meat on the bone for us.

Then we can come in and expand the conversation further. Expansion can look like, hey, John, so again, if I'm hearing you right, you might have some talent needs down the road.

Then we can come in and expand the conversation further. Expansion can look like, hey, John, so again, if I'm hearing you right, you might have some talent needs down the road.

However, your system to recruit on your own, work through internal referrals, work through your internal talent acquisition team has really provided you with the level of talent that you've needed to fill your back couple positions, right? And they go, yes. They go, question, if that wouldn't work, What would you do? Or if that wasn't working, what would that look like?

However, your system to recruit on your own, work through internal referrals, work through your internal talent acquisition team has really provided you with the level of talent that you've needed to fill your back couple positions, right? And they go, yes. They go, question, if that wouldn't work, What would you do? Or if that wasn't working, what would that look like?

And you just try to expand and you're not necessarily providing solutions, but you're asking them to guide the conversation on what's a plan B and how would they come up with a solution to their problem? Same thing if you're in a recruiting mode. Hey, the commute would be an issue.

And you just try to expand and you're not necessarily providing solutions, but you're asking them to guide the conversation on what's a plan B and how would they come up with a solution to their problem? Same thing if you're in a recruiting mode. Hey, the commute would be an issue.

Right now, you've got a commute that is 30 minutes and it gives you the freedom to drop the kids off at daycare in the morning and your partner picks them up in the afternoon and it works out great. If you take this new job, you're going to have to rearrange because the commute's in an opposite direction, dot, dot, dot, dot. We don't offer to solve that challenge for them.