Steve Carell

Let me just check my notes.

Let me just check my notes.

Yeah, uh, yeah, I guess you're right.

Yeah, uh, yeah, I guess you're right.

From the winner's circle, I'm Stephen Colbert. And I'm Steve Carell. And this has been Even Steven.

From the winner's circle, I'm Stephen Colbert. And I'm Steve Carell. And this has been Even Steven.

You've just made me vomit in my own mouth. What's the weather like up your own ass? Tonight's topic. Dutch prostitutes. Do they deserve governmental protection? Yes. What? Yes! The Netherlands have long been known for its affordable, attractive, and gracious whores. Wait, wait, wait, wait. What are you talking about? Tonight's topic. Dutch prostitutes, yeah! No, no, no! That's not the topic.

You've just made me vomit in my own mouth. What's the weather like up your own ass? Tonight's topic. Dutch prostitutes. Do they deserve governmental protection? Yes. What? Yes! The Netherlands have long been known for its affordable, attractive, and gracious whores. Wait, wait, wait, wait. What are you talking about? Tonight's topic. Dutch prostitutes, yeah! No, no, no! That's not the topic.

The topic is stem cell research. I don't think so. Okay, I'll bite. Why is tonight's topic stem cell research? Because that's what we agreed we were gonna debate. We were gonna debate the big issue on the front of the Sunday New York Times. Exactly, yes, I've got it right here. The big, you get a shot of this? Big article right there, Dutch prostitutes. See that?

The topic is stem cell research. I don't think so. Okay, I'll bite. Why is tonight's topic stem cell research? Because that's what we agreed we were gonna debate. We were gonna debate the big issue on the front of the Sunday New York Times. Exactly, yes, I've got it right here. The big, you get a shot of this? Big article right there, Dutch prostitutes. See that?

Okay, great, fine. Gang up on Steve Day. We'll do stem cell research. I don't know what it is. I am for it. Why? You read the article, you tell me.

Okay, great, fine. Gang up on Steve Day. We'll do stem cell research. I don't know what it is. I am for it. Why? You read the article, you tell me.

Yes, that is exactly why, Steven. Because unlike someone I could name, I am not a big fan of people dying. So I say stem cell, stem cell? Stem cell. Stem cell research, yes. Neurological disorders, no. Steven?

Yes, that is exactly why, Steven. Because unlike someone I could name, I am not a big fan of people dying. So I say stem cell, stem cell? Stem cell. Stem cell research, yes. Neurological disorders, no. Steven?

Okay, here we go.

Okay, here we go.

I can't wait. Watch this, John. It's going to really blow us all away. Go ahead.

I can't wait. Watch this, John. It's going to really blow us all away. Go ahead.

Please, Steve, and that is such a load of disturbing information that if you think about it and let it sink in, you will realize that I am against stem cell research, and I dare you to try to poke a hole in my ironclad argument. Bon chance, bon vivant, bon appetit. Well, Steve, in fact...

Please, Steve, and that is such a load of disturbing information that if you think about it and let it sink in, you will realize that I am against stem cell research, and I dare you to try to poke a hole in my ironclad argument. Bon chance, bon vivant, bon appetit. Well, Steve, in fact...