Steven Setu

I said, yes, as much as I say depression is not real, and I say you've got to get up and get the fuck out of your feelings and keep moving.

It was only until recently, because my friends keep everything real with me.

And I had a friend that said, Stephen, mate, yeah, you might not be sleeping in bed.

Yeah, you might not be drinking alcohol.

Yeah, you might not be taking drugs.

You're fucking eating yourself to a grave.

And I just, that was like, whoa.

That was crazy because I feel like depression, my way of dealing with depression, one of the vices has been gluttony.

And so, yeah, I could, I stand corrected and say, so it's a bit hypocritical for me saying, you know, get out of your feelings, keep moving.

But, you know, but it's easy to say that when you're eating eight Big Macs and 12 fries and a can of Coke and for breakfast, lunch and dinner, you know.

Fuck.

I think food was the only thing that had my back.

I think food was the only thing that never hurt me.

I think I've been hurt my whole entire life, and food was the only thing that didn't hurt me, even though it did.

Every time I ate, I always had a release of endorphins and I felt happy.

And that was enough to get me through the night.

That was enough for me to outlast the storm.

But then, like everything, you realize it's actually doing the opposite.

It's gone to the point now where

I don't really emphasize that much on feelings because I think there was a huge part of my life where I did, and now I don't really emphasize on feelings.