Tamsen Fadal

That's just kind of how this works.

And anybody that tells you it doesn't maybe hasn't been through this.

The second thing, we don't just move on.

I really believe we move forward.

And I've watched not just with my mom, but with my dad losing two wives in his lifetime.

We move forward.

Those two things sound similar, but they're actually completely different.

Moving on implies leaving her behind, like, okay, chapter closed, what's next?

Moving forward allows you to know you're gonna carry that person with you into every new thing.

So my mom doesn't get smaller as my life gets bigger.

She comes with me and I think about her at every significant moment.

Like she is there, just not how I would love her to be.

The third thing, and this is one that I have leaned on.

I want you to say her name, talk about her, tell the stories.

As long as you're speaking her name and sharing who she was,

you are keeping something alive that does not have to die just because she did.

And you don't have to let go of that love in order to make room for new love too.

All those things coexist.

They really do.

And I feel like I've become living proof of that now.