Thais Gibson

And it takes, you know, they're very small exercises.

Okay, I love it.

Okay, so really good question.

So first thing is we do do that work.

Like the actual way is not going to be to will yourself through it, which unfortunately, sadly, so many people are like, oh, we're just going to try to self-silence and not say what we need.

And then it comes out in a negative way.

So first thing is you do the rewiring work.

Okay, great question.

So here's what we do in that case.

So this is actually, I would say this sometimes when working with couples where somebody's like, I'm not going to be doing the self-work.

We're not really going to be moving from that perspective.

Well, people tend to think that because people have different needs, that different needs mean mutually exclusive needs.

OK, which is not the case.

So people think like typical scenario, anxious attachment style in exactly that scenario.

You said, what do they want?

What's their need?

More time together.

What's the dismissive avoidance need?

More space, more freedom, more autonomy.

So what we do in that case is just because somebody wants more time and somebody wants more space doesn't mean that that can't work.