Tina Seelig

I don't want that to happen again.

He said, wow, you figured it out.

And I thought, how brilliant as a parent, right?

That little moment where he could have decided how he was going to respond when she was upset about failing or being disappointed or being frightened, that he basically empowered her and said, great, you figured it out.

You'll figure out the next thing.

And her confidence will be increased as a result of this.

I don't know it yet, right?

It's the yet.

I don't know it yet, but I'm on a journey to get better.

I mean, honestly, it's so funny.

I have my students create failure resumes, right?

resumes of all their biggest scripts, personal, professional, academic, but it's not good enough to just write down where you failed.

You have to write what you learned and what you're going to do differently.

And I have to tell you, when I was younger, when I was in my 20s, 30s, even 40s, I was the sort of person who would beat myself up again and again and again and again when I failed.

I mean, I was so good at perseverating around the things I was disappointed about until I started doing this.

And then it allowed me to move forward.

If I can actually process it like, okay, I spoke before thinking there and I'm kind of embarrassed.

Next time I'm going to take a beat before I say something and I'm going to be much more prepared.

And then I go, okay, tomorrow I get to do it differently.

And it allows you to move forward without constantly revisiting your failures and realize that you just haven't learned it yet.