Tom Pelphrey

The last thing I was hanging my hat on ego-wise was a relationship I had with

a woman who was very successful and beautiful and like, well, she chose me.

I bullied myself quite a bit that way too.

That's what we're doing before we know how to do anything else is just like, where is my value?

Uh, there, uh, there.

Cause those are all falling away now, but that ended.

and then i just remember being in my apartment in brooklyn at the time and just being so crushed felt so worthless and you know at that time i didn't realize what it was until later but i can articulate it now just like the constant level of this fear anxiety shame guilt it's like a buzzing constant had he boiled the frog slowly that buzzing builds slowly over time

You don't realize how deafening it had become until you're freed of it, hopefully freed of it.

So you're just in this constant state of this anxiety, almost paralysis, fear.

It's this shrunken.

Absolutely.

That's part of the problem.

Again, the awareness of it, like you just think that's normal because that's the way you've been slowly living more and more and more alike.

Out of the blue, in my apartment in Brooklyn, still to this day don't fully understand this, into my brain, read The Power of Now.

Where'd that come from?

Huh?

Yeah.

But I was like, okay, I knew I had to do it.

I'm going to do that.

But I don't know where that came from.