Ty Funny

I know what you guys were thinking.

I didn't know getting older meant I was gonna look like Alex Jones.

That ever happen to anybody?

Not even like the cool, like, making the frogs gay Alex Jones, like the sad divorced dad Alex Jones.

And I've got the documents to prove it, folks, okay?

I've got them.

I like conspiracies.

I was watching Clinton testify in front of Congress the other day, and he just had a shit-eating grin on his face the whole time.

They were like, Mr. President, do you remember where you were when those pictures were taken?

I know it's been a long time, but try to remember.

And he's like, oh, no.

I remember exactly where I was when those pictures were taken.

And it's just him and, like, Epstein and matching polo shirts, you know?

And there was a... You guys hear about the... There was supposed to be, between Donald Trump and Bill Clinton, an affair.

And, uh...

Yeah, Clinton will be in there like, I did not have sexual relations with Donald Trump.

But I think Trump, if he did it, he would have been in there the next day in a press conference like, nobody sucked Bill Clinton's dick better than Donald Trump, folks.

Nobody did it.

Nobody could do it.

I sell security systems for a living.