Unidentified

Your parents aren't going to help you.

Your parents aren't going to help you.

Do you think one of the reasons why you didn't ask for help was because it affected your dreams? Do you know what I mean? In a way, it had gotten to a part of you where nobody can go anyway but you. Right.

Do you think one of the reasons why you didn't ask for help was because it affected your dreams? Do you know what I mean? In a way, it had gotten to a part of you where nobody can go anyway but you. Right.

I do not have any memory of peaceful sleep. Feels like I read about it in a novel once. I believe that all the little secrets people keep. When you drop your guard and slumber, they come out.

I do not have any memory of peaceful sleep. Feels like I read about it in a novel once. I believe that all the little secrets people keep. When you drop your guard and slumber, they come out.

I will be totally asleep and it'll be at about three or four o'clock in the morning. I'll just bolt upright and I'm like,

I will be totally asleep and it'll be at about three or four o'clock in the morning. I'll just bolt upright and I'm like,

Then it's like a complete instant panic attack where I'm just like clutching the sheets and going, oh God, oh God, oh no, oh God, oh no.

Then it's like a complete instant panic attack where I'm just like clutching the sheets and going, oh God, oh God, oh no, oh God, oh no.

And I'll just like kind of hang on to the bed and be like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And I'm just wanting to scream.

And I'll just like kind of hang on to the bed and be like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And I'm just wanting to scream.

You're cornered. You're a trapped animal who's like, you know, sweating and waiting for its head to be chopped off.

You're cornered. You're a trapped animal who's like, you know, sweating and waiting for its head to be chopped off.

I can feel time.

I can feel time.

whizzing by and I'm trying to hold on to something generally so I usually start grabbing the walls or like clinging to the pillow and I'm like this isn't going to go away I need to hold this I need to hold on to time I need to stand in this river and just not move like it's a kind of very primitive feeling you have to like flee from this totally horrible thing that's happening to you but there is nowhere you can flee and understanding at the same time that what you're fleeing and trying to run away from is the complete cessation of you

whizzing by and I'm trying to hold on to something generally so I usually start grabbing the walls or like clinging to the pillow and I'm like this isn't going to go away I need to hold this I need to hold on to time I need to stand in this river and just not move like it's a kind of very primitive feeling you have to like flee from this totally horrible thing that's happening to you but there is nowhere you can flee and understanding at the same time that what you're fleeing and trying to run away from is the complete cessation of you

Like, normally I think you go through the day and you don't think, you don't really think you're going to die. Or it seems comforting. Like, I'm in traffic this morning. I think, oh, I might die someday. I'm like, oh, what a relief. Don't have to do this anymore. But there's something about being half asleep specifically that causes the realization to actually take effect.

Like, normally I think you go through the day and you don't think, you don't really think you're going to die. Or it seems comforting. Like, I'm in traffic this morning. I think, oh, I might die someday. I'm like, oh, what a relief. Don't have to do this anymore. But there's something about being half asleep specifically that causes the realization to actually take effect.