Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?
Welcome to Corolla Classics. I'm your host, superfan Giovanni. This is the podcast where we play the best moments, highlights, and fan-selected clips from all 17 years of The Adam Corolla Show. If you'd like to hear any of the full episodes or clips presented in these episodes, make sure to check out Adam Corolla's sub-stack, adamcorolla.substack.com.
There you'll find ad-free archives of The Adam Corolla Show, The Adam and Dr. Drew Show, as well as the podcast Beat It Out. And if you'd like to request a clip, please email us, classics at adamcorolla.com. Now on to the clips. Coming up first today, we have Adam McCrullough's show, 1538. This one's from 2015, featuring Beth Stelling, David Wilde, Gina Grad, and Brian Bishop. Check it out.
Good day, Gina Grad.
Good day to you.
And Baldwin.
Them booty shots. At Master German event with the hashtag Top Drop.
David Wild is in studio. Getting clear, Ace. Yeah, man.
Here to get clear.
Well, I'm glad you brought that up because, you know, I rarely call myself a hero.
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Chapter 2: What is the significance of the upcoming clips?
A couple of books. Now... It should have been called Getting Blown, the John Travolta story or something like that. It's the kind of thing where if we're all in a prisoner camp and one guy makes a run for it, they'll shoot him. And then if we take a week off and another guy makes a run for it, he'll get shot in the back, too, if that's the way you want to do it.
But if you all just sort of charge the gate at the same time, there's really nothing they can do. And so forever Scientology and everyone used to say, oh, you do not mess with Scientology individually.
I'm going to leave the studio now.
You do not mess with Scientology. They will fuck your shit up. They will find you. You ruin your credit. You'll see guys parked in front of your house at night and stuff like that. If you have a microphone or a camera, do not mess with Scientology. And they had a pretty good thing going for a while. Yeah, the word got around. Nobody messed with Scientology for a long time because...
Now, this is the macro version I'm trying to alert the world to is ISIS and Al-Qaeda and stuff like that. Yeah, one journalist at a time draws a picture of Allah or one guy steps up at a time or one group. But when everybody steps up at once, if everybody... did a cartoon that depicted Allah in it on the same Friday of the same day and the same month, and it just went worldwide.
There's really nothing they could do, and they wouldn't. You go first, Mace. That's what I'm saying. Let's all do it at once. And you'll see these things just sort of, they're toppled in front of you. So Scientology, whereas, again, you couldn't say a word about them back in the day, now there's movies, you know, The guy who made this film... Alex Gibney.
Alex Gibney, who was on this show some years ago, he would have had to go into seclusion after this if this was the year 2000. But, and again, I don't like to talk about myself.
You're already down this path. You might as well take this opportunity, your once-a-year opportunity.
Come on. I'll play a clip from Loveline from, was it 97? Ooh. 1997, Kennedy, the then Virgin Kennedy from MTV. This is before the Kennedy assassination? Different Kennedy. On fire. We'll just keep going forward. How about you put some weight back on? I lost the funny. Well, it's happened to more than one corpulent comedian. All right, so this is 97. All right, I will play this.
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Chapter 3: What are the implications of discussing Scientology?
Oh, that's where you read the entire letter? Yes. Oh, boy.
Does anyone have that much time, though? Well... Can I just apologize? Say, I didn't call it a cult.
I didn't? No, I really wouldn't. No, here, let me apologize. Go screw yourself, you nutballs. Hera? Yeah. Cutting edge. Yeah. 1997.
On the vanguard.
Actually, it is kind of cutting edge. Everyone else is fucking cowering about Scientology.
Exactly.
That's right. So, I've been telling everyone to fuck off for like 20 years, but no one will listen to me.
You have a long, glorious history.
But at some point it comes around and you guys join me in telling these groups that try to stifle you to fuck themselves. So let's all please do that. Can we?
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Chapter 4: What humorous comparisons are made about heroism during a flight?
Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Holding their kids. Yeah, you don't want them doing that.
You want them focusing on the smoking guy.
Like the quartet on the Titanic.
That's right. That's right. Just stealing a little focus. That's all.
Chapter 5: How does the discussion shift to the impact of smoking on air travel?
Hero.
Who's the bigger hero? That guy or the guy that turned single-handedly or single-anusly turned the plane around from Heathrow to Dubai because of the shit he took in the bathroom?
Well, sadly... We're never going to know about the hero smoker. Yeah, right. But we might if we got the flight cockpit recorder and we just heard in the background, fuck it, bitch, sit down. You know what? Hey, keep talking, cunt. I'm going to light a second one. And I got a Tipperillo ready to go, too. How do you like me now, bitch? Tipperillo. Hold on.
I'm going to go to the bathroom and tamper with, destroy, or disable the fucking lab smoke detector. How about that, bitch? I'm going to come out here and fucking dropkick that shit right down this aisle. How about that? You'd hear that in the background. And the person would become a folk, nay, smoke hero.
Chapter 6: What are the implications of celebrity health decisions discussed?
Wow.
Thank you. Thank you. Sad. Yeah.
Well, and, you know, even when, you know, in the Malaysia air and all these places, they still say for so long, well, we're still searching. We don't know if there's any survivors. They came right out and said there's no survivors.
Not this into that. Not hitting the Alps at that speed.
Usually, I thought just for PR. Sometimes they say that, but not this time.
I like... By the way, I hate it when this shit comes out of Germany. Dusseldorf. Yeah. See, out of Germany is bad. I'm going to sound like Oprah. When they do the news out of El Salvador, you kind of go... Pilot, probably drunk. You know what I mean? Chicken running around the airplane. You profile. Yeah, you start doing that. You profile.
But you hear about the, you know, the ferry turned over in the Philippines, and you're kind of like, well, it's when you have too many people hanging on the roof, you know, like shit happens. But the story out of Germany goes, oh, fuck. We're not smart. Yeah, this could easily happen here and there.
It could happen to them.
Yeah. They're pretty good at not letting that shit happen to them.
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Chapter 7: What concerns are raised about lead in imported rice?
U.S. scientists find high levels of lead in imported rice.
That's near and dear to your heart?
Well, because it's like I tell my kids when we go to Walmart, you can buy anything in the store as long as it's not made in China. Have those kids picked the pizza topping that they're into yet? Those kids, they say you haven't had them back over for pizza, so they're pissed at you. They shan't return for pizza.
Chapter 8: How do the hosts discuss parenting and pizza toppings?
Well, maybe for babysitting, though. Ryan, you play me asking Bruce's kids what they'd like on the pizza I'm about to order them.
Hey, good news, kids. It's time for pizza. You guys excited for pizza?
You know what they say? They say that story is so old. Okay, I got two more.
Shut up.
Two more interesting things.
Shut up. You know what? World, you're right. Whatever you want on your pizza topping. What is it? Let me know. I'm on the phone. Quickly.
Pizza.
No, no, no. We're getting pizza. Whatever you want on the pizza. It's your treat. Whatever you want.
Pizza.
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