Adam Carolla Show
Chloe Cole on Transitioning as a Child & Why She’s Now Warning Parents
30 Mar 2026
Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
Chapter 1: What is Chloe Cole's story and why is she warning parents?
Well, in this episode, Chloe Cole, detransitioner with a very interesting story is on. Then Andrew Hobson's got the news, and we'll do that right after this. Thanks for tuning into The Adam Carolla Show. You can watch the full show on YouTube. Just search Adam Carolla Show and hit subscribe so you never miss an episode. You can also get the podcast wherever you like to listen.
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From Corolla One Studios in Glendale, California, this is The Adam Corolla Show. Adam's guest today, activist Chloe Cole. And the news with Andrew Hobson. And now, Adam Corolla. All right, Chloe Cole is with us. She's an activist and a detransitioner, which is, boy, something I never even thought. I don't even know if I thought I would ever use that word. Didn't even know.
I don't know if that word existed several years ago. Yeah, so your story's interesting, and people are, you know, it's in the zeitgeist. The pendulum is sort of swinging back. We live in a crazy society where if you raised your hand even and thought, I'm a parent, I have twins.
You know, if your child is saying they're trapped in the wrong body and you raised your hand and started asking questions, you were pilloried and called a heretic and thrown out of the village. That's how insane our society went and maybe still has gone. But let's talk about your story. Let's start at the beginning. We'll get to now.
Well, thanks a whole lot for welcoming me on the show. I'm really happy to be on, and I'm grateful that you're giving me your platform to be able to talk about my experiences. So I'm somebody who has gone through the process of a medical and gender transition during my childhood, between the ages of 12 to 16.
I started believing that I was a boy at 12 years old after years of just being a pretty ordinary tomboy, all things considered. I liked playing video games. I liked going out into the world and adventuring, but I was also very creative. Yeah.
Are you from Northern California?
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Chapter 2: How did societal pressures influence Chloe's early beliefs about gender?
I didn't know that transgenderism was really a thing until I started using the internet. And it started with pretty innocent – Like memes and like connecting with other people across the world over like shared interest around things like rock music that I listen to or bands I like or cartoons I watch.
But there is I think now in a lot of what they call fan bases on the Internet, they've become very oriented around ideology and not just the interest around themselves or around people. Not just the interest itself. In a lot of these communities now, it's filled with these young adults and these children even who are focusing primarily on left-wing ideology.
It was through these communities where I first came to connect with other people around my interests that I started learning about things like feminism, about queer theory, and then eventually I learned about transgenderism through these other kids who were
The thing that really drew me in the most was not just like the novelty of these subjects, but knowing that these other kids were going through exactly what I was at that time, being confused about the changes of puberty and the discomfort that comes with that and not really knowing who they were until they supposedly found their true selves through the lens of transitioning.
So now you're 12 or 13 and you're starting to consider seriously transitioning.
Right. And it was never just one moment in time that I just immediately thought, okay, this is me. It was through peer influence, arguably, and seeing these other kids who were very similar to me in a lot of ways, not just superficially through our interests, but also in the things that they struggle with at home or mentally and these...
Just the normal confusion that happens around people, I would say.
How's the rest of your life working at that point? Are you playing sports? Are your grades okay? Do you have friends, your family unit intact?
I mean, my grades were good, but I... I was struggling to make friends at school. I had just moved to a new school and I was pretty much the odd one out at all times. And as much as I wanted to play sports, I was worried about – I wasn't a very coordinated kid. I didn't have a good relationship with my body for the most part in a lot of different ways. I was very sedentary.
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Chapter 3: What role did the internet play in Chloe's understanding of gender identity?
And so I thought, OK, well, I'm – I've always called myself a tomboy, but I've also always felt that maybe there was something else that was different about me. And the more that I go through puberty and the more I see my breasts developing, the more judgment people give me for it, the more uncomfortable I feel with myself. So maybe I'm not normal. Maybe I'm actually a man.
Were you ever suicidal?
I wasn't suicidal. No, I wasn't suicidal. Were you depressed? I was depressed, but I was determined to find myself a better life. That was all that I wanted. But everything started to take a turn. Once I actually started to go down the medical route of things, that was when I became suicidal for the first time in my life.
So you had to – well, I don't know that you had to. It's California. Before you started to go down the medical route – Did you have to have this discussion with your parents? Did they have to sign off on it? How was this – as a minor, I'm guessing you can't just walk into a doctor's office and start getting puberty blockers, but I don't know. It's California.
I mean – For the – as long as you're under the jurisdiction of your parents, you still need to have parental sign-off. But there are states working on laws that make it so that children can get around that.
And I think there are also – in California, children can even run away from their parents and be under the jurisdiction of the state and be able to – excuse me – get a hold of these treatments. But I – at the time, I felt like my mom and dad deserved to know that I was going through this.
Were you 13 at this point? Yeah.
Yeah, I was – well, it was just before my 13th birthday, about a month before. And I knew that I wouldn't really be able to get help for it if they didn't have any involvement. So I came clean to them. I wrote a letter to them.
And I think they actually were very sensible about it at the time considering like how little information there was that was critical of this and really talked about what this actually does to a developing body. But they never believed I was transgender. They never believed that I was a boy. And they just saw me as their beautiful little tomboyish girl who was going through a rough time.
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Chapter 4: What were the medical steps Chloe took during her transition?
And my mom and dad watching from the outside were like, okay, we're getting really frustrated with this. We are going to talk to the doctors ourselves and get to the bottom of this. And as soon as they did that, the one thing that they were told over and over again was that this was not a choice for me, that it was not a phase.
I was not going to outgrow it, that I was born a boy on some level and it was going to be They're going to have to choose between letting me persist in this feeling without intervention and eventually become so distressed about my sex that I would become at risk for suicide and take my own life. Or they could affirm me in this.
They could accept me as their son and allow me to go on this permanent – medical pathway of treatment. And they would never have said yes to the latter or any of that in a million years if it weren't for the fact that my life wasn't threatened. They weren't given any other option. They weren't given the sane option of let's take a step back. Let's help her. Let's see.
Let's assess what is really going on and help her through that while letting her grow up like any other kid.
Yeah, you know, it's kind of weird, and the left does this a lot. They glom onto these sayings or isms, you know, and so what somebody says is... you know, would you like a dead daughter or living son? And you go, uh. And they go, well, that's the option. You know what I mean? And they go, well, first off, who signed off on that? Like, they'll just go, walls don't keep people out.
They keep people in. And then everyone goes, oh, yeah. I don't know what the fuck they're talking about. Walls keep people out of places all the time, all the places. You don't want people to come in. There's a wall. But they do these idioms, and people go, oh, well, yeah, I would rather have a living son than a dead daughter. And they do this – they do it with everything. They go, these –
You know, these immigrants, they come here and they contribute more than the average American. You go, wow, that's true. But I don't know what they're basing it on. You mean people that don't pay taxes contribute more than people who do pay taxes? What are you talking about? But they they lay stuff out. They get it going. People nod their head. And then the next thing you know, it like infects.
everybody. And so then the experts who are infected say to the parents, would you like your living son or a dead daughter? And they go, oh, I don't want a dead daughter. And they go, okay, we'll sign this. And we're off and running. And at some point, it all gets debunked at some point. But when you're in it, You believe it.
Right. And especially at the time, this was almost 10 years ago now that I think about it, when my family and I were going through this. And the culture has just completely shifted from what it was then. And there was so much more awareness on the other side of this issue. But that mantra of...
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Chapter 5: What complications did Chloe experience after transitioning?
I didn't want to die. I wanted to live and I wanted to live more than ever.
Right. So they expressed this to your parents and now it's time to start treatment.
So, yes, we were referred to an endocrinologist and – About halfway through my eighth grade year was when I was given the first two prescriptions. So they gave me a drug called Lupron, which is considered to be a puberty-blocking drug. It stops the connection between the brain and the gonads, so the... So I stopped having menses. I stopped developing completely while I was on them.
And because I was already in puberty, I basically started to experience menopause. So at 13 years old, I was going through hot flashes. I was going through these like uncomfortable physical sensations. And I just felt emotionally numb while I was on them. So you can imagine it's like, okay, I want to move on to the next thing because this sucks. I want to be off of this train.
I want to be on to the next thing already and be – who I've been told I am supposed to be. And about a month after that, I got my first shot of testosterone and I took injections every week for about three, almost three and a half years. And over time, I started to look more and more like a young man. My facial structure, my bone structure started to become a little bit more chiseled.
I started to develop a lot more muscle. I started developing even like a little bit of facial hair and like just the hair everywhere on my body, like from my legs to my arms, even on the top of my head. My eyebrows just became like so much thicker. I've always had like very naturally thin hair. So it was kind of an exciting change actually.
And it was like, OK, so I'm starting to look like a young man. My voice is getting really deep. My voice sounds pretty feminine now, I think. But at a certain point in time, I actually had a deeper voice than almost all my male peers. It was kind of impressive, actually.
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Chapter 6: How did Chloe's perspective on her identity evolve over time?
Yeah, and that's the surgeries, right? But then there's all the medications as well.
Which, like, once you've already been castrated, once your sex organs have already been removed and your body can't function on its own, you're dependent on hormone administration for life. Even if you detransition, a lot of detransitioners will have to – who've already, like, been through sex reassignment will have to –
be on testosterone or estrogen for life because their bodies can no longer produce it in the amount that they need to support themselves.
So you're on testosterone, you do the puberty blockers, early menopause, that's crazy. And when are we talking about surgery?
So I started the drugs while I was in middle school. And socially, I was at a point in time where people were actually confused. I told nobody about this in school. And so it just went from one day I was looking like pretty much any other girl, maybe with shorter hair. And then over the course of a few weeks, my voice started to deepen. I started to look more like the opposite sex.
And I just – I opted not to tell anybody about it and just go into high school. And that would be when – I mean I – once I went to my freshman year, I pretty much looked and sounded like any other boy my age. And I went through most of my high school career being perceived as a young man with most people other than those who went to school with me before having no clue who I actually was.
And so I was actually accepted amongst my peers as a young man. And even though I thought that I was happy for a while.
Mm-hmm.
I mean, I was really starting to feel the burden of all this on my shoulders because I knew even deep down that I was lying to everybody around me and even myself. And every day at school, I would come back home. I would take off this binder, this compression device. I would like squish my breasts into my body to make it look like they weren't there.
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Chapter 7: What are the long-term effects of transitioning that Chloe discusses?
This is what I've been trained to do and somebody else signed off on it, so it must be okay. They're not – and I can understand what leads to that mentally because especially when you're a surgeon, you have to kind of separate the human being from the body. Otherwise, you're just thinking about the fact that you're cutting into flesh all the time.
But you can't let that override your instincts and your judgment as a doctor and as an adult.
So you get the top surgery. You're on testosterone. When does it start? You're going through high school as a boy. There's no relationships to have, I imagine. When does it start to dawn on you that maybe this was a phase versus a lifestyle?
I think the loneliness was the first thing that made me start to question everything. Yeah.
It was watching my peers start to go through relationships of their own with each other and then eventually learning a little bit more about, I think, just the human mind in general, but the way that we connect with other people and how the mind develops from infancy to adulthood and the importance of love in that process.
a psychology class of mine that led to me realizing more and more this is taking away some of the most human parts of my life and the further i go in the more that i deny myself of of all that and I can't keep going in this. It was about a year – 11 months actually after surgery. It wasn't even a year yet when one night I just broke down crying.
I think a few weeks before that, I had just had a lesson in my class about breastfeeding and the importance of that and the bond between a mother and her child. And – I just had this moment after finishing that lesson where I looked down at my chest and I can just – I was wearing a shirt, but I could visualize the scars.
And then I imagined still having breasts and having a newborn and being able to nurse my child. And that broke me. After thinking about that, I couldn't function for – for a long time. I couldn't forgive myself. I couldn't forgive my doctors. And I just, I thought my life was over at 16. I thought that I wasn't even going to make it to adulthood and that I was already ruined.
Was there a fantasy? Well, maybe not even a fantasy, but was there a plan to go, well, I'm just going to become a man and then I'll date women as a man?
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Chapter 8: What message does Chloe want to share with others in similar situations?
I didn't care. I was 19 and never really thought about ever being old, you know. So the notion that... we're doing this with people of that age is criminal to me, really. But for you, in the short time we have left, you get the top surgery. Is there a bottom surgery in the waiting plans? I mean, are we going full Monty here or what are we doing?
I think as naive as I was and as young as I was at the time, I knew that I did not want to go through that process. I knew that it was experimental and that it would never actually make me do the opposite sex. So I thought, okay, I'm not – it's not worth the risk as much as I wish I didn't have what I have.
I am not going to do that to myself and thankfully I opted to get out of it before I went to any further change and compared to a lot of my friends, I've managed to come out relatively unscathed.
Well, the top surgery is regrettable, but the bottom surgery would have to be a catastrophe. I mean, in terms of what is involved with that. One is cosmetic plus, but the other would just be a complete... You know, as much as you probably wish you never got the top surgery, not getting the bottom surgery, that is a huge bullet dodged, I would say.
Yes, and I've lost a lot. I've grieved a lot. I wish that I didn't miss out on such a critical period of my life, but I'm grateful that I didn't lose more because I've seen just how bad it can get, and I still have so much of my life ahead of me, and I've realized over the years—
I'm not alone, and I could use my experience to help other children and help other families as well as bring more national awareness around this and what is actually happening in our hospital systems.
What percentage of people regret it? Not necessarily detransition. But just sort of if they had a magic wand and they're now 25 or 30, they'd undergone the surgeries and the hormonal therapies and things like that. What percentage, you may never know, but you may take a guess, would say, I wish I was just back at 15 and never even went down that road?
So right now, we don't really have proper statistics on this because, well, a lot of the studies that are conducted around it don't really have standardized definitions of things like detransition or even regret itself. And they'll actively exclude people like me from participating in these surveys and in these studies. So they can't even get the numbers that they would actually need.
And that is on purpose, of course. The most commonly cited statistic is about 0.3%. to about 1%. But where that actually comes from is a survey where people were incentivized to take it to win like a gift card or something. So it's already, I mean, you're already biasing what kind of answers you're going to get from that alone.
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