Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?
Welcome to Corolla Classics. I'm your host, superfan Giovanni. This is the podcast where we play the best moments and highlights from all 16 years of The Adam Corolla Show. We have a companion podcast titled Corolla Classics, available exclusively through Podcast 1. Plus. Sign up and get the ad-free archives.
And if you'd like to get the ad-free archives of The Adam Corolla Show, The Adam and Dr. Drew Show, or you just want exclusive access to the brand new podcast to beat it out, make sure to check out Adam Corolla's Substack, adamcorolla.substack.com. And if you'd like to request a clip, please email us, classics at adamcarolla.com. All right, let's get to the clips.
Coming up first, we have Adam Carolla Show 2940, featuring Jim Gray, Gina Grad, and Brian Bishop. This one's from November of 2020. Check it out.
We have one, the Daily Mail. Jeffrey Toobin is fired from the New Yorker. Republican, right? Daily Mail, right-leaning. Is fired from the New Yorker weeks after being caught masturbating on Zoom call. But then if you go to the other side of the aisle...
What does Huff Poe have to say? He was wrongly accused?
He was... He... After an introspective moment, a man is fired from job. Jeffrey Toobin fired for trying to fix the wing of a butterfly.
Ha!
They're afraid of pants. New York Times says Jeffrey Toobin fired by New York by New Yorker. CNN says Jeffrey Toobin fired from New Yorker after exposing himself on a Zoom call. CBS says the same thing. Exposure incident. So all the folks at Washington Post left leaning, says Jeffrey Toobin fired by New Yorker magazine after incident. Sorry, indecent exposure investigation.
Well, they put indecent in there at least. So this is the thing with news now. So if you get your news from CNN or The New York Times or USA Today didn't say anything about masturbation or L.A. Times.
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Chapter 2: What are the highlights from Adam Carolla Show 2940?
But I thought we could do a reenactment. Who gets to be tubing on the Zoom call? I do. Oh. I get to be tubing.
It's the boss, Gina.
That's right. You two are a Mormon couple.
Okay.
And we're contemporaries.
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Chapter 3: What incident led to Jeffrey Toobin's firing?
We're the same age. Okay. And you're an old family friend of the Toobins. And it's not like we hang out, but, you know, back in the day, you're family friends. And I, Jeffrey Toobin, I'm going to an airport. I'm at the airport. And I'm catching a flight to Alaska to just kind of chill my heels. And, by the way, have some room to spread out my thighs a little, you know, get back to my first love.
Do what you're best at. I like Alaska because it's dark. 24 hours a day there, which is great. They don't talk – they talk about salmon and they talk about Kodiak bears, but they don't talk about beat-off travel. You know what I mean? Like tourism, that beat-off tourism. You know what I mean? Sure.
You hear about all the highfalutin sex tourism, like going to the Netherlands or going to Thailand or something like that. But what about the guy who loves beating off and also wants to travel? He's talking to his beat-off buddies. I'm going to the North Pole.
Oh, you lucky dog.
Yeah. Yeah. We got to watch that Al Pacino movie to figure out exactly what month it is.
Insomnia.
So you go there, you get 24 hours of darkness and the beat off production is through the roof. You know what I mean? Because when that sun is just streaming through that paper thin shade in the morning.
How are you supposed to get anything done?
You roll over, you see the picture of your son on the nightstand. I don't know why you have to travel with it, but it's there. All right. No good. So I'm going to Alaska where it's dark and I can get some beat-off time in. Also, I want to get out of the public eye. You guys were just fostering some mission stuff over in Mozambique, you know? Sure. And you had you're in a village.
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Chapter 4: How do news outlets portray the Toobin incident differently?
Carl, is that, is that Jeffrey? Oh, it's Jeffrey from the picnics.
Oh man. He's doing so well for himself. Let's ask. What a gift we were given to see him. The first person back from Mozambique. Uh, excuse me. Is Jeff Jeffrey?
Yeah. I mean, no. Oh. Bernadette. Bernadette. Bernadette and Carl. And Carl. Yeah. Oh, hey. How are you, buddy? You know, come see, come saw.
Boy, I tell you, just the guy to run into. We have been unplugged for months in a village in, of all places, can you believe it, Mozambique. I don't know what's going on, and we run into the news guy.
Oh, you are a sight for sore eyes. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah, I got to tell you, I'm a little bit down these days. I don't want to lay too much on you.
Coronavirus got you down? Yeah, we've heard about that. I can only imagine what it's like.
You know, I had a little dust up at work, and we kind of decided to part ways.
Editorial kind of thing you wanted to, you know, speak your mind on the president or something, and they wouldn't let you? Yeah.
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Chapter 5: What song references are made in the discussion?
Taylor, Baker, Jones, and Harper at the Harper Valley PTA.
What do they do? Sit around and write the song and go, I'm just out of last names?
I'm thinking she got it wrong in the singing and refused another take. Because she probably had Harper on the brain and just said Harper. Yeah. No one would write that. It was originally Schlossberg.
Mrs. Fakenbaum. But seriously, you have a song that takes place in Harper Valley. Harper is a last name, a fairly popular last name. But there's also several thousand other fairly popular last names from which to choose from. And you can't pull one more out of your ass. You get Taylor and Baker and Jones.
Chapter 6: How do the hosts critique song writing choices?
Mr. Harper couldn't see her cause she stayed too long at Kelly's bar again.
It's his valley.
If you smell Shirley Thompson's breath, you'll find she's had a little nip of gin.
And where's Shirley Thompson?
Oh, my God. You think that as a mother I'm not fit. Well, this is just a little Peyton place and you're all Harper Valley hypocrites.
All right. The point is, is there not a human being at that recording session? You can turn it down. There's not at the recording session that goes, perhaps we should just call him Mr. Johnson or Jackson or something. What do we got here? Taylor, Baker, Jones, Thompson. That's all the names we got. But I feel like between the eight of us, we could come up with a fifth name.
We could do that. I got one. Taylor.
Taylor.
No, no, Taylor's on the list. Jones. No, no. Jones is on. We've got to come up with a. Baker. No, that's. Okay, hold on a second, Sheila.
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Chapter 7: What are the social implications of celebrity behavior discussed?
You're naming names that we already have. We have to come up with another name, but it doesn't have to rhyme with anything, so it's easy. Baker. Well, what's your last name? Baker. Oh, shit. How about Valley? Oh, no. God damn it. That's not in the name already. No. Fuck. What's your last name? Wasn't given one. Oh, and you're Baker? Yeah. Fuck. Hold on. Let's ask the engineer.
Stu, what's your last name, dude?
Chapter 8: How do the hosts reflect on their personal experiences with fame?
Carl. Oh, you said last name? I said Stu. It's Stu Carl Harper. What's your last name? Hendershot. Stu, hold on. Get the other engineer on.
Carl.
Carl! Get on here. Dude, what's your last name? Thompson. Fuck! God damn it! This has been a wonderful reenactment. Toss, you didn't know where I was heading there, huh? I'm not really good at improv. No, shit. Tossed your ass right out of the fucking ground, Alex.
Goodbye, Hendershot. Goodbye, Steve Karl Hendershot.
I just thought it was just a name that wouldn't work in the song. Hendershot. I hear where we're going.
Hendershot wasn't bad.
It wasn't that bad. My point is they couldn't fucking come up with a fifth name. They had to go with Harper. Jesus Christ.
And if we're going to go with Harper, then make the song something other Valley PTA. If you need Harper in the song.
That's a good point. That's a good point. Sheila, what Valley did you grow up in?
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