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Alan Carr's 'Life's a Beach'

S10 EP18: Jane McDonald

25 May 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is the premise of 'Life's A Beach' podcast?

4.975 - 22.714 Alan Carr

Welcome to my travel podcast, Life's a Beach. Every week I invite a special guest to take us on a journey together to their favourite holiday destinations and to reveal their top travel tips and tales.

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26.795 - 40.396 Alan Carr

Don't meet your idols, they say. Ha! Here on Alanair, we say poppycock. Flying with us today is a BAFTA award-winning singer, presenter and icon who knows a thing or two about cruising.

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40.416 - 52.836 Jane McDonald

Hot on the heels of her number one album, Living the Dream, she is heading to Mighty Hoof at her headline this weekend and then touring the UK, starting in Derby on the 28th of August.

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Chapter 2: Who is Jane McDonald and what are her latest projects?

52.816 - 80.987 Jane McDonald

Oh, she's a busy queen. Tray tables down. Volume up. It's Jane McDonald! This is the final boarding call for Jane McDonald. This is the final boarding call for Jane McDonald. Can Jane McDonald please make her way to the gate? This is the final boarding call for Jane McDonald. Jane. Jane McDonald. Can you please make your... Jane. Jane. Jane.

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82.108 - 82.789 Alan Carr

Jane.

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83.309 - 85.011 Jane McDonald

Jane.

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85.031 - 95.802 Alan Carr

Jane. Jane. Thank you. Look what we've got on board. It's Jane MacDonald. How are you doing, Jane?

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95.822 - 97.684 Jane McDonald

I'm fine, love. Can I turn left?

97.704 - 103.73 Alan Carr

You always turn bloody left. You haven't seen economy for 35 years.

103.99 - 105.892 Jane McDonald

Well, no, I'm right.

106.033 - 107.194 Alan Carr

No, because you're on a bloody boat.

107.434 - 107.494

Ha!

Chapter 3: What travel experiences does Jane McDonald share?

119.35 - 121.553 Jane McDonald

And I did, and I was. So there you go.

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121.833 - 127.701 Alan Carr

Oh, wow. I've wanted you on this show for blooming years. And finally you've arrived. I don't know what to say.

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127.921 - 128.842 Jane McDonald

Oh, bless you.

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129.283 - 130.765 Alan Carr

I'm gobsmacked.

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130.745 - 134.29 Jane McDonald

You shouldn't be. It's only me. We go back so long.

134.31 - 158.587 Alan Carr

We do. We do. And you very kindly came to see me in Blackpool. I did. Oh, you're so sweet. I love it. You are a genuine national treasure. Oh, that's very kind of you. And eagle-eared listeners at home will know that I'm slurring a little bit. But I have had quite a boozy lunch because I have been nominated for two BAFTAs. Oh, wow. Most memorable moment with the Traitors. Yes.

158.827 - 183.419 Alan Carr

And Alan and Amanda's Greek job. That's a hard one. Alan and Amanda. Alan and Amanda. And then I do this sitcom called Changing Ends. Amazing. And the boy who plays me is up for Best Actor. So I've had a bit and I'm all... So I'm a little bit emotional. Yes, you should be. And I've got Jane Macdonald on me playing. Oh, congratulations. That's incredible.

183.52 - 195.963 Alan Carr

And you've got a BAFTA as well, haven't you? I have got a BAFTA, yes. It's amazing, isn't it, when you get... Yeah. I feel like Alan and Amanda's show, it's got that same warmth and authenticity that you have. That's why people love you, you know.

196.264 - 199.578 Jane McDonald

Right back at you. Yeah, we're real love. That's what they're like.

Chapter 4: How does Jane McDonald feel about her recent BAFTA nominations?

296.315 - 316.81 Jane McDonald

Really? Yeah, because when I walked in on this wall of all the albums that had been recorded in this studio, and those like Taylor Swift, Coldplay, Garth Brooks, Reba McEntire, Dolly Parton. And I'm thinking, what am I doing in here? You know, because you do, you know, we get imposter syndrome quite a lot.

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317.031 - 341.27 Jane McDonald

And then the musicians came in and I had the producers there and I was exec on it because it's my label. And I just heard them striking up one of our songs that we'd written. And it sounded so good. And I just thought, that's my song. That's my song that I wrote in Nashville at the Blackbird studio. And it was incredible.

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341.411 - 349.245 Jane McDonald

And I really got overwhelmed because it's taken all this time to realise that I should have been a country singer all along. Ah!

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349.748 - 370.491 Alan Carr

Because is it true you're bringing out Jane McDonald, Nashville? You've got her on Channel 5? That's right. Wow. Because when you listen to the album, you've got Living the Dream, you've got The Next Chapter, you've got Don't Mind If I Do. There is a feistiness there. And when you listen to the lyrics, it's about grabbing like, can I say by the testicles? Yes, you can.

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370.471 - 378.163 Alan Carr

And I feel like when I see Pole to Pole on Channel One, that's you sort of coming into your own. Do you feel like a kind of confidence now?

378.364 - 387.238 Jane McDonald

Yeah, I do. This is a chapter that I've never felt, one, this happy, this confident, this sort of secure.

387.599 - 391.585 Alan Carr

You can tell in the music and when you're on the telly and everything.

391.565 - 400.418 Jane McDonald

It's just a wonderful, wonderful place to be right now. And, you know, life throws ups and downs at us all the time. Oh, my God, yeah. I know, love. We could talk.

400.438 - 401.239 Alan Carr

We need a brew.

Chapter 5: What insights does Jane provide about her upcoming tour?

526.198 - 526.919 Alan Carr

Want to sound like that?

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527.36 - 537.324 Jane McDonald

I'm a... There's some beautiful people out there. And I'm at that age now where I can just look and admire and not have to come off.

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537.344 - 542.149 Alan Carr

Oh, I'm not. I want to touch. I want to try before you buy.

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542.169 - 547.135 Jane McDonald

Oh, bless you. Oh, I'm over all that. I'm over all that and it's lovely.

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547.455 - 549.658 Alan Carr

I just go, oh, look at that.

549.718 - 553.342 Jane McDonald

You know, like you do. Put my knitting down.

553.382 - 560.631 Alan Carr

Smashing. So you are sort of running out of places to go, aren't you, on your cruise ships? Is there anywhere you haven't been?

560.931 - 570.443 Jane McDonald

Well, yeah, there's loads of places, really. I haven't been to Hawaii. I haven't done the South Pacific. I haven't done China. So Thailand, I haven't been there.

570.463 - 581.416 Alan Carr

So there's quite still quite a lot to do. Amazing. So, yeah. So, listen, we've got to talk about your travel. Now, me and you have sort of been on holiday together-ish.

Chapter 6: What are Jane's thoughts on the cruise industry?

638.14 - 638.541 Alan Carr

I know.

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638.641 - 643.209 Jane McDonald

I know. And there were you and me. And then it wasn't Gok on the flight.

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643.229 - 657.755 Alan Carr

Gok. Yes. Yeah. Oh, what a... Can you imagine that? I know. If that plane went down, imagine the gay community. Devastation. Honestly. Well, let's not say who might get the bigger write-up in the obituaries. Let's not.

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658.296 - 661.401 Unknown

Now, don't be a traitor.

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661.501 - 661.561 Alan Carr

Oi!

661.581 - 668.773 Jane McDonald

You've got something on your face. Oh! Do you know what? When I saw you do that, I thought, he's my mate, he could do that to me.

668.753 - 686.216 Alan Carr

I don't. Everyone asks me, oh, do you hate Paloma? I love Paloma. I know, you do. But I was desperate. What can I do? It's called The Traitors. It's not tipping point or like, you know what I mean? Or The Chase. That's true, love. That's true. So, what did you think of Venice? Did you like it?

686.236 - 693.646 Jane McDonald

I loved it, yeah. You know, and we did sort of the local things, you know, like Harry's Bar and, you know, the square.

693.967 - 694.347 Alan Carr

Yeah.

Chapter 7: How does Jane McDonald handle unexpected travel challenges?

806.483 - 815.555 Jane McDonald

And the jelly, oh, it's lovely. Oh, the jelly. Oh, their pork pies are second to none. Do you reckon they'll sponsor this podcast? Hey, they might do now. You never know.

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815.836 - 822.184 Alan Carr

Alan Pork Pies. Yeah. The jelly. Oh, it's right lovely. Oh, you bastard.

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822.164 - 844.83 Jane McDonald

come to wakefield but we have got some great places we've got new miller dam we've got new miller i can't believe i'm doing this uh we've got new miller people want a holiday in england i think no one mentions wakefield but i've been there there's things to do and things to see there is there is uh we've got new miller dam which is a beautiful beauty spot where you can walk around and it's

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844.81 - 856.131 Jane McDonald

And then we've got the Pugneys Lake, which is also lovely. Yeah. Have a nice walk round there. We've got all sorts of things in Wakefield. A sandal castle, that's beautiful. Oh, that's like a ruin though, isn't it?

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856.151 - 857.173 Alan Carr

Yeah, it is. Sandal castle.

857.233 - 858.435 Jane McDonald

Wood suit DIYer.

858.635 - 860.378 Alan Carr

Yeah, maybe me and Amanda can do it.

860.399 - 861.2 Jane McDonald

Yeah, you should do.

861.581 - 865.107 Alan Carr

Al and Amanda's sandal job. Nice. Lovely, it's got a ring to it.

Chapter 8: What are Jane's favorite travel destinations and why?

1139.937 - 1140.878 Alan Carr

You've got to do Blackpool.

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1140.898 - 1145.524 Jane McDonald

I know. So we're doing Opera House there. Belfast, we're going to Belfast.

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1145.805 - 1167.838 Alan Carr

That waterfront hall? Yeah. Oh, I love that. I performed there and there was a fire alarm halfway through. No. There's nothing worse than standing there with your... I talk about mystique going out the window when you're there in a car park with the whole audience. Nice. Hello, Alan. Can I have a photo? Yes, of course. What are you going to say in the next bit? Well, wait and see.

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1167.878 - 1172.169 Alan Carr

Just wait for the fireman to actually leave the venue.

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1172.289 - 1175.277 Jane McDonald

I bet you did that on purpose so the fireman would turn up.

1175.297 - 1198.159 Alan Carr

I know, I wasn't getting a laugh. I was like, fuck that. It's like headbutting it. I love that. So listen, tell me somewhere. Now, we're not going to name and shame, but has there been anywhere that hasn't sort of lived up to your expectations? This is not a nasty podcast. We're not trying to name and shame. But is there anywhere you've gone that you've been like, hmm?

1199.422 - 1227.202 Jane McDonald

No, I don't think there is, but I always see the best in where I'm going. And I do love adventure. Yeah. And, of course, we've got researchers who go out and find all these amazing places for us. So I just turn up. I usually see the bins first. I mean, I've never seen a glamour. Yeah, honest to God, I don't know what this is. You see the bins? Yeah. I just seem to be near the bins all the time.

1227.984 - 1247.845 Jane McDonald

I go into a theatre, I've got to go in the back door, which is by the bins. I go into HMV, I go in by the bins. So it's just not right. My life just smells like a bin. LAUGHTER You know, the Queen, it smelt like paint because there was always somebody ten foot in front of a painting. Mine is the bins.

1247.865 - 1273.647 Alan Carr

Well, I wouldn't put that on your posters. No, I'm not going to. Jane MacDonald, live at the Palladium. All I can smell is bins. It's got a ring to it. Do you know what? Copyright that, love. No, really. Yeah, it's true. Because you actually say on the show and also on your website as well, I am an explorer who thought that this girl from Wakefield would be an explorer. But you do.

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