Show notes
I'm Not Good Enough Where'd That Come From? In this slightly longer Five-Minute Quickie, we're digging into one of the sneakiest, most stubborn beliefs so many of us carry around: "I'm not good enough." Where did it come from? Why does it stick? And how do we uncover what's really underneath it? This FMQ is all about preparing you for the deeper dive coming in the next longer episode, where I'll be guiding you through a process to change this belief for good. But first, we need a seed — a direction — so when we get there, your unconscious mind is already lined up and ready to shift. What We Explore Today How "I'm not good enough" often starts with something very specific. Why a general belief always has a more personal root underneath it. The types of life experiences where this message gets planted. How your unconscious mind tries (clumsily!) to protect you with limiting beliefs. A gentle exercise to uncover the real identity belief below the surface. Your Mini-Mission Before we get to the long episode: Notice the feeling of "I'm not good enough." Keep the intensity no higher than a 5 out of 10. Ask: "I'm not good enough because I'm…?" Let the deeper belief rise — something identity-level like "I'm stupid," "I'm invisible," "I'm useless." Just notice it. No fixing today — just understanding. This gentle curiosity will set you up beautifully for the transformation we'll create together next week. Don't Miss the Next Episode That's where we take this seed, this awareness, and change the belief at the unconscious level. Not with willpower. Not with talking. But with a real process. Share with your friends so we can all make this change together https://personaldevelopmentunplugged.com/fmq-520-im-not-good-enough-whered-that-come-from Shine Brightly 🌟 Paul Hey there! I'd love to hear from you—questions, feedback, requests—all welcome. Drop me a line or leave a comment. If you've enjoyed this episode or any other, please share and subscribe! You can reach me at [email protected]. Subscribe to the Podcast Ready to subscribe? Click here to explore your options. Or, if you're on Apple Music or iTunes, you can go straight to subscribe or leave a review here. Special Programs for You For tools on developing Supreme Inner Confidence, finding Freedom from Anxiety, or specialized Hypnosis Tracks, visit PaulCloughOnline.com. Free Hypnosis Tracks Want access to my FREE hypnosis tracks? Head over to paulcloughonline.com/podcast. Connect with Me Follow me on Twitter: @pcloughie Remember: I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. This podcast and any of my online resources are for educational purposes only. Never use the hypnosis tracks or exercises if you're operating machinery, driving, or if you have epilepsy or psychiatric conditions. Always consult a healthcare provider if you're unsure. Find Us on Other Platforms Catch the podcast on Spotify, Castbox, iHeart Radio, YouTube, or on our Libsyn page. Stay tuned, and keep shining brightly. ✨ Music Credits Music by Wataboi from Pixabay, Music by DreamHeaven from Pixabay, Music by ccjmusic from Pixabay, Music by freegroove from Pixabay, Music by prazkhanal from Pixabay. And the transcript WARNING if you're a lover of the written word this may make you frustrated, or angry - you have been warned - is it an 'ism FMQ520 I'm Not Good Enough Where'd That Come From Hey, this five-minute quickie, I'm not good enough. Where did that come from? Slow down, Paul. Where did that come from? And we're going to go there, we're going to just have a little look at this to see where this belief of I'm not good enough, oh, you know, I don't deserve it, or, you know, I have to be a perfectionist, a perfectionist, I don't know why I said that. But just that, I think we've all got a belief like I'm not good enough. And the I think it comes from something else, something more specific. And when we look at the specific and understand it, guess what, sometimes it just disappears. And the thing is, that's what we're going to do. This is, again, a FMQ with a difference. Because it's not just me rambling, although it is a bit. It's all about working out something. So we're prepared for a longer podcast. And in that longer podcast, we can then dive more deeply into that subject and allow it to disappear, come up with a process. So this is what we're going to do. I'm not good enough. Where did it really come from? Now, a lot of you and me, we've just been told it. You've just been told it, you've been told it by your family, maybe members of your family. Sometimes when we think back, we can remember being told, you're just not good enough, you'll never make it. I know I was told that one time about I wanted to be an artist. I don't think I was ever going to be that good. But I had a dream to be an artist. And guess what, I was told, oh, there's so many good artists that don't make it, and you're never going to make it. Now that had more than just the effect of saying, oh, well, you know, I'm not gonna be an artist. It did create negative beliefs in my life, which I've changed now. I've changed. And you can because you can change all negative beliefs, by the way, even a core belief, identity belief, we can change them. So don't worry about that. Where else have you been told it? Have you thought about school? Now, what were you told at school? My son, Joseph, is a perfect example for this. He was told at his, I think it was his last year of primary school, before going on to big school. He was asked to stand up in class and answer a question. And he got embarrassed. He got nervous and couldn't answer and was told by the teacher, well, if you can't answer this, Joseph, you'll never make it in the big school. And he struggled. He really struggled to to go through big school. I didn't know this at the time. He told me later, but he really struggled. But the thing is, never make it. What a load of bollocks that is, because he now is changing people's lives, or helping change. He doesn't do it specifically. He is a facilitator for changing people's lives. And he does it online. He's got millions of downloads. He runs such a successful online mastermind group, as it were. It's a mastermind family that changes, has a whole set of modules of helping people change their core issues, negative core issues, to come out the other side and enjoying their dreams, creating their dreams. He has a wonderful set of hypnosis tracks, far bigger than mine. Oh, it's massive. One of the biggest online. Joseph Clough hypnosis. You have to listen to that and see if you can tell what happened when he was a child, because he has changed. What else? Maybe friends. Maybe those bloody kids having a, you know, bullying. I remember working with a guy who got bullied so much. That he just couldn't talk to people. And how did it affect him? Well, he couldn't talk to his daughters. We had to do some work on that. But when we changed that belief about not being able to talk, oh, he changed. And he didn't just change with his daughters. He changed in his work. He changed everything in his life. He had an inner confidence, as it were. What else? Well, you see, sometimes it's your unconscious mind. Your unconscious mind chooses for you to have a belief of, I'm not good enough, or something just before that, that morphs or generalizes into, I'm not good enough. Something happens when you're younger and your unconscious mind goes, I don't like this for you. I want to protect you from it. And it gives you a feeling. It gives you a negative belief, a limiting belief that over time, it uses in different areas of your life, not the same type of problem, but similar problems. And therefore the generalizes into, I'm not good enough from a specific to a general. And if you work on that general, you'll get a general result. And for you, I want a specific result. Because when you let go of the specific issue, all the effects have to disappear too. They just disappear. So what I want you to do is when you're thinking of, I'm not good enough, I want you to think of examples. Not 10 out of 10, if 10 is the worst, not being, I don't feel it at all, but a five, five out of 10, because this is just exploratory. And what I want you to do is think, go back in, in your memories. You find that feeling of I'm not good enough. And with that feeling, imagine being just drawn back into the past, just a little bit, make sure it's a five, no more five out of 10. Just drawn back to think of times when you just didn't feel good enough. It was, that was an event that made you feel this way. But when you're there, just feel that feeling. And maybe you'll find the cause of it. The very first time you felt that way. And you see, when you get to that very first time, you tend to find there's a different emotion there. It could be fear, could be embarrassment. That's been generalizing to, I'm not good enough, because you can see how it would, wouldn't you over time. But just spend a little time doing that. Say, I am saying over and over again, nothing more than a five out of 10. Because I don't want you to go on a, on something which is traumatic and go back in the past, because that's a fucking no, no, you don't do that. There's plenty of other processes that we can do that doesn't need that at all. This is just following I'm not good enough back. And it's just curiosity. See if I can find the cause of I'm not good enough. But the thing is, here's the thing. If you're, if you do that, and you find the cause, great, you got an idea, you got an idea where it came from. But here's the thing. If you didn't, or you think, oh, I don't really want to do that. I don't want to go back in time. No worries. Got you covered. Because I can do it in any way, shape or form. Because that's what we do here. So how do you do it? This part is just right for you. Or if you didn't find this just right for you. I want you to start with that general belief. I'm not good at, or whatever it is for you. I don't belong here. It's that you can imagine it's like an umbrella belief. But and it covers different areas. And that's how it's generalized. So start with that. And as you think about it, you'll get that emotion. Yeah. So I'm not good enough. I shouldn't be here. I don't belong. Whatever it is. You fill in the blank and get that feeling. Where is it in your body? Where exactly is it in your body? And put your hand on it. I always tell my clients, I ask, where'd you feel that feeling? Oh, I feel it here, Paul. I feel it in my gut. So put your hand on it. Because when you put your hand on it, you're selling your unconscious mind. Not only the feeling, I know where it is. Here it is. You're having a dialogue now, communication with your unconscious mind. And as you feel the feeling, and this is, this is the thing. Feel the feeling now. Feel the feeling and say, I'm not good enough because I'm, and keep asking that. I'm not good enough because I'm, I'm not good enough because I'm, and what'll happen as you get into that feeling, keep thinking of that feeling, is to ask your unconscious mind, I want to find the cause of this belief, the real belief that's underneath it. I'm not good enough. Feel the feeling because I'm, and it'll be something like, I'm stupid. I'm useless. I should be invisible. Something like that. And it'll have I in front of it because it's an identity belief. And that's what I say, we can change beliefs about our identity, easy and effortlessly, but you've got to find them first. When you think about it, and it comes up, and I've had so many times when I've worked with people and they are so good at what they do, yet they have this feeling of not good enough. And when we go back, they go, oh, actually, Paul, I'm stupid. And I can now remember being told that by certain people. And I can remember, not necessarily a specific event, but it being there, and it makes so much sense now. I can see how my unconscious mind didn't like that and has protected me. And things like made me want to be a perfectionist, had to try super hard. Now, the thing is, with you trying super hard when you're like that, because of the fear, the fear of failure, the fear of being an embarrassment or being embarrassed, the fear of just standing out in a not a good way, failing. And we know there's no failure by any feedback, but at the time, we think it's failure. And our unconscious mind makes us, to protect us, gives us this feeling, I'm not good enough. Or I'm stupid and generalise into things like I'm not good enough. And it makes you want to be a perfectionist or just protect you to make sure you do that. And then it gets overwhelming. And because of that, it then spreads into other areas of life. But now we've got it. And what we're going to do when we got it, you got to listen to the longer podcast. Because this is like selling the seed, I just want you to explore, be curious. Where did this come from? I'm not good enough. I don't belong here. That type of thing, you fill in the blank. And then we find that belief that just below the surface. And you'll know it. Because it's like that thing where you just get that intuition, I can't even say the bloody thing, intuition, where you go, this feels right. I don't know how it how I know it's right. It just feels right. And now we've got a grasp of it. And we're going to take it and change it. But just sometimes understanding it, it'll disappear. Because you can go, Oh, I can see how my own contrast wanted to try to protect me. But now we're going to find a better way. And that's where we go with the longer podcast. Okay. So that's where it came from. Look out for the longer podcast, because that's where we're going to let it go. Okay. So until then, remember to subscribe, remember to share, do all of this stuff. And I'll see you in the longer podcast. Have fun. See you soon. Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai. Go Unlimited Personal development [Unplugged] [podcast][NLP][Hypnosis][self development]self improvement][awareness]