What makes a home look quietly elegant… and what makes it look like a Cheesecake Factory in disguise? In this episode, Kiki Astor breaks down the common, supposedly “old money” decorating elements that actually cheapen a house when done wrong. From blinding white exteriors and shiny DIY lacquer walls to overdone marble countertops in modern farmhouse McMansions and Greek columns that aim to make a 60's ranch-style home look like a neo-Palladian estate but instead fall painfully flat, Kiki explains why these popular choices fail — and how true old money interiors whisper rather than scream. Drawing on the lessons of icons like Billy Baldwin, Tony Duquette, Bunny Mellon, Nina Campbell, and Ralph Lauren, she reveals the timeless principles of proportion, context, and patience that create authentic elegance. But don't worry if your home was built in this decade rather than inherited from Gilded Age great-grandparents, we have some savvy budget-minded tricks in this episode that will surprise you- and even some shocking hacks that you won't believe. Expect sharp insights, a few scandalous design confessions, and plenty of cheeky etiquette along the way, including working with a friend who is a decorator. Whether you’re dreaming of old money style, redecorating on a budget, or just curious about the fine line between tasteful and tacky, this episode is your field guide to avoiding the most common “new money” décor mistakes.

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“What did the council decide on item 42?” — answered with the speaker and the moment.

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