back from the borderline
Episodes
nick fuentes and the cult of irony
18 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This preview of a Patreon-exclusive episode breaks down exactly how Nick Fuentes functions as a media figure and why his influence persists despite ba...
when you’re done being the good daughter
16 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode examines what happens when the instinct to please, fix, and perform finally breaks down. It’s an archetypal investigation into three ro...
how to ACTUALLY stop giving a f**k about what people think of you
11 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This is what it actually takes to stop caring what people think. For real this time.Every person who grew up managing the reactions of parents, partne...
how AI is rewiring the human psyche
09 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
AI isn’t abstract anymore. It’s showing up in the deepest parts of our lives People are using it at the exact moments they used to reach for a jou...
the female market, part 2: the cost of freedom
04 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This is part two of our investigation into the market built around women’s bodies and the systems that keep that market running. Be sure to listen t...
the female market, part 1: the price of desire
02 Dec 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This is a two-part investigation into the market built around women’s bodies and the systems that keep that market running. From there, the episode ...
the occult truth about heartbreak
27 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
What if your heartbreak was an initiation?This episode explores heartbreak as an occult process that remakes you from the insight out. We examine lime...
the holy grail and the lost wisdom of the west
25 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
For centuries, the Holy Grail has been treated as a Christian relic or a medieval myth. But the Grail is far older than this, and its meaning was neve...
how we all became a little satanic
20 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The popular image of Satanism belongs to horror movies, pentagrams, and black candles, but the real influence sits in work culture and the chase for p...
digital scapegoats and the ritual of outrage
18 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
One single mistake online can set off a collective judgment that moves faster than thought itself. A name starts to trend and a crowd quickly forms ar...
the unhappy woman: against the cult of calm
13 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Your unhappiness is sacred data.The woman who refuses to smile has been treated as a problem for millennia. Ancient Greeks blamed her wandering womb. ...
the age of AI slop and the birth of a new renaissance
11 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
AI is changing how culture gets made, and it's happening fast. Text, images, and ideas... all produced faster than anyone can actually think about the...
the magician who invented the modern world: john dee and the lost birth of science
06 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
John Dee built the blueprint for modern intelligence long before the word “scientist” even existed. He mapped stars while designing encryption sys...
the IFS takedown: my unfiltered response to the psych industry’s victory lap
04 Nov 2025
Contributed by Lukas
When New York Magazine dropped its viral feature “The Therapy That Can Break You,” in The Cut on October 30th, 2025, the internet exploded with ho...
the world isn't real (and why that might actually be a good thing)
30 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
For thousands of years, philosophers, mystics, and scientists have whispered the same unsettling possibility: what if reality itself is a mirage? From...
dark enlightenment: the forbidden philosophy behind the tech elite
28 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It’s a strange and somewhat terrifying timeline we’re living through. Peter Thiel has begun giving lectures about the Antichrist, while Sam Altman...
when stillness feels dangerous (hypervigilance as a religion)
23 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We live in bodies that don’t know how to rest. Even when the room is quiet, our nerves stay braced for impact. Always ready to defend, explain, and ...
enchantment in the age of disenchantment w/ dr. teddy hamstra
21 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Modern life teaches us to doubt what we can’t measure. Yet, across history, people have witnessed things that refuse to fit the frame - mystical enc...
trauma fossils: when survival becomes a ghost in the soul
16 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It’s possible that some part of you still wakes each day prepared for impact. You snap in anger before you even understand why. A small comment feel...
the hidden AI system monitoring your emotional state
14 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You're talking to ChatGPT like you always do. Maybe asking it to help you work through something personal or just having a casual conversation with a ...
the alchemy of sleep and how your roots decide what you dream
09 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Most people chase their dreams by focusing purely on the mind. They track every symbol and obsess over dream dictionary interpretations. The deeper st...
aleister crowley: the man, the myth, the shadow
07 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Aleister Crowley is one of the most mythologized figures in modern history. He’s been called a prophet, a fraud, a genius, a junkie, a saint, and a ...
ufo disclosure bombshell [part 2]: why masculine thinking is killing disclosure
02 Oct 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We’ve been going in circles on this stuff for a long time now. Despite decades of witness testimony, leaked documents, and official acknowledgments,...
why i hope we're living in a simulation
30 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You've heard the simulation hypothesis before. That cold, depressing idea that we're probably just code running on some alien computer, meaningless NP...
the ufo disclosure bombshell [part 1]: human trafficking in black programs exposed
25 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Alleged leaked text messages between a Senate Intelligence Committee staffer and a military whistleblower have been circulating through UFO research c...
occult statecraft: how demons, magicians, and intelligence agencies shaped the modern world
23 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
WARNING: This episode will permanently alter how you view government institutions, scientific establishments, and the people who actually run this cou...
everything we now call "drugs" used to be how humans touched god
18 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Your ancestors knew something about consciousness that we've systematically forgotten, and there are powerful reasons why this knowledge was buried.I'...
anomalies, intuition, and the edge of what we know with jeffrey mishlove, PhD
16 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
He’s the only person to ever receive a doctoral degree in parapsychology from an accredited university (UC Berkeley, 1980). He hosted the original T...
the forgotten codes of love i'll teach my daughter [part 2]
11 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
While Part 1 revealed the exoteric truths of relationship patterns, Part 2 unlocks the esoteric mysteries that have been hidden in plain sight for cen...
the forgotten codes of love i'll teach my daughter [part 1]
09 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You've been dating the same person in different bodies your entire life. It's time to stop settling for scraps of affection and start demanding the de...
your pain is real but your suffering is a story
04 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Your shoulders and jaw have been tight for months. Shit, maybe for your entire life. You wake up already thinking about the thing that might go wrong ...
why medieval witches and modern alien experiencers are describing the same thing
02 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Everything you believe about witch trials, UFO encounters, and alien abduction experiences might be fundamentally wrong. These seemingly unrelated phe...
when magick went underground
28 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You possessed knowledge as a child that you were systematically taught to abandon. You perceived realities that adults insisted did not exist. Every c...
religious trauma and the silent toll on female emotional development (a roundtable with stephanie ann and alyssa grenfell)
26 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode brings together two former members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Stephanie Ann and Alyssa Grenfell) for a direct co...
the 1000-year-old tibetan secret that makes western psychology look like child's play
21 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Discover the ancient Tibetan practice of Chöd that's revolutionizing how we approach inner work, trauma healing, and shadow integration. While Wester...
selective spiritual technophobia: why mystics and scientists are both getting AI wrong
19 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Why are so many spiritual teachers and thinkers panicking about AI? Some are calling it demonic, while others say it’s the Antichrist, but almost no...
why shadow work is making you worse
14 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You've been doing everything right. Journaling about your triggers. Embracing your darkness. Loving your inner demons. Yet somehow your anxiety is wor...
meme magic, hot mess eras, and digital disappearance with aiden arata
12 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
If you’ve spent any time on Instagram’s weird, wonderful and niche corners, chances are high that you’ve seen one of Aiden Arata’s memes. Her ...
the death of the people-pleaser: how self-abandonment becomes a survival strategy
05 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is a deep dive into the psychological, spiritual, and mythic roots of people-pleasing and why this pattern exists in the first place. We ...
TDC_21: the secret sauce to awakening? paradox.
02 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
There are some episodes that meet you where you are. This is not one of those. This episode is for those standing at the threshold where healing ...
cutting the cord, keeping the thread: how to stop repeating your parents’ coping mechanisms in adult life
31 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Family dynamics shape us long after we’ve left home, but not always in ways we can see. This episode examines what happens when we internalize ...
why age gap relationships aren’t normal: grooming, power, and emotional maturity
29 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Age-gap relationships have been romanticized, normalized, and quietly accepted across pop culture, media, and even personal memory. But at what cost?&...
the emotional cost of always being available (why you’re drowning in unread messages)
24 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In a world where the day begins with blinking notifications and ends with unanswered messages, many of us are carrying an invisible weight. This episo...
you can’t domesticate venus: sex, power, and the archetypes running your life with dr. laurence hillman
22 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Psychological astrologer Dr. Laurence Hillman returns to the podcast for a rare, unfiltered conversation on desire, danger, and the archetypal forces ...
your whole childhood wasn’t bad: the danger of “all-trauma” narratives
17 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Many of us find healing through learning about trauma - especially childhood emotional neglect, dysfunctional family systems, and the lasting impact o...
disordered desire: performing connection, numbing pleasure, forgetting yourself
15 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Desire is meant to be a creative force. Something within us that fuels connection, expression, intimacy, and imagination. But for many of us, that for...
what they're hiding about your mind
10 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, we explore the deeper truths that may be hiding beneath the surface of today’s “Disclosure” discourse. While headlines focus on...
why psychiatry failed her: laura delano on misdiagnosis, medication, and coming back to life
08 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
What is the cost of being a “good patient”? For Laura, it was nearly her life.Join me as I sit down with Laura Delano, author of the groundbreakin...
the real reason you’re afraid of the devil (you’re possessed, and it looks nothing like the movies)
03 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode plunges into the most feared symbols in the Western imagination: Lilith, Lucifer, the Devil, the Serpent, and the Dragon, and asks what w...
the psychology of love island USA S7: why it broke the internet (and what it says about us)
01 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This is an in-depth psychological breakdown of Love Island USA Season 7, one of the most viral and culturally polarizing seasons in the franchise’s ...
you’re NOT crazy, you’re remembering the real world.
26 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We’ve all had moments that totally flipped our idea of reality on its head. Maybe it was an image from a dream that stayed with you for weeks, a phr...
why personality ISN'T a prison (unless you let it be)
24 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
If you were to believe the dominant frameworks of modern psychology, psychiatry, and popular self-help, you might assume that personality is a fixed s...
what you're calling a breakdown might be a dark baptism
17 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Some people call it a breakdown. Others call it trauma. But when you look closely, these moments often follow a pattern. These moments come at a thres...
let them cook: shadow work, shame, and the stew of self
12 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You’ve probably seen the phrase: let him cook. It gets used online when someone’s deep in a process that looks weird from the outside. Messy, mayb...
dancing with the devil part 2: the return (how to grow the f*ck up and quit calling red flags soulmates)
10 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This is Part Two of a two-part series. In Part One, we talked about what it feels like to override your gut instinct and confuse danger with connectio...
motherhood as death ritual (a rite of passage for women with or without children)
05 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is not just for mothers. It’s for any woman who has ever felt the pull to grow up — psychologically, spiritually, mythically — and ...
dancing with the devil part 1: the descent (why you keep ignoring your gut instinct and mistaking danger for ‘chemistry’)
03 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Cassie Ventura recently testified against Sean “Diddy” Combs, and as the coverage picked up, so did the usual commentary. People are asking the sa...
psychic hygiene in the age of AI
29 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
If you’ve been feeling scattered, foggy, or emotionally off after using AI tools or spending time online, you’re not imagining it. There’s somet...
unlearning toxic shame through sacred speech (a guided journey)
27 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this guided experience, you’ll walk through an original five-part rite designed to help you become aware of the inherited language that shapes yo...
chatGPT told him he was god (what no one’s saying about AI and spiritual delusion)
22 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In recent weeks, headlines have begun to surface that feel pulled straight from dystopian fiction. One Rolling Stone article, published May 4th, 2025,...
are you emotionally feral?
20 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
What happens when no one teaches you how to feel safe with other people? When no one shows you how to speak your needs, regulate your emotions, or com...
why you reject the love you crave (emotional maturity, trauma, and learning to receive)
15 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You might think you’re just protecting your peace. You might say you have high standards now. That you’ve outgrown certain people. That if someone...
healing the christian wound: empire, myth, and the pattern beneath it all
13 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
There are wounds that don’t show up in diagnoses or clinical language. The kind that live in the silence after a question you weren’t supposed to ...
the death of celebrity culture is here (and why it's good for your mental health)
08 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Katy Perry kissed the ground after spending a mere three minutes in space. The headlines framed it as some kind of feminist milestone. The internet di...
emotional alchemy: a guide for when everything falls apart
06 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is spoken map for the ones unraveling, awakening, and becoming, one threshold at a time. You might be here because you’re exhausted by ...
how to surrender to the mystery and let go your need for certainty
01 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We’ve been taught to search for answers. Constantly trying to understand the world, to control it, to make sense of the chaos. But what if the searc...
what does AI believe? (the hidden soul inside the machine)
29 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
When we talk about artificial intelligence, the focus is usually on headlines: Will it take our jobs? Can it be trusted? Is it dangerous? But what if ...
nobody's watching. nobody cares. you're free now.
24 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It feels like you’re living under surveillance. Every post. Every text. Every word. Measured, reviewed, obsessively rechecked. You shrink yourself t...
communication mastery series part 3: stop people pleasing, start owning your space
22 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In today’s episode, we’re peeling back the layers of the boundary-setting conversation, and doing it differently than you’ve heard before. We’...
healing in a world that won't heal
17 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You’ve been carrying someone else’s burden. The weight of their healing, their progress, their transformation. You’ve believed that if you just ...
communication mastery series part 2: the stoic art of emotional control
15 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome to Part 2 of our Communication Mastery Series. In this episode, we’re diving into something powerful and timeless: Stoicism. This philo...
i miss who i was before the internet knew me
10 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The internet never felt exactly safe, but it did used to feel like freedom. A wild, unstructured frontier. A portal you stepped through to escape fami...
communication mastery series part 1: command your voice, command your life
08 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The way you communicate will either open doors or shut them. It’s time you start mastering it. You’ve been talking your whole life, but what if yo...
you're sleepwalking: it's time to wake up to what's ACTUALLY real
03 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You’ve been sleepwalking. Moving through your days as if reality is fixed, inevitable, and happening TO you. You’ve felt hijacked by the comments,...
why you crave chaos in love
01 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Why does love feel most real when it hurts? When the tension, the pull, the rupture are the only things that makes you feel alive? If you’ve ever fo...
the demons you bury are the lessons you need to learn
27 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The same problems keep showing up in your life, don’t they? The same struggles, the same emotional triggers, the same conflicts that feel like they’...
how the energy you carry is secretly controlling your life
25 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You think you’re moving through life as yourself, but something is running beneath the surface. A frequency, a pattern, a program that shapes everyt...
you say you've changed — so why does your life look the same?
20 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You tell yourself you’ve grown. That you’ve done the work. That you’ve broken the cycle. So why does everything still feel the same? Why do...
the truth about healing: you’ll never be who you were
18 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
They taught you to fear your scars. To see them as proof of failure. To believe that if you could just erase the marks, you could go back. Back t...
what you lose when you share too much
15 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
You’ve been taught that vulnerability is the path to intimacy. That the more you reveal, the closer you become. But does sharing everything really b...
why limerence FEELS like love, but isn't
11 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Ever found yourself trapped in a cycle of longing, obsession, and emotional chaos? A constant craving for validation, attention, or affection from som...
will AI set you free or control your mind? (psychiatry, mental health, and the machine age)
04 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
AI isn’t coming for your job. It’s coming for your mind.Psychiatry and artificial intelligence are merging faster than anyone is paying attention ...
what stories are you telling yourself about your suffering?
25 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It’s time to get real about the stories you tell yourself and how they shape your emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being. If you've ever felt t...
dysfunctional family roles – part 5: hidden agendas (the peacemaker/mediator and narcissistic traits) [preview]
20 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back to our deep dive into the heart of dysfunctional family dynamics. This is the final episode of our series where each segment builds upon ...
mind unveiled part 6: the individuation process as spiritual ascent (integrating outer psychology, personality types, and the mystical qabalah)
18 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever wondered what it truly means to become your most authentic self? To integrate all aspects of your being—both conscious and unconscious...
dysfunctional family roles – part 4: avoidance strategies (the mascot/clown and the lost child/rebel) [preview]
13 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back to our deep dive into the complexities of dysfunctional family dynamics. You're tuning into Episode 4 of our series, where each segment b...
mind unveiled part 5: the shadow (working with your dark side)
11 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you ever feel like there's a part of yourself that you can't quite grasp? A hidden side that influences your thoughts and actions in ways you don't...
dysfunctional family roles – part 3: responsibilities and escape (the parentified child and the addict) [preview]
06 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back to our exploration into the heart of dysfunctional family dynamics. This is Episode 3 of our series, where we continue to unravel the com...
mind unveiled part 4: the psyche as a living reality (exploring consciousness and the collective unconscious)
04 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever wondered about the hidden depths of your mind? Curious about what lies beneath your conscious thoughts and how it all shapes your realit...
dysfunctional family roles – part 2: the extremes of family focus (the golden child and the scapegoat) [preview]
30 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back to our deep dive into the heart of dysfunctional family dynamics. This is Episode 2 of our series, where each segment builds upon the las...
mind unveiled part 3: unmasking the soul image (the false self, archetypes, the anima and animus)
28 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Do you feel like you’re playing a role, always adjusting who you are to fit in? What if there’s a deeper, truer version of you just beneath the su...
dysfunctional family roles – part 1: decoding the dynamics of dysfunction [preview]
23 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Every family has its secrets—those untold stories that shape us in ways we don't always see. What hidden roles within your family have shaped you? A...
mind unveiled part 2: carl jung and the advent of spiritual psychology
21 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
How do your dreams, symbols, and personal myths shape the life you’re living? What hidden dimensions of your psyche are waiting to be uncovered? In ...
anatomy of evil: britney spears (from pop princess to public prisoner – a story of exploitation and control) [preview]
16 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Britney Spears has been both a symbol of the dazzling heights of pop stardom and a stark reflection of the exploitation that fame often conceals. Her ...
mind unveiled part 1: the birth of psychotherapy and the theories of sigmund freud
14 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome to part one of Mind Unveiled, a six-part series exploring the origins and evolution of depth psychology. To understand how modern psychology i...
from hashtag to holy: reclaiming the mystical art of manifestation from the clutches of social media [preview]
09 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
What if everything you’ve been told about manifesting your ideal reality isn’t just oversimplified but fundamentally misguided? In a world where t...
what if the chains of your past are looser than you think? (breaking free from trauma bonding and repetition compulsion)
07 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever felt like you're stuck in a cycle, repeating the same mistakes, attracting the same toxic relationships, and feeling trapped in your own...
introducing my new podcast, “back from the borderline baby.”
01 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Motherhood cracked me wide open. It’s not the polished journey you see on Instagram or the step-by-step guides in books—it’s raw, unrelenting, a...
self-mastery part 2: embracing the journey through life and soul cycles
31 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Are you ready to dive deeper into the untapped realms of self-mastery and understand the powerful cycles that govern our lives? In this final part of ...
the systemic grooming of a generation (part 1): the unseen puppeteers of the media and pharmaceutical conspiracy [preview]
26 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever questioned why "chemical imbalance" and "mental illness" are the go-to explanations for our emotional struggles? What if these ideas hav...