Chapter 1: What is the main topic of this episode?
Thank you so much. You guys have really helped change my life. And we'll talk about that a little bit today. But I am just forever grateful. And if I would have put money on my favorite teen mom back in the day, I would be a millionaire today. So I'm just gonna throw that out there. It's always my favorite.
Thank you. I appreciate that. And today we're going to talk about a really, really important topic and, and struggle for so many women and families, which is infant loss and pregnancy loss. I don't know if they're not really considered the same thing, right? Infant loss is very different and that's something that you shared with me. And so, um,
I don't want to be the one to tell your story, so if you don't mind telling your story. Sure.
I would love to obviously put a trigger warning out there for any mamas who are pregnant right now, anyone who's recently gone through a loss, because some of the things we're going to talk about today are a little difficult to hear. And, you know, even saying that, saying I have to put a trigger warning out there before talking about my own child, that is difficult in itself.
But I really feel like this is a very important story and message that you have graciously given me the opportunity to get out there. And so to start just a little bit of background with my story, my husband and I met in 2018. We got married during COVID wedding season in 2020. And so our honeymoon was delayed for a whole year. So then we took our honeymoon in 2021 to Disney World.
And that is actually where our first child, McKinsley, was conceived at. And so I went the whole pregnancy. It was my very first pregnancy at the age of 32. So we felt like we were extremely behind everybody in real time. We felt like we were going to be very old parents. So zero complications through the entire pregnancy, really just the normal morning sickness, but nothing serious. bad at all.
And I live in Kansas. And I was 30. I was turning 38 weeks pregnant. And there was actually a really bad snowstorm. And so they canceled my weekly sonogram for that week. which wasn't a big deal. But unfortunately, over that weekend, my husband Ben made me breakfast. And after he made me breakfast, I didn't feel McKinsley kicking. And so I thought that that was a little odd. And it was a Sunday.
So I contacted my doctor's office and they told me I should just go in. We had had our hospital bags packed for a very long time. And
um I'm a big planner so we just grabbed our bags and went on the way there I was extremely nervous I remember praying the whole way there and when we got there they brought in the first doctor and then they brought in a second doctor and a third doctor and by the fourth doctor the fourth doctor told us that there was no heartbeat anymore so while you are
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Chapter 2: How did Heather cope with the loss of her daughter?
To answer the second part of your question, I know I went a little long on that.
No, me too. Sorry about that.
No, that's what's fun about podcasts. You don't know where they're going to go. Yeah, this is true. With getting pregnant for the second time, have you ever... had sex and you just know you made a baby. Like you just, you finish and you just know it happened.
You just know it. Yeah. You know what? That happened a lot more often than I'd be willing to admit, truly.
So it was one of those where when we did our business and then, you know, we said, we just totally made a baby. You know, you just know. And 100%, that's what happened. I'm cracking up. So we weren't preventing, we weren't necessarily like, trying really hard, but it was difficult. All the what-ifs came in.
I'm very fortunate that we have our rainbow baby, but going those nine months was very difficult. But I had extensive checkups because of my history. They did checkups every week with me.
I was going to ask you about that. So knowing, well, because them not really having answers for McKensley and the kink in the cord, I don't...
i don't want to be insensitive so i i hope that you understand that i'm not trying to be offensive when i say this like a like an act like a freak accident like couldn't have been prevented there wasn't an illness there wasn't a genetic disorder there wasn't anything like truly i hope that's not offensive when i say no not at all not at all okay um you know i guess regardless of it being that way
They still do the extra testing, the extra everything. Did they have plans to induce you early? Like how was the pregnancy different this time around with Brody compared with McKensley?
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