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Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeart Radio. Good morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's tip is that similarities lead to liking. So when you encounter someone new, by highlighting things you share, you may be able to connect more quickly.
Today's tip, like some other ones we'll be doing soon, comes from Robert Cialdini's book, Persuasion, a revolutionary way to influence and persuade. In Persuasion, Cialdini asserts that similarities lead to liking, which makes sense. If you share common interests or a common background with somebody, it can be easier to connect and get to know each other.
But similarity can lead to liking in more unexpected ways, too. For instance, Cialdini notes that servers who are coached on echoing their customers' manner of speaking were able to increase their tips. Random similarities apparently pave the way for liking, too. This insight will pop up all over the place once you recognize it. If you rent cars frequently when you travel,
My hunch is that you have had a lot of conversations with rental car agents about your home state. You hand over your driver's license and the agent says something like, Tennessee, Peyton Manning was the best quarterback of all time. Then you connect over your shared love of Tennessee football.
Maybe the next time you rent a car, you find out that, what a coincidence, the rental car agent's aunt lives in Nashville. Maybe another time the agent wants to go to Dollywood next summer. Suddenly, you are starting to wonder whether people from Tennessee or whatever your home state is make up a disproportionate number of rental car agents. Now, that could be the case.
But my guess is that the managers who train agents know what Cialdini pointed out. we like people that we perceive as similar. So if you want a customer to like you, you point out a similarity. Since rental car agents have to look at people's driver's licenses, this is a quick way to find something to talk about.
Probably every rental car agent can make some sort of connection to a state where many of their renters come from. When they start a conversation about your home state, you feel connected. This similarity fosters liking, so you can cheerfully pass the time while the agent completes your paperwork.
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Chapter 2: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
If an issue comes up, like them not having the size car that you reserved, you are predisposed to liking the agent at this point. So everybody stays more calm. If rental car agents can do this easily, so can you. While you don't want to be manipulative, spotting similarities can be helpful in many contexts.
At the farmer's market, you might notice that one of the vendors is wearing a Chicago Cubs baseball hat. You let them know that you are a fan, too.
Chapter 3: How can highlighting shared similarities improve connections?
Next thing you know, you are getting to sample the peach crisp that is that vendor's specialty. When you're sitting on the patio of a brewery and a golden doodle wanders over, you could pet the dog and let the owner know you have a golden doodle at home as well.
Next thing you know, you are talking about a great dog groomer she just found who has much more convenient appointment times than the place you have been going. These similarities make for easy conversations, which makes life feel a little more cheerful. We are positively disposed to people. And suddenly, we are no longer strangers. In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks for listening.
And here's to making the most of our time. Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast.
Chapter 4: What insights does Robert Cialdini provide about persuasion?
If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach me at Laura at LauraVanderkam.com. Before Breakfast is a production of iHeart Media. For more podcasts from iHeart Media, please visit the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
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