Something’s Burning: A Lot of Clickbait-y Topics with Jim + Nikki Norton | S4 E22

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What can we expect from the 2 Bears 5K?

Bert Kreischer 0:00

Last year, so many of you joined us for the 5K, and it was the most amazing experience in person and virtually. It was so much fun that we are bringing it back. This time, it's in Tampa.

Host 0:10

May 4th, we are bringing the whole crew back, including Jelly Roll. Me, Tom, Jelly Roll, listen. If you don't think you can do it, Tommy, tell them they can do it. You can do it. We can do it. We did it.

Bert Kreischer 0:21

Look at us. It's not that crazy. You can do it. You just have to try a little bit. Go to 2bears5k.com to register. And thank you to Spartan for helping us produce and put this on. And everybody at YMH and Birdie Boy. We are so excited. We will see you May 4th in Tampa for the next 2 Bears 5K.

Host 0:40

And I can't wait for Baker Mayfield to verbally commit. He's coming? He's definitely coming. Great ass on that guy. So far, only two Chatterbait ones. Yep, just two. Chatterbait's clickbait, baby. I'm telling you. I know. You believe me? I accidentally clicked on it and stayed for five years. Here we go.

Host 1:05

Dude, have you been to those states where they go, you have to show your ID to get onto Pornhub? Yes, Texas. Texas, right? Yeah. Who? What animal puts in their driver's license and sets up an account? Do you know what just showed up in my thread the other day? I don't know how it got there. I don't know how it got in my algorithm. Sounding. Do you know what sounding is? Of course I know what sounding is. It's when you open the penis hole and you put in, and they get incrementally larger. They're like little metal tubes and it expands the penis hole. I watched a guy smoke a cigarette like that out of his cock. Weird. But the cock hole is a very sensitive area. Dominatrix do that. They'll put the... But have you ever... Like, in college, I had to get tested for whatever. And I remember the guy told me, he goes, hold on to the bench. This is going to hurt. And I was like, I'm good. And he was like, mm-mm. And when he put it in, I was like, I don't think I've ever felt a fucking pain like that in my life.

Host 2:04

Was it a, because I've had that too, either for syphilis or gonorrhea, it's like a Q-tip, and they put it in the hole and they go, and they spin it a little bit. So yeah, it's very, very uncomfortable. Yeah. You quit drinking, right? No. You want a glass of wine? I would love to. Hey, we're two. Fuck yeah. I'm so glad you're back on my team. Thank you, Bert. I heard you took a break and I was like. I took a break for a month. But then I was like, I'm not going to continue to be sober. For what? I think drinking is part of life. But where did you grow up again? Norway? Mm-hmm. Okay. In the woods. In the woods? Kind of. That's okay. Can I tell you, I made this meal today because of where you grew up. We overcook in America. We make huge meals. The other day I went to... Katanya? Katana? Katana? Katana. Over by the comedy store, the sushi restaurant. And it's kind of like tapas, but meat tapas. And I found that a skewer of steak was more than enough steak that I needed. That a skewer of miso cod was more than I needed.

Host 3:04

That a one lamb lollipop was more than I needed. What is a skewer? I don't even know what that is. It's like a sounding thing with meat on it, basically. Oh. Sounding rod. Oh. The cock. Yeah. That was a perfect fucking segue. Speaking of delicious treats. I'm going to sound these steaks, and then I'm going to sear them. I'm going to cook bacon first. We tried to do, so I've got a bunch of things. I've got shrimp, I've got cod, I've got lamb lollipops, I've got ribeye, I've got miso cod, I've got, also I'm going to make a kimchi fried rice. for them to sit on top of. Nice. And so we'll each get a little smattering of the food, and then there's more if we want it, and then have a glass of wine, and have a great time. Cheers, Burrs.

Host 3:50

So happy to be here. Thank you. I'm so happy to be here. Will we ever get a version of Jim where he drinks? I hope not. It would be melodramatic and annoying. You know what I've been saying to Jim is that he should try ayahuasca. I really think because he's very intense and very like all erratic. So I think that if he tried something like that, like maybe shrooms.

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Chapters

7 chapters

1 What can we expect from the 2 Bears 5K? 0:00–6:47 2 What is sounding and why is it discussed? 6:47–18:33 3 How do you cook a perfect steak? 18:33 4 What are the health benefits of kimchi? 17:39–25:25 5 How does alcohol influence relationships? 25:25–35:57 6 What are the different views on sobriety? 35:57–47:01 7 How do you embrace your personal quirks? 47:01–1:01:06

Speakers

2 identified

Host 56 min Bert Kreischer 1 min

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Topics in this episode

Aaron Rodgers 1 George W. Bush 1 Jim 1 Jimmy Carter 1 Leanne 1 Bobby 1 Colin 1 BERT 1 Shinedown 1 Cigars International 1 Cornbread Hemp 1 Morgan Wade 1

Source

Recorded28 Jan 2025

Publisherbertcast.libsyn.com

CollectionAudioscrape Public Library

Transcriptspeaker-named · 100+ languages

Handlerec:250678

Show notes

Comedian Jim Norton and his wife stop by my kitchen for a sampling of skewers, some kimchi fried rice, and more s*x talk than I usually chat about. Sounding and latex are top of the list. 2Bears5K is BACK and we’re bringing a GUEST BEAR! Join Bert, Tom, and Jelly Roll for the 2nd annual 2bears5k. Get off the couch, grab your running shoes, and meet the Bears on May 4th in Tampa, FL. Register NOW at https://2bears5k.com Follow Jim Norton: https://www.instagram.com/jimnorton Follow Nikki Norton: https://www.instagram.com/msnikkinorton This episode is brought to you by Cornbread Hemp. Head to https://cornbreadhemp.com/BURNING and use code BURNING at checkout. SUBSCRIBE so you never miss a video https://bit.ly/3DC1ICg Shirts vs. Skins with Nikki Glaser, Tony Hinchcliffe and Adam Ray as Dr. Phil during THE BIG GAME WEEKEND in New Orleans February 8 https://www.ticketmaster.com/bert-kreischer-shirts-vs-skins-with-new-orleans-louisiana-02-08-2025/event/1B00615EF5BB59D3 Double Down Las Vegas March 21 and 22 https://www.axs.com/series/25430/bert-kreischer-artist For upcoming TOUR DATES: http://www.bertbertbert.com/tour Catch me on NETFLIX For all things BERTY BOY PRODUCTIONS: https://bertyboyproductions.com For MERCH: https://store.bertbertbert.com/ Skewers with Kimchi Fried Rice Shrimp Teriyaki Kabobs * 6 bacon slices cut into thirds * 1 LBS raw shrimp * 8 oz package baby bella mushrooms * 16 cubed fresh pineapple * 1 tsp garlic pepper seasoning * ½ honey teriyaki sauce * 12 slices of bacon 1. Let shrimp marinade in teriyaki sauce for 12 hours 2. Thread bacon wrapped shrimp with peppers, mushrooms, and pineapple then sprinkle with garlic seasoning 3. Grill about 8—10 minutes, flipping occasionally. Brush honey teriyaki sauce halfway through cooking. 4. Cook bacon, crumble, and sprinkle on top of shrimp Lamb Lollipops: * 1 LBS lamb chops * 1 cup brown sugar * ½ TBS ground ginger * 3 cloves garlic * ½ cup soy sauce * 1 TBS sambal chili garlic paste * 2 TBS EVOO 1. Whisk brown sugar, ginger, garlic, soy sauce, and sambal. Marinade pork chops in this for 4-6 hours. 2. Cook pork chops in oil over medium-heat. Bring extra marinade to rolling boil in sauce pan, should become thick and syrup-like. Brush this over chops after they have cooked. Miso Black Cod Skewers: * ½ cup mirin * ½ cup sake * 2/3 cup miso paste * 2/3 cup cane sugar * 2 Cod filets 1. Boil the mirin and sake for 3 minutes 2. Add in sugar, miso then cook for a few minutes making sure it does not boil. Then let cool. 3. Cube fish into small bite sized pieces then pour cooled mixture over fish. Let marinate for 6 hours. 4. Broil the fish for around 7 minutes. Suya Beef Stickers: * 2 rib eye steaks * ¼ cup roasted peanuts * 1 TBS garlic powder * 1 TBS onion powder * 1 ½ tsp smoked paprika * 1 TBS white pepper * 1 TBS cayenne pepper * 1 TBS hot ground pepper * 1 TBS chicken bouillon * 2 TBS vegetable oil * Salt to taste 1. Preheat oven to 450 and lightly spray cooking sheet with oil. 2. Peel roasted peanut and grind them, careful not to turn them into a paste. 3. Mix garlic powder, onion powder, paprika, white pepper, cayenne, hot ground pepper, bullion, and ground peanuts. 4. Add 2 TBS oil onto sliced beef and half of the spice mixture. Let sit for an hour. 5. Rub the steak into the remaining spice mixture, add to skewers, drizzle with oil, then grill for about 3-5 minutes each side until cooked. Kimchi-Fried Rice * 2 cups cooked rice * ¼ cup water * 1 cup chopped kimchi * ¼ cup kimchi juice * 2-3 TBS gochujang * 3 tsp toasted sesame oil * 1 tsp vegetable oil * 1 TBS roasted sesame seeds * Furikake 1. Heat oil in pan and stir fry kimchi 2. Add pre-cooked rice, kimchi juice, water, and gochujang to pan and stir well. 3. Remove from heat and add sesame oil, sprinkle with sesame seeds and furikake Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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