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Brooke and Jeffrey

Masked Speaker: When Mom and Dad's Away

07 May 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What happens when parents leave their teenager home alone?

0.031 - 23.222 Unknown

Imagine an Olympics where doping is not only legal, but encouraged. It's the Enhanced Games. Some call it grotesque, others say it's unleashing human potential. Either way, the podcast Superhuman documented it all, embedded in the games and with the athletes for a full year. Within probably 10 days, I put on 10 pounds. I was having trouble stopping the muscle growth.

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24.043 - 44.95 Unknown

Listen to Superhuman on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. My mother-in-law spent years sabotaging our relationship until karma made her pay for it. She moved in for two weeks, lasted five days, left a mess, and then pressed her ear against their bedroom door and burst in screaming.

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45.071 - 62.233 Unknown

When kicked out to a hotel, she called her son-in-law's workplace, pretending his partner had been rushed to the hospital by ambulance. faked a medical emergency? And spoiler, that was just the beginning. To find out how it ends, listen to the OK Storytime podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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62.253 - 72.926 Robert

Hey, this is Robert from the Stuff to Blow Your Mind podcast. Joe and I are both lifelong Star Wars fans, so we're celebrating May the 4th with a brand new week of fun, thought-provoking Star Wars-related episodes.

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Chapter 2: What impulsive decision did the teenager make with their mom's car?

73.347 - 92.121 Robert

Join us as we tackle science and culture topics from a galaxy far, far away, such as the biology of Tauntauns and Wampas on the ice planet Hoth. or the practicality and corporate business sense of the Sith Rule of Two. Listen to Stuff to Blow Your Mind on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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92.742 - 94.144 Sam Jay

On the Look Back At It podcast.

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94.384 - 97.147 Clifford Taylor IV

1979, that was a big moment for me. 84 was big to me.

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97.767 - 113.044 Sam Jay

I'm Sam Jay. And I'm Alex English. Each episode, we pick a year, unpack what went down, and try to make sense of how we survived it. With our friends, fellow comedians, and favorite authors. Like Mark Lamont Hill on the 80s. 84 was a wild year. It was a wild year.

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113.084 - 122.344 Clifford Taylor IV

I don't think there's a more important year for black people. Listen to Look Back at It on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Chapter 3: What unexpected situation did the teenager encounter while driving?

122.826 - 138.726 Clifford Taylor IV

A win is a win. A win is a win. I don't care what y'all say. Yep, that's me, Clifford Taylor IV. You might have seen the skits, my basketball and college football journey, or my career in sports media. Well, now I'm bringing all of that excitement to my brand new podcast, The Clifford Show.

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139.166 - 157.574 Clifford Taylor IV

This is a place for raw, unfiltered conversations with athletes, creators, and voices that not only deserve to be heard, but celebrated. So let's get to it. Listen to The Clifford Show on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And for more behind the scenes, follow at Clifford and at TikTok Podcast Network on TikTok.

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159.577 - 161.7 Unknown

You don't know me.

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161.72 - 178.455 Masked Speaker

A confession I can't take back. I am... The Masked Speaker. Text to 78592 says, I mistook a tube of garlic paste for some toothpaste. Didn't realize it until I started brushing.

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Chapter 4: How did the teenager react to witnessing a possible crime?

178.936 - 197.247 Masked Speaker

It actually seemed to work, but my wife refused to kiss me that night. Why'd you leave that by the kitchen sink? I was camping once, and I didn't have my glasses on, and I pulled out a tube that I thought was toothpaste, and it was antifungal cream of my husband's. Did your husband still kiss you afterwards? Yeah.

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197.267 - 208.461 Masked Speaker

No, he actually worried that I needed to go to the hospital, but I think it was fine. Oh. I thought they would kiss because the fungus is finally gone. Exactly. Because on this segment, we require kissing during the mass speaker.

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208.481 - 208.701 Clifford Taylor IV

Oh, really?

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208.721 - 222.919 Masked Speaker

Where listeners can come on the show, confess their secrets, and slip us the tongue completely anonymously while we change your voice. We've got a guy on the phone who's picked Alex as his fake name. Alex, do you want to kiss now or after you're done telling your secret?

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222.899 - 224.021 Unknown

All kids know.

Chapter 5: What drastic action did the teenager take to hide their mistake?

224.482 - 225.343 Masked Speaker

Okay. Wow.

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225.363 - 226.064 Unknown

Here we go.

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226.144 - 239.826 Masked Speaker

One, two, three. I felt like I shouldn't have been in the room for that, Alex. I'm really sorry. But the voice changer is on. You are the mass speaker. Whenever you're ready, let's hear your confession.

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239.846 - 254.427 Unknown

Okay. So when I was 15 years old... My parents were going away for the night on their anniversary. Sweet. They had a reservation for a fancy restaurant. They had a reserved hotel room downtown.

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Chapter 6: What was the reaction of the parents when they returned home?

254.968 - 271.333 Masked Speaker

I don't really care about your parents' plans. I'm wondering what your plans were. Parents are out of town. Let's party. I disagree. I want to know what were they doing in the hotel room. What do you think? Never mind. Probably Twister or something. Okay, so your parents are out for the night.

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271.904 - 278.433 Unknown

Yeah, and they said that I was old enough and they trust me and they obviously shouldn't have.

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278.453 - 284.021 Masked Speaker

Yeah, of course. To stay at home by yourself? Yeah. Okay, why shouldn't have they trusted you?

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Chapter 7: How did the teenager manage to cover up the incident?

284.682 - 288.868 Masked Speaker

Same reason my parents shouldn't have trusted me. Same here, Brooke. What happened?

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289.349 - 306.574 Unknown

Well, so they took my dad's car to the restaurant in the hotel and I had just gotten my driver's permit and I thought I'm going to take my mom's car out for a cruise in just to show off to my friends. I mean, I wasn't supposed to be driving because I had a blurs permit. That's right.

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306.594 - 309.758 Masked Speaker

You've all been on joy rides. You found the keys and you were like 14 or 15.

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309.979 - 314.225 Robert

I remember I had my permit. We went to Steak and Shake and I thought it was the coolest thing ever.

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314.245 - 322.156 Masked Speaker

We're getting milkshakes. You should have been 25 to get a permit. Okay, you're going on a joy ride without permission. How does it go?

Chapter 8: What lessons were learned from this wild teenage escapade?

322.176 - 343.181 Unknown

Okay, so I'm on the way to my friend's house. I'm driving down the street, minding my own business, having the music just crank. I get to a stop sign and I see a guy climb out of a house out of the window. He climbs out of the window of the house. And he starts, like, walking fast down the road.

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343.401 - 351.712 Masked Speaker

You're like, ah, this guy's sneaking out, too. Hey, I'm with you, brother. Sounds like a theft or a burglary or something.

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351.732 - 358.842 Unknown

Well, that's exactly what I thought. I thought, oh, my God, I just witnessed a crime. I just witnessed a burglary. I'm going to follow this guy. Oh, no.

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359.303 - 359.623

Wait a minute.

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359.603 - 364.354 Masked Speaker

Oh, man, you're going to be the hero. Okay. You start following him?

364.735 - 380.42 Unknown

Exactly. So I'm keeping my distance, you know, and he looks back and he sees me and he starts to walk faster and then he looks back again and he starts to run. So I speed up. Oh my God. I go to cut him off. I scoot in front of him.

380.44 - 381.001 Masked Speaker

Oh my God.

381.282 - 391.61 Unknown

He screams. And that's when I realized he's a full-on jogger. He's got reflective gear on. He's got a backpack of water.

391.65 - 393.154 Masked Speaker

Why was he climbing out of whiskey?

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