Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
Chapter 1: What unusual drink do they discuss at the start?
testing testing testing testing testing testing testing all right yeah you're right what are you laughing nothing laughing at something you're deranged nothing i mean how are you Yeah, what? What are you laughing at? No, I'm laughing at you. I was just beatboxing while you were... Oh, okay, so that's what you were laughing at.
When you were saying, all right, hello, it sort of went in time with my drum beat. Oh, there you go. That's nice to know. What are you having, a dot cotton? What's a dot cotton? Tomato juice. It is a tomato juice, yeah. No, it's not. It is. No, it's not. What is it? Why the fuck would it not be tomato juice? All right, Ron. It's not a mad thing to have in the morning.
Chapter 2: What funny encounter did David have on the train?
What are you having? What is it? Tomato juice. All right, I've never had tomato juice. It's not that mad, if it helps. It's like a lot of other juice. All right, I've never had tomato juice. Oh, you went... Is it tomato juice? Yeah. I thought you had tomato juice like up a pub. Well, that's a Bloody Mary. It's just tomato juice.
Right, I don't want to sound like an idiot, but what does it taste of? There's no way it tastes of tomatoes. You wouldn't be drinking that in the morning. Well, it's like spicy because it's like a special one. But it's like a Virgin Mary, you know, which is like... Are you lying? Yeah, I came in with a plan to convince you. I'm going to do the old tomato juice prank.
Is he drinking tomato juice when it's actually... It's a film set.
Chapter 3: Which comedians intimidated the hosts when they started stand-up?
Fair enough. Fair enough. Just a spicy tomato juice. Tomato juice on its own is a bit rank. Is it? So many people are going, fucking, they've hit on something here. Haven't they just? Well, I have, because it's always been a blind spot in my life. Yeah, well, do something about it, because you're missing out. Fucking hell, anyway. What? No, no, just that. Oh.
It's put me on the back foot a little bit. Has it? Well, no, because I was just having a drink, not thinking anything of that. I've never seen you drink it online. God, if we get an F out of this. That's insanity. There we go.
Chapter 4: What game do they create based on comedians?
Down in the pips. Down in the pips. I just want it over now. So do I. Fucking rank. Okay. What have you got? I had one thing that happened on the way home, which I texted you slightly about last night. Go on. I sat next to this couple on the train over there, and they were talking about podcasts. All right, hang on a minute. What's that mean? Well, I know what that means.
Well, there was a girl, I think it was a daughter, his daughter was telling, she goes... Ages? Dad about 55, daughter 30. Right. And she was saying, she said something like, do you listen to comedians doing podcasts? Oh, fucking hell. Did she know you were there? No, they literally didn't look at me at all.
Chapter 5: How do the hosts react to their own comedy experiences?
They were quite engrossed in their conversation. And I was like, fucking hell, here we go. And then I did get a bit panicky because I thought they were going to slag them off. But she was going on about different podcasts. It was really interesting. Like what? Like who?
Right, well, the point was she was slightly getting things wrong, which was sort of making me laugh, because you sort of realise that no one really gives a toss and doesn't make a... Yeah, gives a shit. He didn't know about them, and she does, and she doesn't know enough. Yeah, exactly. But she went, have you heard the one by the lad who's with the Harry Potter girl?
And I went... What's that one? That's Alfie Brown, isn't it? Alfie Brown? Yeah, you know Alfie Brown. Oh, Alfie Brown. Sorry. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry.
Chapter 6: What insights do they share about early comedy competitions?
Yeah. Two and two. Puzzle. Pod puzzle. So, Jessie Kane was in Harry Potter. Yes. Right. So, there was a little guessing game for me because she was going, the one with the Harry Potter lady and her husband, and she was saying, they do one and now he's a comedian. Yeah. Who's been a comedian? I know, that's what's made me laugh. Jog on, love. But I was sort of going, this is fun.
And then they were trying to remember Sean Walsh's name. Sean Walsh? Well, I knew it. You knew it. But you texted me and said Sam Walsh. Yeah, I know, because Sean's got two N's in his name and it always fucking goes to something else. He does one about dogs.
Chapter 7: What memorable anecdotes do they share about fellow comedians?
Yeah. Well, we could do a quiz now if you wanted. Oh, yeah. Go on, keep talking. I like this conversation. He's young and he does one about dogs. He's young. He's 40. I know. This is why it's making me laugh. He's young and he does one with dogs with someone else. Do you mean Jack D? Who's Jack D to the fucking newbies? And then this was my favourite bit. God, he is faulty, Sean.
I just plucked that out of my arse. This was the conversation they had. The bloke said this. She replied this. Why are you texting this?
Chapter 8: What final thoughts do they express about the comedy scene?
Why can't you say it? No, because you'll see in a minute. Oh. So she said that, and then he said this. Thank fuck for that. Oh, yeah. Why ask, then? I don't know. It feels funny. So this was what he said. This is for people. He said, does so-and-so do one? She said, I don't think so. And he replied, good as shit. Fucking horrible, isn't it? We get that on trains without us knowing.
I've heard a few things. I heard an older couple talking about going to see Rod Gilbert. And they went, we went to see Rod Gilbert. They said to another couple. And he was good, wasn't he? And their wife went, yeah. And we went to see him again two weeks later. Did the whole show again. And they were really fucked up. But I remember that when I first started watching comedy.
I remember going, oh, right. I really thought they made it up on the spot. Yeah, I know. Yeah, people still think that. I had a right hump with him because he didn't have two new hours. for a full night later. Well, I'm with them. Oh, yeah. I just remembered, I dreamt you were starting out on a world tour last night. God, it's funny you should talk about dreams. I've got two dreams to tell you.
You were starting off on a world tour and we were podding. Oh, stand-up? Yeah. And you were talking like you'd been telling me for like nine months it was starting today. And you were going, but you're doing massive venues. Yeah. That's about an hour ago I was dreaming that. I had a big dream that Lily Allen was banging to me. Like, went on for ages.
Because I'm the one who said I liked one of her songs, not you. She was really sort of pestering me. And then I had a dream. Do you know enough about her to dream about her? No. I went on Instagram, I googled her non-stop in the morning. Oh, in the morning. But did she physically look the same in your dreams? So you must know enough to... Well, I know Lily Allen is. She certainly knew who I was.
But I think I know... I'm just trying to imagine how you'd construct her in your head. Can I tell you my other dream? It's very quick. Well, you might like this one. I had a meeting with Ricky in my dream. Yeah. And he had a paper clip under his skin in his forehead. And no one mentioned it. Well, you wouldn't. But it was a big one, like one you might get at a fanfare. Like a toy one.
I don't want to mention it. Well, you wouldn't. It's a dream, but it's Ricky. It would. I think it would. I wouldn't be the first. I'd hope someone else would. I think your eyes would be asking the question. It's medical. I'm having it out in a couple of weeks. Yeah. Can you do a quip? Quick quip? I haven't got anything I could hold some paper together with, have you? Yeah, you can. I hate me.
No, you don't. It's a love-hate relationship. It's a hate-love-hate. A little bit of love in there. Yeah. Just about the right amount. Yeah, Lily Allen. Anyway, we're going back. Oh, so they were chatting about pods. Yeah, it was just funny. It was just like they just made me laugh. They go, she was listening to pods and couldn't quite remember any of their names.
And she was like, oh, they're really good. Any others she mentioned? Oh, this is what they kept saying as well. The bloke kept going, so whoever she said, he'd just say back, so what, do they just talk shit? God, is that how her father was talking? Well, yeah. Not that terrible. No. So she'd go, so he's married to the Harry Potter lady. And what, do they just talk shit?
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