Connection Codes
Episodes
Slicing it thinner-- going deeper to get to the root (097)
23 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, we discuss the concept of "slicing it thinner" in relationships. We explore the idea of getting to the core of issues and e...
Pushing Through the Pain: Tools for Perseverance and Growth (096)
16 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
We often put an expiration date on how long we are willing to try something new and when the results don't come when we expect, we often give up. ...
How to actually achieve the goals you set (095)
09 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, we dive into the power of the weekly business meeting and how it can transform your life. Whether it's for personal development, ...
How to increase longevity in your life (094)
02 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
The majority of growth is about your mindset. In today's episode, we discuss the emotions that can arise when we think about setting goals or lear...
How to stop creating massive blow ups in your relationship (093)
26 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We dissect the all-too-familiar concept of 'The Dam' in relationships and how often ignored 'debris' can lead to major roadblocks. Jo...
How to connect when you don't feel like you "fit" (Episode 092)
19 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, we discuss the challenge of feeling like the "black sheep" during family gatherings and offer tools to navigate such situat...
Processing holiday loneliness (Episode 91)
12 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, we delve into the topic of loneliness and its impact on our lives. We discuss the different dimensions of loneliness, from feeling al...
090: Managing the Mental Load: Tools for a Successful Partnership with Zach Watson
05 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, Zach Watson joins the podcast to discuss the impact of the mental load and emotional labor in relationships. He shares his own experi...
089: The Art of Listening: Insights from Connection Coders Fab and Claire
28 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, Fab and Claire, leaders of a school for Christian actors and dancers, share their journey with Connection Codes and the transformatio...
088: Can we change our emotions? A Conversation with Josh Haas
21 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, we are joined by Josh Haas to discuss the topic of emotional transformation. We explore the question of whether it is possible to shi...
087: How we got here: Tera's story to the Connection Codes
14 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, we're talking about sharing a little bit more about how our team was created with the Connection Codes. Tera Wages shares her per...
086: Finding Unity amidst Division: The Role of Identity in War
07 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Today's episode is raw and emotional. We are sharing the impact of what the loss of identity can lead to when it is on a massive scale and repeate...
085: How to talk to your kids about sexuality with Clint Davis
31 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Historically parents have often dreaded the lingering need to have "the talk" with their kids. Therapist Clint Davis has spent years researc...
084: Growing Together: A Conversation on Intimacy and Emotion
24 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, Brian and Krista share their journey of using Connection Codes to strengthen their marriage and create authentic connections. They di...
083: Understanding the Purpose of Shame and How It Can Help Us Grow
17 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, Dr. Glenn Hill and Phyllis Hill discuss the purpose of shame and challenge the common narrative that shame is solely negative. They e...
082: Strengthening Family Bonds with Connection Codes
10 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Join us in this episode as we dive deep into the power of Connection Codes and how they can transform your relationships. Our special guests, Rachel a...
081: Below the Surface: The 90% We Hide from the World
02 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, Dr Glenn & Phyllis explore the concept of hiding our true selves beneath the surface. They discuss how societal expectations and ...
080: Finding Freedom: How Uncovering Childhood Pain Transforms Relationships
26 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, guests Elijah and Christina Runyon share their personal journey of using Connection Codes to uncover childhood trauma and find true h...
078: Long term effects of criticisism
19 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In today's episode, we dive deep into the delicate dance of partner criticism. How does criticism impact our relationships, and more importantly, ...
077: Being weighed down by life & how to soften the load
12 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We are talking about how we are often functioning at such a lower capacity because we are carrying around the heaviness of life. We talk about the imp...
076: Flirting & sexual banter setting expectations for sex
05 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Does your partner want you to be more flirtatious throughout the day? Do you feel a block in what even to say? OR are you the partner asking for the o...
075: In-Session: Janet & Rich change the dance after 42 years
29 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Janet & Rich were "good" after being married for 42 years. They had the dance down. They knew the steps. But, they had no idea how much ...
074: Learning to process your emotions is the most important thing you can do this year-- but why?
22 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
All over social media, thought leaders are telling people that processing and regulating their emotions is the most important skill they can have. But...
073: The Human Experience of Concealed Pain and the 'Happy Face' Mask
15 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
It is uncomfortable being human when we are afraid of feeling or talking about hard things. We tend to project positivity or joy instead of being able...
072: How to spark joy when there are so many "negative" emotions
08 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We want more happy things on the Core Emotion Wheel! We get it! 😉 Today, we talk about how you can spark more joy in your life to share with your p...
071: Adding depth to your relationship & working with your partner, not against them...
01 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
If you are in a happy, loving relationship where you feel safe but have moments that suddenly your partner feels like the enemy... Ooooo... you aren&#...
070: Increase learning capacity in kids with Mark & Teresa Lubovich
25 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Mark & Teresa Lubovich know all about helping kids reach their goals academically- and have witnessed over and over that it is often emotions due ...
068: Trauma, Natural Consequences, and Parenting with Echo Vetter
11 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Trauma Informed Coach Echo Vetter comes on the podcast today to discuss how teaching our kids emotional intellegence is in no way a hallpass to let th...
067: Body Image and Intimacy
05 Jul 2023
Contributed by Lukas
How much does body image affect our sex life? When do body image issues begin? And how do American experiences vary from other cultures? We are diving...
066: In-Session: Emotional eating and processing joy
27 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Petra and Jeff began their journey of the Connection Codes for their marriage, then discovered that it applies to many areas of their life. Their most...
065: In Session: Night Terrors, Separation, and Creating Safety
20 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
After years of sleeping in separate beds due to night terrors, then eventually separating as a couple, Dave and Jess found the Connection Codes. Now, ...
064: How to transition from tension to fun in your relationship
13 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
If you have found yourself in a cycle of defensiveness, pointing the finger, or shutting down it can feel hard to break that pattern. It feels like yo...
063: In session- Small Moments, Big Conflicts
06 Jun 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Shawn & Michelle Gabie are sharing a conflict that appears seemingly small to anyone looking in, but when it becomes a daily repeat, it quickly be...
062: Q&A- Pressure in Sex, expectations in chores, and sharing the CC with friends
30 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
There have been several great questions come in recently, we decided to do a rapid fire response. We are going to be talking about how doing the Conne...
061: In Session- How to connect when an emotion feels imbalanced
23 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Connection Coders Roy & Julie are In Session today to talk about the "multiplier." This is when a reaction feels like it should be small...
060: Finding the right time to connect when you are balancing a lot
16 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Jordan & Erika Koop come on the podcast today to talk through finding the right time to do the Core Emotion Wheel. They parents to young kids &...
059: Big ball of yukiness- the difference between guilt & shame
09 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
A listener described her emotions as feeling like one big ball of yukiness-- and we can see how it would feel that way. How can you tell the differenc...
058: Friendship and Feelings: Navigating Emotional Safety and Regulation Without a Co-Regulator
02 May 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode of "Friendship and Feelings," we explore the challenges of processing emotions in friendships and how to create safety in th...
057: He Said, She Said: Navigating Relationship Conflicts and Resolving Disagreements
25 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We dive into the challenges of navigating relationship conflicts and resolving disagreements with your partner. Using a courtroom analogy, we discuss ...
056: Emotional Intensity: Why Some Feelings Hit Harder Than Others
17 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Do you ever feel like you have been hit by sadness so hard that it is hard to move? But another time sadness could come and go quickly? There are diff...
055: Unpacking Anger: Navigating the Emotion and Finding Peace
11 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Today, we will be discussing secondary anger and how to get to the core emotion. Secondary anger is a response to another emotion, such as fear, hurt,...
054: How to overcome decision fatigue
04 Apr 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Do you stand in the aisle of Target debating what shampoo to buy? Or do you have to keep telling your waitress for one more minute while you decide di...
053: Am I enough? And other question you ask after a big life change.
28 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Babies, marriage, retirement, moving, loss… there are so many moments in life our identity shifts. Those moments leave us feeling lost, unsure of wh...
052: How to move forward when your partner is shut down
20 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Ever sense that your spouse is still upset the day after a conflict & you don't know what to do to move forward? Today, we dive into how to break ...
051: Defensiveness, Parenthood, and life after the Connection Codes with Chris Cruz
14 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Chris Cruz joins us today to talk about life before and after the Connection Codes. He dives into the moment he shifted from kind of using the tools t...
050: (Part 2) Living with Narcissism & Psychological Disorders
07 Mar 2023
Contributed by Lukas
What do people experiencing narcissism need? Can you heal narcissism? If you are living with or in relationship with someone experiencing a psychologi...
049: (Part 1) Living with Narcissism & Psychological Disorders
28 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Are you in relationship with someone who experiences narcissism? Have you been accused yourself of being narcissist? This two part series is for you. ...
048: Childhood trauma affecting who we are in relationships
21 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Everyone has a childhood, a past before we met our partner. Those formative years shape how we are showing up in our relationships today- whether we r...
047: Physical touch-- What is happening under the skin?
14 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
One person is craving, actually desperate for physical touch. While the other is touched out or unaware of it's power. Today, we are diving into the s...
046: Obligation sex during a holiday
07 Feb 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Are you already feeling a sense of dread that Valentine's is around the corner so it is a guaranteed night you will need to show up sexually? Or are y...
045: Is experiencing fear & shame unbiblical?
31 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
The Bible says, "Do not fear." "Do not worry about tomorrow." So, what does that actually mean? Is it wrong to process and feel these emotions? What a...
044: In Session: Elijah's Journey to Rediscovering Himself and His Family
24 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
It was late at night while laying in bed, Elijah had an epiphany- he was experiencing a disorder of the psyche. This pattern was affecting his wife, h...
043: How to Human with Carlos Whittaker
17 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
When is the last time you changed your mind? How often do you say the name of the grocery clerk bagging your groceries? When did you last pause and co...
042: Am I proud of myself?
10 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Do you want more out of life? Do you wonder what steps to take to get to the next level? To wrap up our beginning of the year series, we brought in Sk...
041: How to create habits that will change your life
03 Jan 2023
Contributed by Lukas
We set our goals- but we fail to reach them because we don’t create the habits it takes to succeed. We break down why habits are important, where pe...
040: Goal setting for 2024
27 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Ever wonder how to set goals? What mindset helps you actually achieve your goals? We are diving into the emotions involved in goal setting and how to ...
039: My partner doesn't want to talk about emotions...
20 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Do you ever find that you are trying to process your emotions but your partner isn't on board to participate? They may say that they don't feel certai...
038: When your marriage hits a wall
13 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Why do people fight after they leave therapy? Why aren't date nights helping your marriage? Do you ever feel like you are trying things but getting no...
037: How to help someone struggling with depression... even if that someone is you.
05 Dec 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Dr Glenn says, we know the exact number of humans who need help in the world. And that number is 100%. All humans need help... because they are human....
036: "I felt like I was too much for people"
29 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
In session with Elijah & Christina as they share the tools that have transformed how the communicate with each other & how it has helped them ...
035: How to make it through the holidays without a fight
22 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Lots of emotions come up around family-- your family, your partner's family, the absence of family, the stress of all the tasks to be done. It can be ...
034: This action is damaging your relationship-- and you don't even know it
15 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Feel alone at times in your relationship? Have you ever thought it felt like you were talking to a wall? Do you ever freeze up and feel unable to resp...
033: How to help someone grieving
08 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
What is the right thing to do for grief? What do we say? How do we support someone the best way? Phyllis shared on an episode a few weeks ago ab...
032: Sex questions answered
01 Nov 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Emotional connection? Sex Toys? Masturbation? Setting boundaries? Today, we cover some of the top questions we have been asked. Late Night: http...
031: Kleptomania, building community, and processing loss
25 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Many of us have something that we experience that isn't deemed acceptable-- it is sinful or unlawful. But, we still experience it. The problem comes w...
030: Should I do individual therapy or couples therapy?
18 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
"Relational issues are dealt with in relationship." Today Dr Glenn & Phyllis share their views on when it is right for individual help or he...
029: Being defensive, pointing the finger, and growing pains
11 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
There are growing pains in your relationship journey. From the moment you learn new tools until the moment your relationship becomes safe and secure. ...
028: What is a low libido?
04 Oct 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Do you or your partner finding yourself not desiring sex very often... or not at all? Well, you aren't alone. We have been hearing about the low libid...
027: When you operate at different speeds than your partner
27 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
It is common for one partner to process their feelings much faster than the other. The fast process partner can feel unloved because they aren't getti...
026: Wanting to change your partner
20 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
There are moments in marriage we that we wish our partner would change. We even subconsciously (and sometimes consciously) try to change them. Today's...
025: Sex for connection... not just for pleasure
13 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
It is a myth that men only want sex for a few seconds of pleasure. There is actually something much deeper they are craving. We answer a question from...
024: How to gain more energy in your day
07 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
There are obvious things depleting us from energy: stressful job, parenthood, bills... but there are also the less than obvious moments that chip away...
Mini 002: How to rebuild a relationship with your child
02 Sep 2022
Contributed by Lukas
From the time our kids are small, we take actions that unintentionally break their trust. This episode answers the question, "How do we rebuild trust ...
023: What safety in a relationship looks like-- and how to get it
30 Aug 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Dr Glenn & Phyllis dive into a moment where they were both filled with emotion. They break down how they kept it from becoming a disconnect & ...
022: {Mini} Managing the before-school breakdowns with your kids
26 Aug 2022
Contributed by Lukas
With kids going back to school, we wanted to address the issue on many parents minds--- getting our kids out the door and to the school while managing...
021: Raising a passionate child, managing logistics, and building connection with your kids
23 Aug 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Hey parents who are raising those strong willed children! This one is for you. We talk all about connecting with our kids, setting goals as parents, a...
020: Anxiety and depression in kids
16 Aug 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Parents often don't know what to look for when their kids are struggling. What could be anxiety or depression can easily look like defiance or a bad a...
019: Pressure from sex (Part 2)
09 Aug 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Part 1 Pressure from sex had such a big reaction that we decided we needed a part 2. In this episode, we talk about where the pressure comes from. We ...
018: In Session- Unspoken emotions causing years of pain
02 Aug 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Sam & Lindsey came into their marriage with years of unprocessed emotion (like most of us) but it created cycles of deep pain that they are now wo...
017: I am tired of pressure from sex
26 Jul 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Are you ever in conversation then next thing you know you are disconnecting over sex? How did we get here? Tera walks through a recent conflict when s...
016: "That happened 20 years ago." Fights from the past causing fights today.
18 Jul 2022
Contributed by Lukas
So often, couples fight today because of conflict that happened in their past. It can be frustrating for one partner because you feel like it happened...
015: "I didn't know he deals with OCD"
11 Jul 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Psychological disorders affect around 1 in 7 people globally & often go undiagnosed. In today's episode, Dr Glenn opens up about his disorders of ...
014: In Session- I thought I was a good husband because I didn't yell at my wife
21 Jun 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Today's episode shows the transformation of how Xiomara & Hubert went from experiencing a lasting silent treatment to being consistently connected...
013: Her husband wants more sex. She wants more connection.
14 Jun 2022
Contributed by Lukas
In response to an email from a listener- we are diving into the standoff many couples find themselves in. One partner wants sex. The other partner wan...
O12: Take your sex life to the next level
31 May 2022
Contributed by Lukas
So many couples have a partner wanting more in sex and another who is battling pain or intense emotion keeping them from opening up. We talk about rel...
011: Avoiding emotions... especially the bad ones
24 May 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Does it feel like you or your partner is "allergic" to emotion? You avoid anything to not feel the bad emotions, so you definitely don't want to sit d...
010: In Session: Postpartum trauma and staying connected during difficulty
17 May 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Postpartum is often a difficult experience on its own, add it to a season of pain and it can take a toll on a person. Katie and Chris opened up about ...
009: I want to punish my partner for hurting me...
10 May 2022
Contributed by Lukas
After we have been hurt our instinct may want to hurt someone back. We have it sit and make the decision of if we are going to quickly forgive and mov...
008: How we navigate trigger Topics- Family, Sex, Finances
03 May 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Many relationships eventually reach a point where there are topics we tend to avoid- we call those Trigger Topics. Today, we dive into our top topics ...
007: In Session: He hung up on me.
26 Apr 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Go in session with Dr Glenn & Phyllis as they work with a couple through a fight that has turned into a cycle. They help Wes & Tera break down...
006: The top reasons people go to therapy--- from a therapist perspective
19 Apr 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Dr. Glenn & Phyllis have sat with hundreds of people dealing with a wide range of issues. In this episode, we talk about the top reasons that brin...
005: Following the energy, moving forward after an argument, and codependency
12 Apr 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Today's podcast comes directly from a question from one of our listeners! We are sharing how to move forward after a disconnect & if the sting is ...
004: How to be a smarter, healthier version of yourself (Part 2)
05 Apr 2022
Contributed by Lukas
We often don't realize how much emotions affect how our bodies and brain function. So many of us are functioning at a fraction of what we could be- al...
003: How to be a healthier, smarter version of yourself (Part 1)
22 Mar 2022
Contributed by Lukas
We aren't going to tell you that you need exercise & broccoli, although we do promote a healthy lifestyle. Because of brain science, understand th...
002: Taking steps towards healing (Part 2)
16 Mar 2022
Contributed by Lukas
This episode begins the transition from a painful marriage to a marriage experiencing healing. It didn't happen overnight, but the result was the crea...
001: Living in a marriage filled with pain (Part 1)
16 Mar 2022
Contributed by Lukas
If you have ever found yourself in a relationship that wasn't what you imagined when you started... this episode is for you. Within 24 hours of their ...
Intro to the Connection Codes Podcast
09 Mar 2022
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome to the first episode where you meet your hosts Dr. Glenn & Phyllis Hill who have created the guide to human connection. Yes, through decad...