Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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Bonnie, who used to be a former sex worker and now hosts the podcast done blonde.
Most little girls grow up wanting to be doctors and lawyers and shit. And I was like, I want to be super hot, make a lot of fucking money and be a rock stars wife. That was my goal as a child. And here we are.
what's up you sexy motherfuckers welcome to another episode of dumb blonde today i have a mother-daughter duo which is a first for me because i normally don't do mother-daughter duos but these two have grown up together in the public eye and i figured what better duo to bring on than sophia and farrah abram yeah I know. What a good duo. That is true.
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Chapter 2: How do Farrah and Sophia navigate fame and family dynamics?
and really are like wow you opened my eyes to parenting in a different way so yeah I was never the girl though I was never the kid growing up to be like could I get a piercing could I get a tattoo could I get this could I get that it was just no one ever had any of those things growing up and so I just never thought about it and when
I'm like famous and people are just like, I'll give you free this, free this, free this, free tattoos. Like I could tattoo up my whole body. I could do all that. I just, myself personally, I'm not prepared for that. But I see like Sophia is prepared. She's at that point in her mental state, in her life. And she...
can do that and i'm not the person to i don't know i've just gone through this whole thing with a lot of legal battles that i am going through and i learned so much about consent culture and leading with that and allowing someone to have their will their rights their freedoms and i think that's just very important on maybe the littlest things like a piercing or tattoos and so i'm just again those three things scenes dave supported that's all i need to be for my child
I never thought that I would agree with you more. I totally feel the same way because I feel like in this generation of parenting and children, because we have a 16 year old, she's about to be 16. There's so much more shit. You got to choose your battles. There is so much more shit, worse shit that these kids could get into. Excuse my language. Yeah. that these kids could be getting into.
And it's like, if they want to get a piercing, they're going to, it's either it's a phase or it's not. I kept mine for 20 years. You know what I'm saying? So it's like, if Bailey wants to come to me and get a piercing, that's going to make me happy. Cause she could be like doing other things that are way worse behind my, our parents, you know, her parents back. And I just totally agree with that.
I think making kids feel seen and heard and letting them be who they want to be and having free will is amazing. an amazing route to go. How do you feel about that? Do you love that your mom lets you get piercings and stuff like that?
Yeah, I'm very grateful that she supports all my decisions and my piercings.
We love your look. We were just talking about it. I was like, if I could look like Sophia, I would, because that's really how I look on the inside. I love Sophia's look, too. And I'm happy with whatever look she decides and what she loves. Yeah, I just feel like I was just raised in a different way. I was called a witch for wanting a rhinoplasty. By your mom? Yeah, by my mom.
So I know that that doesn't give anyone self-worth, like feeling worthy. And that is number one when you're getting, you know, if you have fame or if you have anything, your self-worth needs to be built up so that you are not vulnerable for other things. Like I was very much predatored on and still dealing with some of those problems. So I'm just trying to set up a next generation to have that
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Chapter 3: What challenges have Farrah and Sophia faced with public perception?
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Farrah, do you feel like you are having an opportunity to be the mom that you never had with Sophia? Yeah. I mean, I don't know if it's the opportunity to be the mom that I never have, but I have one opportunity to be the best parent that I can be in my life. I have no competition with my mom, my grandma, my sister. I have no competition with anyone to be the best mom.
I am running my own race and being the best parent that I can be. And I was given eye-opening experiences in my lifetime to say, I'm not repeating that with my child. So public school, it wasn't going to be repeated. I had a superintendent as a neighbor. No matter how much we push and push and push to have a better, safer public school environment, it just never happened for me.
Fights, bad situations, and I guess like when like a public or governmental system fails, I take it upon myself to just lead. So I found like best homeschooling practices and whatever else like for Sophia's career, those type of things. I don't know. No one's laid out the no one's laid out that path.
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Chapter 4: How does Farrah address her experiences with plastic surgery and societal expectations?
So I've definitely I'm just like I'm on this journey and figuring out as fast and as best as I can. I don't think anybody knows how to be a parent. I inherited a child and we're still figuring it out. Yeah. We got full custody of Bailey seven years ago. And nobody gives you a handbook and says, hey, this is how you have to be a parent. And there's also no one size fits all to being a parent.
That's right.
Yeah. Every child is different.
Yes.
Every emotion, every personality. It's just all different. Yeah. And so I think. I think as long as Sophia is happy and healthy and feels like she's safe, you're already winning. Yeah. And do you feel these things, Sophia?
Yes.
She's shaking her head over here.
Yeah.
I mean, everyone is different. I mean, I got Sophia's brain scanned and I got my brain scanned. From Dr. Amen, right? Dr. Amen. How was that? Because I was going to do that with him too, but I chickened out. Yeah. Yeah, it is life-changing. I feel like that is literally what, I mean, to know yourself better than anyone else could tell you who you are.
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Chapter 5: What parenting philosophies does Farrah share regarding Sophia's choices?
So when you went to the, what was this exact program? Was it like to actually treat like childhood trauma or was it like, Oh, so I was sexually assaulted recently. It wasn't like in childhood. And I think a lot of the people who I met, they had significant amount of like sexual assaults, trauma, those type of things. Very deep, like veterans were there.
All sorts of things that they had held on for a very long time. I think with one trauma... like a sexual assault trauma, I don't think I could endure or live if I didn't go get help. So I was like, I need something. Can you talk about the sexual assault? What happened? Is this the situation that happened with the mayor? Yeah. I mean, we're like really dealing with all that stuff like right now.
Yeah. So I don't like me to like hold anything back because I'm sure it would help so many people. But I also know like we are dealing with someone who is systemic, like habitually a rapist. So I probably don't want to give any fuel to that. But if we want to just talk about like
great things for other you know like honestly I said to myself this week because I'm dealing with so many legal issues I said to myself I was like I think I'm gonna have to break down and just go get a support group because I'm like gotta be tough to hold all that in and not talk about it Yeah, because again, like rapey vibes, right?
Rape culture vibes, opposite of consent, consensual vibes is lying, continually like masking. And when you're going through a legal issue and someone's always lying and speaking for you and covering their ass and it's just like, huh, you know, I can journal about it. But I also like, I truly like to watch movies and that dive into like someone making peace, getting past it and like moving on.
So it's like I've made peace with it. I'm trying to move past it. But then you have these legal core problems that just go on for years, like my lawyer said at the beginning. And I just feel, you know, like my heart goes out to so many other rape victims who are like going through this stuff for years. It just is really tedious. Yes. Yeah, it's very hard.
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Chapter 6: How has social media impacted Sophia's friendships and self-image?
I do think talking about it, like you said, is probably the best thing, one, for you, therapy, and two, that's your testimony, something that you've survived and that you've gone through. So maybe people are able to connect with you if they were to know more details of what had happened or what is going on.
Yeah, I mean, I think it's just this is sad, but from reading so many legal documents about assaults, because, again, I didn't understand the situation that I became a part of, which was like a sexual assault like problem and. so my lawyers just kept sending me a lot of like legal documents to read of like Jane does.
So I like would understand what it looks like, why this happens, like all these things. And then I got so interested in it and so passionate that I was like, Oh, I'm going to go get a legal degree. Um, I went down there, I got my paralegal certificate and I'm getting ready to do a JD in law. But I think,
the comment like this is so weird that this happened at this time in my life but I saw like innocent people not being believed and then I saw a lot of people who actually lied this could be men or women or lie about being sexually assaulted. And I think learning from lawyers what we're looking at, how we're seeing that, how this comes up, you really know to fight for your truth, to stand firm.
Because others who lie and kind of like predator
like men or women who they claim that they were assaulted by um that's like a whole other psychological thing so I think there's like a lot of trauma work no matter what even if you're lying about it if you're telling the truth I've been going through all this stuff and breaking that down because I started writing a screenplay about it and I used it in one of my Harvard classes for screenwriting and I got to see it like acted out with actors and read and I think like
Maybe just for me, I would feel safer showing that in like an artistic form, like a series. And I love watching movies and TV series that really help comfort people who are actually really going through a long, long legal battle.
With sexual assault, because I think like Sophia showed me some funny episode on Shameless about one of the guys like pretending that he got sexually assaulted and going in and going through this whole process. And I think sometimes you need. You need someone like my daughter to let you laugh and make light of a really deep, dark situation that I was put on medication for.
The medication wasn't helping. Were you raped? Yeah. OK. Sexually assaulted. OK. Or I don't know what that means to you. So sorry. Yeah, I mean, there's so many. I'm like, I don't know if you know what I'm saying. No, no, you're good. There's so many different. Oh, I was like. Oh, okay. You know, falls under that umbrella.
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Chapter 7: What insights do Farrah and Sophia provide about their personal growth and relationships?
Like I am so flourishing, happy, independent in my life. And it's good that I got to, again, write down inventory and see why and what. So there's these prompts about childhood, what I would like to say. Do I want to write letters to them? And half the letters I wrote when I was there, no one responded or no one wanted to talk about those things when I got out.
So I'm just taught to be like, okay, that's where someone is. They can't meet me and I have to go live my own life. So that's what I've been doing. It's been really relieving, a relief.
does your relationship with your mom affect Sophia's too Sophia do you choose to talk do we call her grandma do you choose to talk to grandma or just be or because mom and her don't have a relationship you choose not to also um honestly I'm really comfortable not talking to her at all and with my grandpa too um it hasn't really bothered me at all not talking to them over the years gotcha
I'd have to say like anything that I do does not need to affect someone else.
Right.
A lot of the grandparents in my family, I've just noticed a habitual thing where they feel like.
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Chapter 8: What future projects and goals do Farrah and Sophia have planned?
fair as, like, me, I'm the horrible person because I'm making someone else not talk to them. To be completely transparent, I saw that my daughter was being affected by their bad behavior every time that they were around. You know, to not feel loved, to not be heard again, like, as a kid, or just be, like, just back and forth, stuck between all these I can't say the word immature.
It's just a lack of education of how to have communication. That's really just...
such a mess that I was raised in that I knew I did not want that for my daughter and I was trying to be like a good daughter and like I flew my daughter out to Arizona to meet her other grandparents I've flown her back and forth for 16 years or whatever to like see her dad's side of the family but when you go to a trauma center and you take time for yourself that is so needed and everything's quiet and you see wow
I am such a damn good parent because I'm the only one who's paying, flying, doing. No one else is. Right. It's been over a decade. Like, let's stop this charade. But more importantly, you're there for your daughter. Like, I don't see you without Sophia. Yeah. Yeah. Like, I am number one, I think. And you're making her feel every way that your parents never did.
And to me, that's a sign of a good parent is breaking generational trauma and generational curses. Yeah. And I think you're doing the best that you can. All the way. And so it can be seen transparently of who, what, everything, genetics, what's going on, why someone might be doing this, why someone might not, and to choose better choices.
So Sophia was kind of the one to say, like, I don't want to hang out or I need a break from. certain grandparents so the charade of the grandparents continually always acting like I hinder anything I've I've seen with clear eyes what it is now so and you just choose to remove yourself from a toxic situation which that's not a bad that doesn't make you a bad person
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