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Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Hello, everyone.
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Thank you.
Hello, everyone. Another week, another audio industry thought seminar led by Ellis and John. We're in high demand for our unique insights gathered from 12 years of digital broadcasting, be it how to come up with new and engaging formats or the CCTV blind spots where you can vape in the BBC or how to advertise Fuse Energy without sounding like you're grieving.
After blowing the minds of industry movers and shakers at South By in Shoreditch, it was up to Britain's content capital, Manchester, for a meet and greet organised by Clotted Panda.
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Chapter 2: How do Ellis and John handle surprises during the podcast?
But there's one thing you can't replicate through vertical integration or dynamic placement. Good old-fashioned face-to-face. Ellis and I boarded the midday train for some rare time alone, and it was clear from the outset that both of us were fizzing with ideas for the future of podcasting.
And a good job too, as spending the journey idly scrolling through our phones would have been impossible due to the 30 seconds of 5G available across the two and a half hour journey. It is insane. As we sat down, Ellis was first to get the creative juices flowing. These tables have wireless chargers. What about wireless podcasts? What do you mean, I said.
Get Dave to look into it, Ellis replied, handing me an iPad and Bluetooth stylus. Our next lightbulb moment came from the limitations of onboard Wi-Fi and the landscape of the West Midlands. I erected my travel whiteboard. Wi-Fi cows. Mini Wi-Fi masts tied to herds of free-range cows. Tagline?
improve your range with range on the range yeah the ball was now well and truly rolling ellis closed his eyes podcasts podcasts podcasts for farmers i'm thinking vernon k i'm thinking desert island crops i'm thinking sponsorship from john deer big pesticide and the egg board i sent a voice note to clear and at jap flack media They'll have a pilot by Wednesday. Luggage racks for headphones.
John, it's perfect. It's done. I love you. Okay. Patreon inspiration alert. We wear GoPros on our heads and visit every Boots in Wolverhampton. Ellis, it's perfect. It's done. And I love you. I've messaged Dave on Slack and he's typing. It's tick, tick, tick. Three ticks from the master blaster. As the attendant placed our complimentary coffee and shortbread on the table, I jumped from my seat.
The rest is politics nude at the O2. John, it's perfect. It's done. I love you. We stared at each other. The electricity crackled and we both said in unison, podcast live aid. Wembley Stadium. Adam Buxton opens and then flies on Concord to LA. 10 hours of podcasting using a revolving stage. As news agents are on and Wolf and Owl are striking their set, my therapist ghosted me at tuning up.
But John, who's our queen? Who's our podcasting super group? Katherine Ryan, Krishnan Guru Murthy, Rob Beckett and Mary Beard. John, it's perfect. It's done. I love you. What about security? We both said in unison, Nord VPN, before laughing and laughing and saying we loved each other again. That's what it was like. So many ideas. We were fizzing.
David was mad. Two hours on the way up with zero 5G. Obviously the onboard Wi-Fi doesn't work. Just idea-ageddon, which is what I kept referring to it.
We should have actually texted you because we have commissioned 200 new podcasts for Significant. It's quite pricey. Sorry, Dave. But we think it's going to work out.
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Chapter 3: What creative ideas emerge during the train journey?
What? How is that possible?
Also, they'll tell you that you've got three bars of Wi-Fi. You haven't got three bars of Wi-Fi. You've got three bars of ****, Dave.
That's what you've got. It is awful. However, I did like the fish and chip pie we had on board more than I expected because it doesn't sound like something you'd like.
It sounds horrendous, but you chuck enough tartar sauce on it and it becomes fantastic.
Yeah. Chuck enough tartar sauce on anything savoury and it's going to be better.
And again, so we arrived at Manchester Piccadilly. I love Manchester. Everyone always knows that. But then we walked to the venue, which was over a mile away. John striding ahead, obviously.
I thought it'd be a lovely 23-minute walk and I got, you know, halfway. We're nearly there yet. I thought it was a 10-minute walk.
Dave and me, you know, sort of picking up the rear. Every time we walk past a nightclub, Dave would say something like, I got pushed down the stairs down there. A bouncer pushed me down the stairs.
Yeah, teasers. Teasers. It's like an 80s nightclub. It wasn't a strip. It was not a strip joint, but it was like scantily clad girls dancing on bars and stuff. And you got pushed down the stairs. Sounds like a strip club, Dave.
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Chapter 4: How does the World Cup influence their made-up game?
No, there you go. Like in a strip club.
I was 18. Long time ago.
I think I got pushed on the stairs, but you were all right.
Yeah, I don't know. It's just a guy took a... Clay didn't like me before I knew I was down the stairs. Actually, as I got kicked out, I cried. But not through how much it hurt, just through anger.
They didn't show that on Boo's Britain Binge Nation 3 or whatever.
The sensitive director's cut where everyone's in tears all the time. One of my mates comes up, bloody hell mate, you alright? And I was like, is she what I got kicked out for? And I started to cry and I went home. Oh, I've cried on a night out for ages. No, not to be fair. I'm not blessed.
Next question. 44. So, yeah, we're pretty big in the conference scene, Dave. We are at the minute. We're headliners at conferences.
Yeah. Isn't that mad?
Well, it's good.
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Chapter 5: What surprising news do they reveal about Ellis's future performance?
No, I'm not going to say that.
I went to a theme park on Tuesday. No, it could be any of them. It could be Chessington World of War.
It could be Chessington World of Wonders. I went to Redacted World of Adventures. Why are you about to strike them off? If it rains heavily, it's not a great day out. But that's not on Chessington, is it?
Well, hold on. Are we naming it or do you not want us to?
We're not going to get sponsored by Chessington World of Adventures, Dave. What's that talk about you getting chucked out of a strip club?
It's not really the vibe. There's very little room to shelter. And if there's a threat of lightning, they close all the rides.
That's every theme park though.
That is every theme park, including Redacted World of Adventures.
Including Redacted World of Adventures, yeah.
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Chapter 6: How do the hosts reflect on their growth over the years?
Yeah.
But still, nice to go up to kids who are left in the city. Fancy going for a pint. That was good fun.
Well, well, well, well, well, well, well. You've stolen my catchphrase. What's happening? Ellis, it's funny that you should speak about attractions. It's funny that you should speak about the best of Britain. Oh, I don't like this. It's funny that you should speak about school trips.
I feel like I'm about to have my pants pulled down in front of hundreds of people.
Remember that we love you. And it's thousands. Just remember how much we love you and how much we're here for you. We love you, Ellis.
We do.
What have I done? No, you've done nothing, but no.
We love you, Ellis.
Oh, I hate this. We do.
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Chapter 7: What are the humorous anecdotes shared about their past experiences?
It's not my wedding anniversary. But it's been a big personal spiritual growth for Alice James. It has. He's come a long way. Oh, absolutely. No, I haven't. That's the point. What a journey. He has finally decided to give the people what they want. Yes. Let's hear a clip of the moment that Ellis felt that spiritual progress in his body.
On Friday's show, Ellis was beaming because he had made his stand-up debut at Always Be Comedy in Kennington.
Well, I'd thus done it in 2015.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's back. But Josh, you were our boots on the ground.
I've seen him perform twice in 24 hours. You... This is shock and awe. You were there. It came off.
You could have said it again.
And it had gone well. But this is a direct quote. We were talking about his tour. He did say, these are the words. It's head in hands. It's head in hands time. I think it's fair for me to say this. I'm tempted to book the Royal Albert Hall, but I'm worried about the split. I did say that. I've gone mad, yeah.
This is after two 15-minute slots. No, this is the first night. After one 15-minute slot, it'll always be comedy.
That's funny if that's a joke. No, it was a great joke.
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Chapter 8: How does the episode conclude with audience engagement?
Yeah, it will be. It's a Wednesday night. What does it say in your calendar? Betty's going to a Wicker Man event.
LAUGHTER
Ellis, Betty isn't going to a Wicker Man event. Could you delete that, please? Okay. And replace it with headline Royal Albert Hall. What are you on about? We booked the Royal Albert Hall. No, you haven't. Yes, and you're performing there. What do you mean? We mean that on the 24th of March, 2027, you will be performing at the Royal Albert Hall. For whom? For yourself. What?
Yeah.
Oh my God.
Yes, this is official news that Pressure is a Privilege will be performing. The show is called Pressure is a Privilege. How long am I doing? March the 24th, 2027 at the Royal Albert Hall. Tickets go on general sale on the 26th of June at 10am. However, Patreon members will have exclusive access to tickets 48 hours before general sale.
They'll be available to our Patreon members on the 24th of June at 10am. Ellis, do you want to see the poster?
What? This can't... Oh, my word. No, that's not... What? That can't be right.
That can't be right. There's the poster. Ellis James, pressure is a privilege. What? For one night only with John Robbins and Dave Masterman live from the Royal Albert Hall. There you go. That can't be... But this... No one's asked me. No, we don't ask you, Ellis. We don't ask you these things. You are supposed to do it, Ellis. What's the gig? It's you at the Royal Albert Hall.
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