Feel Better

How to Share More Deeply With Your Partner: Simple Ways to Build Emotional Intimacy - Ep 110

30 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

So many couples tell me there’s nothing wrong in their relationship… but it feels flat, distant, or like they’re just co-managing life. The love...

Separation Anxiety, Kid's Grief, and Helping Kids Relax - Ep 109: Ask Charlotte

23 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

As parents, we’re only ever as settled as our least settled child – and kids’ mental health can feel like a minefield to navigate. In this Ask C...

How to Decide What to Let Go Of When Your Plate Is Too Full (Ep: 108)

16 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode of the Feel Better Podcast, I’m talking about one of the trickiest parts of modern life: how to decide what to let go of when your p...

How to Protect Your Relationship from Affairs (Ep 107: Ask Charlotte)

09 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Affairs don’t always start with attraction — they often begin with emotional closeness that slowly crosses a boundary. In this Ask Charlotte episo...

Ep 106: How to Rest When You Absolutely Suck at It

02 Nov 2025

Contributed by Lukas

If you struggle to slow down, switch off, or stop feeling guilty when you rest — this episode is for you. So many of us are caught up in productivit...

Ep 105: Ask Charlotte - When Faith Gets Messy

26 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this Ask Charlotte episode, I’m answering three listener questions that so many people wrestle with when it comes to faith, spirituality and chur...

Ep 104: How to Forgive Someone Who Hurt You — Without Losing Yourself

19 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

We’re told to “just forgive” — by our families, by religion, by self-help books — but almost nobody tells us how. In this episode, I share a...

Ep 103: Ask Charlotte - Is a Sexless Relationship Doomed?

12 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

So many couples find themselves in a sexless relationship — often without ever talking about it. It's estimated that this is reality for as many as ...

Ep 102: Comparison - How to do it Differently

05 Oct 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Comparison is something we all do — often without even realising it. Whether it’s about looks, parenting, achievements, or lifestyle, we constantl...

Ep 101: Ask Charlotte - Parenting Neurodivergent Kids

28 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this Ask Charlotte episode of the Feel Better Podcast, we’re diving into some questions I've been asked by listeners about parenting neurodiv...

Ep 100: Navigating Family Estrangement

22 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Family estrangement is far more common than most people realise — and it’s one of the toughest things to navigate. In this episode, I talk about:W...

Ep 99: Ask Charlotte - Your Mental Health Questions

14 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode of Ask Charlotte, I'm diving into your questions about mental health. I answer: 1) What is PMDD? 2) How do I parent while struggli...

Ep 98: What I've Learnt Parenting Neurodiverse Kids

07 Sep 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Parenting neurodivergent kids can be both incredibly challenging and deeply meaningful. In this episode of the Feel Better Podcast, I share openly fro...

Ep 97: How to feel good enough, accept yourself, and put yourself first

31 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode of Ask Charlotte, part of the Feel Better Podcast, I continue the theme of building a healthier relationship with yourself by answerin...

Ep 96: Want more connection in your relationship? Try these things

24 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Want more connection in your relationship? Do these things.Feeling distant from your partner? You’re not alone. Disconnection is one of the most com...

Ep 95: Ask Charlotte - speaking kindly to yourself, recovering from purity culture, and what to do with 'you' time

17 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

🌿 How do I speak to myself in a kinder way?💭 How do I begin to heal from purity culture?⏳ And what do I do with my precious time away from kid...

Ep 94: What to do when relationship change feels exhausting

10 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

💔 Working on your relationship can feel exhausting — like nothing’s working and everything is harder than it should be. But there is a way thro...

Ep 93: Ask Charlotte - Betrayal, How to Decide to Stay or Leave, and Getting Through "THE ICK"

03 Aug 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to Ask Charlotte - the fortnightly series within the Feel Better Podcast, where I answer listener questions. In this episode, I answer three b...

Ep 92: How to Build a Life that Feels as Good as it Looks

27 Jul 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Ep. 92 – How to Build a Life That Feels as Good as It LooksIt’s easy to chase a life that looks successful — the job, the house, the highlight r...

Ep 91: How to support yourself through big change

01 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Well, if you've been following along lately you'll know that my family and I have moved towns. My kids have moved schools. We're starting ...

Ep 90: How to get your child to talk about their feelings

01 May 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Many parents express frustration with getting their child talking about their feelings. You ask how their day went. Their response: "fine". ...

Ep 89: Seven things couples do wrong

14 Apr 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Are you in a relationship? Come and join me for this episode where I share seven key issues I see in couples who come to me for counselling. This epis...

Ep 88: How to hold realistic expectations for yourself

24 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Holding realistic expectations for ourselves is a very real challenge. Day jobs, side hustles, community commitments, social lives, families, and OURS...

Ep 87: Re-balancing the mental load

19 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The mental load refers to the cognitive and emotional load of 'holding everything together' in our day to day lives - constantly thinking ahea...

Ep 86: What's good about feelings?

02 Mar 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Something that often becomes apparent in my work with clients is that their relationship with their feelings is a problem. And behind this problematic...

Ep 85: How to apologise

20 Feb 2025

Contributed by Lukas

In some of my work with clients recently, I've recognise that the art and science of apology has been an area where many people are falling over. You'...

Ep 84: How I'm dealing with a current stressor

16 Feb 2025

Contributed by Lukas

I live in the same real world that you do! Life happens, challenges some along, and stress rises. In this episode, I step you through how I'm dealing ...

Ep 83: Helping your child through bullying

08 Feb 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It's back to school time in New Zealand, and for many kids that means going back to some really tough social challenges in the school environment,...

Ep 82: Dopamine Addiction - what it is and how to re-set

27 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

Dopamine Addiction is a buzz phrase these days, but it is an important concept to understand when we live in a world filled with notifications, addict...

Ep 81: How to help your child transition back to school

19 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

It's that time of year when the back to school nerves hit for our children. They're real. They deserve response. And there are lots of ideas in this e...

Ep 80: An inside look at my Self Care

12 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

I have learnt to take really good care of myself. My lifestyle depends on it. I want to make the most of my life, and all of that relies on my ability...

Ep 79: The Self Care episode

12 Jan 2025

Contributed by Lukas

The chances are you have a goal to take better care of yourself this year. So, how could you do things differently so you succeed with this goal? I r...

Ep 78: The New Year pep talk you need

29 Dec 2024

Contributed by Lukas

New Year, New You... Well, what about New Year, Same Awesome Totally Already Enough You? In this episode I share a pep talk on how to strike the bal...

Ep 77: Planning for your mental health needs these holidays

09 Dec 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Christmas is coming, and likely some change of pace/routine...   You've planned: where you're going, what you're doing, the Christmas menu, the child...

Ep 76: Do you have high functioning anxiety?

04 Dec 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Join me for this episode where we explore high functioning anxiety - what it is, who gets it, how to heal it. Enjoy!

Ep 75: How to know what you're feeling

28 Nov 2024

Contributed by Lukas

If I asked you right now 'How are you feeling?', how do you think I'd rate the depth of your answer?    So many people answer with: "OK", "Alright" ...

Ep 74: Silly Season Mental Health

23 Nov 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Tis the season to be jolly.... And, stressed, overwhelmed, and exhausted! So, how do you get through this time of year without arriving at Christmas c...

Ep 73: Mental health in a crisis

19 Nov 2024

Contributed by Lukas

For most of us, our life time will included moments of crisis - illness, injury, death, sudden loss, a natural disaster... It's a given that our ment...

Ep 72: Dealing with difficult family members

04 Nov 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Having challenging relationships with family members is far more common than we acknowledge within our society, and can be a source of significant pai...

Ep 71: Dealing with parenting guilt (part two)

28 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In the last episode, I shared all about the important skill of navigating having time away from your children without that annoying parenting guilt ov...

Ep 70: Dealing with parenting guilt (part one)

16 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

So, you went to antenatal class and they talked about birth and what to dress your baby in, but did they talk about the incredible guilt that most par...

Ep 69: Your workaholism questions

16 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, I answer some listener questions in follow up to the recent episode on workaholism as a trauma response.  The questions I respond to...

Ep 68: Your workaholism is a trauma response

10 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I explore the links I see as a therapist between workaholism and trauma - whether this is major trauma or ways of being we learn for o...

Ep 67: Building good mental health in our kids

03 Oct 2024

Contributed by Lukas

I'm a big believer in the power parents have to positively shape their child's mental health over the course of their life. But, where do you start? I...

Ep 66: How are you really?

20 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Well, my friends, it's time to get WAYYYYYY beyond the answers we give to the supermarket cashier when it comes to "How are you?". When we are asked h...

Ep 65: Listener Question - Helping your child transition to school

19 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, I share some advice on helping your child transition to school, with a particular focus around reducing anxiety.

Ep 64: Looking after your relationship through the years with young kids

12 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Well, according to you guys, this is going to be a great episode! I know there are people who have been hanging out for this one...  Parenting is ess...

Ep 63: How to get your spouse to go to therapy

04 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

I get asked this question so, so often and I have LOTS of tips to share. It's time to take it away from being a black and white/yes or no question of ...

Ep 62: Spilling the tea, about me!

04 Sep 2024

Contributed by Lukas

This is a bit of a different episode - it's all about me! I share my back story, more about my counselling style, my work as a Private Investigator, m...

Ep 61: Boundaries Q & A

26 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

This is a follow up episode to Episode 60 on boundaries. In this episode, I respond to a range of listener questions on how to apply boundaries in dif...

Ep 60: Boundaries

26 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Join me for this episode, all about the important topic of boundaries. I'm a big believer that if you don't have good boundaries, you don't end up liv...

Ep 59: Finding Yourself

18 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

I hear this all of the time from people writing to me seeking to engage in counselling... "I just feel I have lost myself, and I've lost my way".   ...

Episode 58: How a stylist can help your mental health

13 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Well, this is a bit of a different episode today, as I share a conversation I had with my friend Steph over on her podcast Style for Life.    I met ...

Ep 57: Listener Question - Managing Parenting Anxiety

11 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Have you heard the saying, "Parenting is a walk in the park, only it's Jurassic Park"? Anxiety about our children's health, development, and activitie...

Ep 56: Listener Question - Dealing with Negative People

05 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Responding well to people who err towards negativity can be tough - whether these characters in your life are friends, family members or colleagues. ...

Ep 55: Encouraging Change

05 Aug 2024

Contributed by Lukas

For many of us, there are things we would like to change - perhaps around our health, around our style of relating to others, or personal habits.   ...

Ep 54: Saying No

29 Jul 2024

Contributed by Lukas

N.O. Two letters, one tiny word, but sometimes so hard to say! Join me for this episode where I share my advice around learning the art of saying no.

Ep 53: Listener Question - Navigating Parenting Differences

21 Jul 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Woah - this is a big one! In this episode, I respond to a listener question about how to navigate parenting differences. I had a lot to say so it beca...

Ep 52: How to get the most out of therapy

21 Jul 2024

Contributed by Lukas

People invest a lot of precious time and money in engaging with a therapist - whether that is a counsellor, psychologist or some kind of coach.    J...

Ep 51: Listener Question - How to feel better when your kids are struggling

14 Jul 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I respond to a listener question about the challenge our children's behaviour/struggles/journey can be to our mental health. I share s...

Ep 50: My favourite personality indicators

14 Jul 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I share about the three personality indicator tools I find most helpful, and encourage you to consider delving into this learning for ...

Ep 49: Downregulating your nervous system - my 'how to' tips

07 Jul 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Following on from my previous episode which explored the benefits of time spent investing in downregulating your nervous system, this episode provides...

Ep 48: Downregulating your nervous system

07 Jul 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I explore the impact that time spent downregulating our nervous system can have on our brain and body. The benefits are profound, and ...

Ep 47: Mental Health when the world is on fire

30 Jun 2024

Contributed by Lukas

This is the episode nobody asked for, but I think we all need. Times are challenging locally and globally - crime, war, cost of living, politics, inju...

Episode 46: Procrastination

24 Jun 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Join me for this episode where I share advice on managing procrastination - in particular, how to understand the beliefs and feelings behind your proc...

Episode 45: Recovering from a bad day

16 Jun 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Join me for this episode where I share some key tips on recovering from a bad day. Bad days happen for all of us, and within our bad days there are of...

Episode 44: Social Media & Mental Health

09 Jun 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Social media brings us opportunities to connect, to be motivated, to engage with social issues, and to learn. But, it can also be a huge challenge to ...

Episode 43: Overcoming Perfectionism

03 Jun 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Perfectionism plagues many people. We live in a world of high expectations, and can internalise these to the point these can become our own very hard ...

Episode 42: How to look after yourself on a busy day

27 May 2024

Contributed by Lukas

This episode addresses a common challenge to our wellbeing - busyness! We all have times where our days are quite 'full' with multiple demands. When t...

Episode 41: How to help a child with anxiety

27 May 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, I explore some of the things you can do to support a child with anxiety. Anxiety is a common experience for children and can escalate...

Episode 40: Unbearable Feelings and Relationships

20 May 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Join me for this episode where I further explore the concept of Unbearable Feelings, looking at how Unbearable Feelings influence our relationships. ...

Episode 39: Anxiety - three things I wish people knew

13 May 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Join me for this episode where I share three things I wish people knew about anxiety.    This has been a long awaited topic on the podcast!    Als...

Episode 38: Imposter Syndrome

05 May 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Join me for this episode where we explore the topic of Imposter Syndrome.

Episode 37: Unbearable Feelings

29 Apr 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Unbearable Feelings have a huge influence on our lives - causing pain, and preventing us from reaching our goals and potential. Join me for this episo...

Episode 36: How to thrive through a busy time, and the winter months

22 Apr 2024

Contributed by Lukas

I know that over the next few months I have a particularly busy time, and, it's also winter, where we typically struggle to maintain a focus on our he...

Episode 35: The Friendship Episode

15 Apr 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Buckle up, this is a biggie! In this episode I talk you through an exercise to review your friendships, which will get you thinking about gaps, where ...

Episode 34: Listener Question - how to feel better after the kids have left home

08 Apr 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, I respond to a listener question about how to feel better once the kids have left home. This period is a huge adjustment for parents ...

Episode 33: How to not loose your mind over the school holidays

08 Apr 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, I share some tips and tricks for planning and surviving the school holidays with your mental health in tact! School holidays can pres...

Episode 32: Listener Question - Emotion Regulation for Neurodiverse People

02 Apr 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, I share more about why emotion regulation can be additionally challenging for neurodiverse people, some ideas on emotion regulation f...

Episode 31: Fair Fighting

02 Apr 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, I share some tips on how to fight fair. I also outline the 'Four Horsemen' concept from the Gottman Institute - a helpful theory arou...

Episode 30: Listener Question - Ageing Well

26 Mar 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I respond to a listener question about our mindset around ageing and offer some brief thoughts on this topic.

Episode 29: Dealing with Rejection

26 Mar 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I share about how I have coached myself through a couple of recent experiences of rejection, and share some helpful questions to ask w...

Episode 28: Listener Question - Health Anxiety

18 Mar 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Episode 27: How to de-funk yourself

18 Mar 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Episode 26: Listener Question: Talking to Others about your Mental Health

11 Mar 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, I respond to a listener question about how to share with others around your mental health challenges, and particularly how you can sh...

Episode 25: Managing a Panic Attack & Grounding Through Difficult Emotions

11 Mar 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I discuss how to respond to a moment where you need to ground yourself - such as a panic attack.

Episode 24: Listener Question - Ideas for Emotion Regulation

04 Mar 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I respond to a listener question: "Can you give some ideas for how to do emotion regulation when you're busy - eg. with young children...

Episode 23: Dealing with Sickness

04 Mar 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Sickness can be such a challenge to our mental health. In this episode I explore emotion regulation and mindset while you're feeling unwell, and how t...

Episode 22: Listener Question - how to help someone struggling with their mental heal

26 Feb 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I share some quick tips for supporting someone you know, if they are struggling with their mental health.

Episode 21: The Conflict Episode

26 Feb 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Join me for this episode where I share some key tips for navigating conflict well. Imagine being able to face conflict with ease - that's what I hope ...

Episode 20: Bonus Episode, Listener Question - Dealing with Difficult Parents

18 Feb 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this shorter bonus episode I respond to a listener question about dealing with a difficult parent relationship.

Episode 19: The Sleep Episode

18 Feb 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Sleep is an incredibly important part of our lives as human beings. It is very difficult for us to feel good mentally and emotionally if we are not ge...

Episode 18: Beginning of the year Overwhelm

07 Feb 2024

Contributed by Lukas

Woweee - it's all happening... Work expectations are on, social schedules are full again, there's lots of remember, you're back into the fast lane, an...

Episode 17: The Self-Esteem Episode

26 Jan 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode, I explore HOW to build great self-esteem, and share a ridiculous but memorable analogy about cake ;)

Episode 16: What's wrong with your resolutions

17 Jan 2024

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I offer some thoughts about New Year's Resolutions and goals. What are you prepared to give up to bring your focus to that goal? What ...

Episode 15: So, you’re super tired. Now what?

29 Dec 2023

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I share some advice on what to do if you find yourself extremely tired having hit the end of year holidays. I look at what constitutes...

Episode 14: Reflecting on Your Year

17 Dec 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Join me as I pose some questions to help you consider the year that has been :) What are you proud of yourself for? Where have been your moments of gr...

Episode 13: Listener Q&A. Grief, Boundaries, Family Difficulties and Disability at Christmas

10 Dec 2023

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I respond to some recently asked listener questions, and cover the following:  - How to journey well with grief over the festive seas...

Episode 12: Some things you need to hear right now (about tiredness)

03 Dec 2023

Contributed by Lukas

In this episode I share some thoughts on talking yourself through what can happen in our minds and hearts when we are tired.

Episode 11: Silly Season Mental Health

24 Nov 2023

Contributed by Lukas

Join me as I share four helpful questions you can ask to support you to feel better through this festive season.