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Financial Audit

Financial Audit's Most Disgusting Guest

08 May 2026

Transcription

Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?

0.031 - 8.725 Caleb Hammer

To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier, check us out on YouTube. And I'm told you think you can make $10,000 a week selling feet pics. Well, I mean, not just feet pics. Your kind of feet are.

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8.825 - 9.666 Unknown

A lot of other stuff.

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10.147 - 14.994 Caleb Hammer

Okay. Yeah. Like farts in a jar. Especially in that Vegas heat. You're actually probably just like a 4 out of 10.

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15.014 - 18.28 Veronica

Yeah, you're a 4 out of a 10. I'm like a 7. See, what do I do with this?

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18.42 - 25.351 Caleb Hammer

I also have a great f***ing personality. Your inflated self-worth is ridiculous. And you think your work... Hey, you're muted, by the way.

25.631 - 27.574 Veronica

Shut up. I'm f***ing talking.

29.005 - 50.187 Caleb Hammer

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50.568 - 57.595 Caleb Hammer

So don't wait until that first pool party to get financially ripped. Click the link below, save big, claim your bonuses now.

57.575 - 62.767 Veronica

Hi, my name is Veronica. I'm 37. I'm from Las Vegas, Nevada, and this is Financial Audit.

Chapter 2: How does the discussion about income and accountability unfold?

144.014 - 158.409 Caleb Hammer

Okay, good. So why do I have essentially what was said here? Because this doesn't really line up with your job. It was essentially you kind of divorced a guy, right? So that you go pursue being naughty online to make money.

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158.449 - 160.812 Veronica

Well, yeah. I mean, it's a really lucrative business.

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161.012 - 166.298 Caleb Hammer

It is, but clearly that's not what you're doing. Sounds like that game plan didn't work out if you're working in accounting.

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166.678 - 168.56 Veronica

Well, I mean, I started out in accounting.

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168.781 - 183.938 Caleb Hammer

I mean, I've been doing accounting for... Well, I know you started out in accounting, but when I just asked what your job is, you said accounting. So it's not... I didn't ask what job did you start out in. I asked, what do you do for a living? You said accounting. Yeah. But that doesn't line up with the... What I have been told...

184.087 - 204.056 Caleb Hammer

Of you leaving your husband so that you could go be naughty online. Yeah, I want to be a dominatrix professionally. Okay. Where's the income and dominatrixing currently? I mean, I'm told you think you can make 10,000 hours a week selling feet pics. 10,000 a week selling feet pics, maybe. I don't know. That seems pretty intense. I don't know what... Well, I mean, not just feet pics.

204.076 - 206.299 Unknown

Your kind of feet are... A lot of other stuff.

206.339 - 206.7 Caleb Hammer

Okay.

206.9 - 212.148 Unknown

Well, yeah, probably. Like used underwear, socks. Oh, f***. Like farts in a jar.

Chapter 3: What are the implications of financial decisions made?

319.462 - 345.506 Caleb Hammer

No, I didn't require perfect, but just nice. No, it's really big. Whatever. It's really big. Yes, that happens when that happens. I get it. Same thing happened to me. I mean, it doesn't make it nice. Whatever. Oh my gosh, I'm not trying to go down that pipeline. You keep making me go. No, it doesn't. Yes, it does. How? Do you not like big ass? Okay. Yeah, sure. Let's define what I like. Sure.

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345.526 - 361.853 Caleb Hammer

Yeah. A nice large butt is good, but usually it's attached to just like when it isn't just all fat. And it isn't getting like, I don't know what it's described as, but when it's like, first of all, there's stretch marks.

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362.233 - 371.207 Veronica

I don't want to go all this. I mean, somebody who looks like you really shouldn't have this much like particularities into who you're attracted to.

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371.307 - 387.994 Caleb Hammer

In terms of who I'm attracted to, I don't think who you're attracted to comes from what you look like. It does. People just have attraction. I like just conventionally attractive people. No, why would I lower my standards? It's so boring. Listen, I don't care what someone says. I mean, you are a basic white boy, so I guess. Sure. Yes. Okay. Very good.

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388.014 - 406.924 Caleb Hammer

Listen, it's, it's, I'm not trying to, the entire intent, I wasn't going to call you ugly or anything like that necessarily. But the thing is, you're like thinking you can make 10,000 hours a month doing what Amara is doing with her giant fart. It's because I'm. Shut the fuck up for a second. I'm bossy. And you saying, no one gives a fuck. And you saying. I beg to differ.

406.904 - 411.895 Caleb Hammer

Okay, well, yeah, you're keeping your accounting job. So clearly it's not working for you, is it?

411.915 - 413.258 Unknown

Well, I just started.

413.719 - 421.657 Caleb Hammer

Uh-huh. Yeah. Not working very well, leaving your guy for that pathetic bitch. So the thing is, I wouldn't have talked about your wife.

421.677 - 433.258 Veronica

I was so invigorated by leaving him because he was a piece of shit. Yeah? Yeah. Oh, yeah. He's the reason I'm in so much s*** yet. Why? Why? Because he wasn't a partner.

Chapter 4: How does the conversation address personal accountability?

489.151 - 492.396 Caleb Hammer

Six months ago, you weren't making that much? Uh-uh. What were you making?

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492.936 - 493.878 Veronica

It was like an 8% raise.

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494.138 - 501.249 Caleb Hammer

Go f*** yourself. You could have had somewhere to live. You're just a f***ing no accountability. And I can use this literally, whore.

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501.269 - 505.575 Veronica

Well, yeah, you know, f***. Well, actually, no, I'm not a whore because I don't get paid.

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506.096 - 509.735 Caleb Hammer

Oh, great career decision. That's going to get you somewhere.

509.915 - 521.276 Veronica

Well, I mean, you got to practice. I'm like, I've been out of the dating game for so long that like, you know, I got to like go around and find out like trying to find like my niche, you know? I thought you did. My niche.

522.598 - 523.159 Caleb Hammer

Yes.

524.54 - 555.968 Veronica

Black men. No. Racist. I mean, there are BBC. There is a lot into BBC. There's a lot of like white guys. Why are you not into black guys? That's not what I said. I said there's a lot of white guys who are into and like watching me be dominated by a BBC. It's so specific. Like several guys have asked me. Ugh. Oh, or these boys who want to be called baby boys then want to call me mommy.

556.789 - 563.616 Caleb Hammer

Oh, what the f*** is wrong with this world? Guys, just go get yourself just a f***.

Chapter 5: What are the consequences of not filing taxes?

2772.119 - 2776.065 Caleb Hammer

You haven't even gone through TurboTax without filing just to see what you do?

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2776.726 - 2781.216 Caleb Hammer

So what's the plan? Just... Kick the can on their own. That's it. That's the entire strategy.

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2781.917 - 2786.143 Veronica

Like, hope that I have enough money by next year filing. Hope.

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2786.464 - 2801.107 Caleb Hammer

If you actually start making your money from the show, you're going to have to do quarterly estimated payments as a contractor, as an independent business. Yeah, 1099 stuff. Yes, and you're going to have to pay all the taxes. There's no employer to take care of your portion of the payroll taxes.

2801.448 - 2801.588

Mm-hmm.

2803.947 - 2823.622 Caleb Hammer

Summer is the perfect time to get your budget in shape. And now that Dollar Wise is officially the best budgeting app on the market, I'm giving you a special deal to download, but only for a limited time. When you sign up for Dollar Wise Annual, you'll get my four-course educational bundle as a special bonus. so you can get financially ripped while you track your money.

2824.083 - 2845.422 Caleb Hammer

And normally this would cost over $700 by the way. But when you claim your summer budget reset discount, you'll only pay $249 for a full year of budgeting and a lifetime access to my four best-selling courses. Oh, and you'll also get a free copy of my budget-friendly cookbook PDF to download. So you can also get your body in shape too.

2845.963 - 2863.956 Caleb Hammer

Don't wait until your first vacation to try to get your finances together. Go to dollarwise.com or click that link in the description below. That's kind of stupid, I'll be honest. But what's not is actually getting a checking account that gives you free money. Free money, we like free money.

Chapter 6: How can budgeting impact financial health?

2890.392 - 2892.074 Veronica

What? You can back file.

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2892.515 - 2893.877 Caleb Hammer

Okay, are you going to back file?

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2893.937 - 2896.401 Veronica

Yeah, next year. Okay, with a penalty?

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2896.942 - 2909.561 Caleb Hammer

Yeah. From what you already owe? That's my plan. Dude, you are so f***ed, man. Okay, and you think selling your farts is what's going to make up for this? That sounds really great. You are not Amranth.

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2909.581 - 2910.383 Unknown

I don't know who that is.

2910.903 - 2913.688 Caleb Hammer

The one who basically invented selling farts.

2914.269 - 2914.549 Unknown

Okay. Okay.

2917.988 - 2936.337 Caleb Hammer

You don't even study the industry you're trying to do. What do you think your financial score is? Zero to 10, zero being the worst, 10 being the best. Probably like a three. You want your Hammer financial score? Get it for free at calebhammer.com. Take the assessment, see where you stand in the world of money. It is free, just takes a few minutes and you get your own personalized score.

2936.677 - 2942.747 Caleb Hammer

So link below. And if you don't want to be like a guest who ends up on the show, joining the tens of thousands of other people in this community who are

Chapter 7: What are the implications of a high debt-to-income ratio?

2990.164 - 2990.585 Caleb Hammer

People love it.

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2992.207 - 2993.628 Veronica

I hate cooking, so we'll see.

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2993.869 - 3013.859 Caleb Hammer

Yes, I know that. I will see lots of going out to eat in here. I know for a fact. There's no way you didn't spend that much money and you didn't go out to eat a lot. 500 bucks. This is bullshit. It's a crazy one. 1,500. It's the white one? Miscellaneous bullshit. It's just anything else that you just do not need. It doesn't benefit life at all other than dopamine hits.

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3014.58 - 3030.885 Veronica

Yeah. Dopamine hits. So I recently stopped drinking caffeine because I found out that... No, you're literally drinking caffeine right over there. Well, I mean like coffee. That's... I was drinking like three cups of coffee a day. You're...

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3031.625 - 3035.653 Caleb Hammer

You are drinking caffeine. It doesn't matter the source. Does it have caffeine in it?

3035.673 - 3036.715 Veronica

Yes. It doesn't have sugar in it.

3036.735 - 3042.427 Caleb Hammer

Two of those is equivalent to about an eight ounce cup of coffee. You think sugar is caffeine?

3042.487 - 3048.499 Veronica

Do you think sugar is caffeine? No, I know sugar isn't caffeine.

3048.519 - 3056.708 Caleb Hammer

You just said... But I said there's caffeine in this. There's no sugar. You're... Okay, so you didn't stop drinking caffeine, but what was your point?

Chapter 8: Why is accountability crucial in financial discussions?

3075.043 - 3078.206 Veronica

That's why I'm going into... Girl, you already got enough, trust me.

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3079.227 - 3105.365 Caleb Hammer

That isn't doing anything. It was already there. You're fine. Buddy, you're going to be dead before this card payment is paid off. The car payment? Yeah, this card payment. Card. Southwest Rapid Rewards. $13,142.08. Minimum monthly payment $423. You're morbidly obese, almost at 40. You're not going to live to the 24 years this is going to take to pay off.

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3105.726 - 3113.685 Caleb Hammer

You're never going to get to the other side of it. Your life expectancy range is usually within the next decade or so.

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3113.965 - 3121.274 Veronica

I'm actually really healthy. No. No. I've done all of my blood work recently and it all came back normal. Okay. And I'm very healthy.

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3121.614 - 3123.156 Caleb Hammer

Okay. Will you stand on a scale right now?

3123.837 - 3127.942 Veronica

Fuck you. No. Then you can't tell me you're healthy. My blood work says otherwise.

3127.982 - 3129.524 Caleb Hammer

Okay. Will you do your blood pressure right now?

3129.925 - 3131.066 Veronica

My blood pressure? Yeah.

3131.086 - 3154.042 Caleb Hammer

Sure. Okay. Can we have it? Let's see. I mean, maybe you are. Maybe you've gotten lucky right now because obesity itself isn't the health concern, but it is the leading cause for many of the things that cause death. Heart disease, high blood pressure, heart attacks, diabetes, all that good stuff.

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