Firearms Radio Network (All Shows)
ZERT Coffee & Chaos 145 – One Hour, One Bag, and You’re Never Coming Home
15 Jan 2026
Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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Welcome back to the Zert Coffee and Chaos podcast. Like that? That's my announcer voice.
Wait.
The show where we talk about anything and everything relating to what it means to be a survivalist and a prepared individual in today's society. I'm your host, Chris Bartagon, ZP002. Back with me on the show, my co-host as usual, still the extraordinary gentleman who's part of a league, Jamie Franks. Jamie, welcome back to the show.
That Gentleman Extraordinaire thing came from years ago when I first started with Lantac, who I still work for, by the way. But we were gearing up for our first or second SHOT Show or something. I always like to tell people that when the company of Lantac only consisted of six people, I was one of the original six people. But we were going to SHOT Show either for the...
I think maybe for the second time. And so we were getting our business cards and all that stuff and pamphlets and everything ready for shot show. And, uh, I read like, they were like here, you know, here's this code. You can go here, just go on the website and do your, make your business cards. And you know, this code will just bill it to our account, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
And I'm like, well, what's my, I don't really have a title. Like what's my title.
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Chapter 2: What is the significance of the I.N.C.H. bag concept?
I'm going to hand somebody my business card. I don't really have a title. Am I, am I a salesman? Am I, uh, uh, testing and evaluation guy. Cause I, I did, I used to do that for them too. And, uh, and they were like, I was told make up whatever title you want. So anyway, my first land tech business card said, Jamie Franks, gentlemen, extraordinaire. Cause I didn't really have a real title.
Well, I've always wanted a business card that the title was liaison. I always wanted to be a liaison, but, you know, never, never came, never came about. Well, folks, listen, you know, now I've got a business card that says director of sales and marketing for kinetic development group. That's no secret. And you spoke about SHOT Show.
As of today, we are next week at this time, I will be in Las Vegas. And on this day next week, later in the day, we will be having our third show. third annual, fourth annual Zert meet and greet out there with all of the Zert members.
So for any of you that are listening to this and are going to be in Vegas on the day that I just referenced, I hope to see you at PT Gold's to have a couple of drinks, have a couple of stories, catch up and see some Zert members. If you're not going to be there, well, Hopefully we'll catch you at the next one or one that is in your area coming up soon for everyone listening.
Thank you so much for spending some of your time with us as usual. The show goes out on Thursdays, Spotify, Apple through the firearms radio network. So we appreciate you listening. as far as Zert news, uh, still dealing with a website issue, working on it. Now it goes back deeper from the close of, uh, Clark armory. So I do apologize. I'm trying to fix it all for, for all you guys.
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Chapter 3: How does the movie Greenland relate to real-world preparedness?
So, so orders can, can, can go through, but what it is allowing me to do is to catch up on orders that are on the backlog without getting more stacked on top of it. So I'm looking at as a, uh, uh, a pro con type situation, but hopefully we'll have it done soon. It does not help that I've had to prepare for this show. And then it is currently show seizing within the firearms industry. And, uh,
It's a busy time. I'm packing bags. Now I'm not necessarily packing go bags or inch bags, but today we are going to have a conversation about a bag that we have talked about in the past. I like the name of this bag and I believe my co-host over here has named it that. but it relates to a movie.
Now, Jamie, you're going to have to, the bag and the conversation is relating to a movie that's coming out. You're going to have to remind me. It's been a minute since I saw Greenland, which it's so wild, right? You think about that movie and the title of that movie, it doesn't, I'm like, I'm not Greenland, but it was a good movie. I remember watching it.
Gerard Butler is the only person I can remember from the movie.
Yeah. And his wife is Deadpool's girlfriend.
Oh, Marina. Marina or Marina, something like that. She starts with a B. She was also in Gotham.
Hmm.
I don't think I ever watched that. But yeah. Hmm. OK. And so I think when we were talking earlier offline, you mentioned that the second movie comes out today or this week.
I believe the sequel comes out this week. And so I went back because it's been I watched Greenland when it was brand new and I haven't watched it since then. So with the second one coming out. The second one looked like it is something that I would like to see. So I felt like I needed to go back and watch the original one again to kind of bone up on it and refresh on the plot of Greenland.
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Chapter 4: What essential items should be included in an I.N.C.H. bag?
We've talked about a bug out bag. We've talked about the 72 hour bag. The thing we're talking about today, like I didn't coin this term. I got this from our mutual friend, Peter Palma. But he was the first person I ever heard this term from. But it was inch. I NCH. I'm never coming home. But. within the framework as it's presented in this movie, this one is kind of a unique or different spin.
And I'd, It's something we've never talked about, at least not in this way, but I don't think it's completely unrealistic either. I do think there are some real-world examples where this type of bag and this type of situation are congruent.
And let's go back. I want to kind of clarify that, right? Because as we're talking about bags, I think everybody's mind immediately goes to duffel bag, backpack, backpack. something you're carrying on me.
And if you think about that, an inch bag or an I'm never coming home bag, you've got to think that everything that's in your house that you want to take, because you're never going to see it again. I don't know that that's a bag, but it could, excuse me. It could be something larger than a bag.
Now that's why I liked this because in the movie they do specify they, because they Gerard Butler is a structural engineer and an architect that builds big buildings. Right. And the whole premise of the movie is that there's this big asteroid. It's going to crash into the earth and it's going to be like an extinction level event. That's going to kill 90% of the life on earth.
And so the U S government has identified the,
people based on their uh skill sets and professions and and areas of expertise that these people are the people that we want to put in this bunker uh to survive so that we can rebuild civilization after this thing happens and now i have to ask because i like i said i don't remember the movie i don't remember did it end with the uh the extinction level event happening
Yes.
So this is, well, this is weird because it's like they're making a Titanic part two, right? Like I don't, I don't really, I'm confused. So maybe this is just that 10% that, that, that made it and it's their story afterwards. So yeah, you know, I mean, it's tough to make a Titanic part two and spoiler alert. If you, I don't know if you guys have seen Titanic, the movie, but the ship sinks.
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Chapter 5: What are the differences between packing for a bunker versus the wilderness?
What are they already going to have there? And then other than those basic survival needs that are probably going to be met by whatever's already prepared in the shelter, what's the other stuff I'm going to be glad that I brought?
Just a quick example, I have a whole list here, but a Leatherman multi-tool, that's going to be something I'm going to be glad that I brought because that's going to be something that I probably use every day that maybe everybody didn't bring or a pair of EMT shears, you know, so I have a pair of scissors or, you know, like just things like that.
So that's, that's where I thought this was an interesting little spin on, uh, cause you're being evacuated to a place that's probably going to have your basic survival needs sorted out. So, right.
So then let's, let's focus on that for a second. Right. So obviously this is a unique situation where the, uh, and we can look at two, we can kind of gloss over both different scenarios. And remember folks, this is not a, we're telling you what you're going to do. This is, we want you to think about what this situation looks like and you should look at different situations. Okay.
So first situation are trusted and amazingly helpful government, uh, sends us all a memo and says, we've got 36 hours before the world becomes a barren wasteland. You've got this amount of time to pack and come to said location. Great. Then we can kind of go off of what Jamie's saying, like there's going to be food. They've got some kind of stockpile ready to go. The second scenario should be,
A catastrophic event takes place. You have no warning. You just know that your house has now no longer become an option for sustainable living and you need to leave and never come back.
Well, the real-world examples that I thought of that are kind of like this are like Hurricane Katrina, where they were evacuating everybody to the Superdome. You do have a fixed amount of time because the water is rising. Right. Some government dude on the phone didn't tell you you have an hour, but the water is rising at a rate where an hour from now your house is going to be underwater.
You need to take stuff and go to the Superdome, but also they can't let you into the Superdome with a U-Haul truck full of all your stuff. There's only a limited amount of space. There's a ton of people. There's a limited amount of time. You can only pretty much bring in what you can carry. Again, another example is the
debauched pull out of Afghanistan where the US government did notify certain people like, hey, we're leaving this country right meow and we've chosen you to come so get your shit together and let's go right now. And in that situation, again, you're never coming back to your home.
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Chapter 6: How does decision-making change under pressure during an evacuation?
I think that's a smart move, but you know, we've talked about in the past that
dual use items and i think you've got to focus on some of that stuff but yeah let's get into it man so yeah so that was that's that's the second thing on my list is a layered system of clothing and like the the example i wrote down is like uh
Bruce Willis in the sixth sense, like all the way through that movie, you see him, he's always wearing the same clothes, but it's a different configuration of the same outfit. So like, think about that. Think of Bruce Willis in the sixth sense.
You know, you have your underwear, you have your base layer, you have a mid layer, a soft shell layer, and then a hard shell layer, but you can have all of that on.
And so it's so now so that's taking up no space in your bag if they tell you because it does get to a point in the Greenland movie where they get to the military base where they're being evacuated from and they actually hand them a bag and say, OK, you brought this giant suitcase. All you can take is what fits in this bag and they actually hand them a bag.
So if all your clothes are on, if you've if you've brought a well thought out system of like good clothing, then. you have taken up zero room in your little bag that they give you. And this is exactly what, like when I went to Peru, I went to Peru for three weeks and hiked around the Andes mountains in Peru. Um, and I basically just had one set of clothing.
I had one layered set of clothing that, that I could reconfigure for when it was hot and when it was cold and when it was raining and when it wasn't, and it was just one layered set of clothing. And then the, the sidebar to that, that I wrote down is they know pretty early on that they're going to Greenland, um,
And the chick from the movie, the Deadpool's girlfriend, that chick, she plays the wife in Greenland. She's wearing jeans and a tank top to go to Greenland. So that's a poor choice there. I just thought that was funny. You knew you were going to Greenland. You knew that. And you put on a tank top. Right. They probably thought it was green. Greenland is ice and Iceland is green.
If you did not know that.
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Chapter 7: What mistakes do people commonly make when preparing for emergencies?
Um, But in there, I always just keep some Tylenol, some Excedrin, some cold medicine, like that kind of stuff. And I think, again, I would assume once we get to this hardened, prepared bunker, they probably will have medical personnel and people. But I would still have that ready to go.
Just some Tylenol, some Excedrin, just some regular over-the-counter medications, and then obviously any prescriptions that you require. Although that becomes a thing in the movie that if you have any chronic condition, you immediately get crossed off the list. And then I've got glasses. There may not be a LensCrafters in the bunker. So if you wear prescription glasses, make sure you bring them.
And then also just this is always a good to have in any go bag, get home bag, bug out bag is iPro and EarPro. That's the next thing. takes up virtually no space and it's a good to have because I pro and ear pro.
And listen, if you're smart with your eye pro and ear pro, you, like Jamie said, you could start wearing that, right? You can go in there with that. And I mean, some of the electronic earring, hearing protection that's out there. I mean, uh, I, I,
I have what's called ghost strikes by a company called Sport Ear or Axle, and they don't look like hearing aids, but they make the more expensive version that look like old school hearing aids that go in your ear, and they provide that electronic ear pro. Now, what's the problem there? Well, just like lens crafters, you're not going to have CVS, so you can't get hearing aid batteries. Yeah.
Moving on? What do you got? So we have talked about this on this show before, how a lot of people, myself included, and I'm sure you included, we just... As a term of convenience, we talk about using the GPS on our phone. But when you're using... Waze or Google Maps or anything on your phone, it's really not GPS. It's your, your phone isn't actually connecting to GPS satellites.
Um, so even though like my phone would be part of my EDC, um, for my Greenland backpack, I said I would grab either a handheld GPS or, you know, my Garmin watch that actually has GPS on it. But I think that would be a good thing to have. Um, in transit to said to the bunker.
And once I got there, I think that would be a good thing to have as a, an actual GPS, not because your phone doesn't actually connect to GPS satellites. So handheld GPS or GPS watch. Uh, and then the next thing is what something you just talked about is, uh, your little power bank, uh,
and your charger cables for your phone or your earbuds or whatever like that, and then batteries in my EDC backpack and also in my flight bag that I have for work. If you go on... Amazon, you can find these things. They're called StoraCell. Yes. It's like S-T-O-R-E-A-C-E-L-L, StoraCell. And so I have those in all of my backpacks. It's just this little plastic thing that holds like six.
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Chapter 8: What role does communication play during crisis situations?
I understand what it's used for in a normal situation, especially in that SF guy that is needing it to barter to get out of country or whatever that is, right? Then it makes sense. But in that situation... I think more value is going to be in 500 rounds of 9mm versus a nice timepiece.
Well, my nice timepiece weighs quite a bit less and takes up less space than 500 rounds of 9mm that they're probably going to make me shit can anyway. But...
in the movie in the context of the movie there's a substantial like the middle part of the movie as they get separated from each other and they're trying to like beg and borrow like rides from people to get to this other place so that they can get to this other place and a nice watch is a good tool for that and again that's there there is historical context for that like you said of guys trading their watch you know for evacuation which is exactly what we're talking about here like
if there's a guy that's got a truck and there's only so much room on the truck, you know, how can you, how can you make sure you get a spot on the truck and that, that maybe that could be it. But also just because I'm me, I'm, I'm probably going to have a pretty nice watch on my wrist like I do right now. And I might be able to use that. Uh, but I would make it an automatic watch.
So it'll never need a battery. And I would make it one of my more expensive watches. So because of its trade value and then like a good, uh, durable tool watch, it's not going to get broken.
Yeah.
With that, I said any other valuables, cash is probably not going to do you any good. But if you do have any of those little silver bars or gold bars or gold jewelry that's actual real pure gold, those are things that, again, it's not going to take up a ton of space in the backpack, assuming that you don't have a truckload of them.
Right. But caveat to that, cash is going to be more worth than plastic. Right. Credit cards are.
Oh yeah.
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