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Huberman Lab

Essentials: Science of Building Strong Social Bonds with Family, Friends & Romantic Partners

20 Nov 2025

Transcription

Full Episode

0.031 - 22.824 Andrew Huberman

Welcome to Huberman Lab Essentials, where we revisit past episodes for the most potent and actionable science-based tools for mental health, physical health, and performance. I'm Andrew Huberman, and I'm a professor of neurobiology and ophthalmology at Stanford School of Medicine. Today's episode is about the biology, psychology, and practices of social bonding.

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23.385 - 42.596 Andrew Huberman

From the day we are born until the day we die, the quality of our social bonds dictates much of our quality of life. It should therefore be no surprise that our brain and indeed much of our entire nervous system is wired for social bonds. Today, we are going to talk about those brain and nervous system circuitries.

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43.076 - 63.682 Andrew Huberman

We are also going to talk about the neurochemicals and hormones that underlie their function. And we are going to touch on a number of important and actionable tools that you can apply in everyday life. And I'm confident that you will come away from today's episode with tremendous knowledge about how you function. For instance, if you're an introvert or an extrovert, why is that?

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63.722 - 76.562 Andrew Huberman

Turns out there may be a neurochemical basis for that. Believe it or not, there's biology around that now, and it's excellent peer reviewed work. Now, an important feature of biology generally, but in particular, as it relates to social bonding is that

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77.065 - 94.721 Andrew Huberman

the neural circuits, meaning the brain areas and neurons and the hormones, things like oxytocin, which we'll talk about today, and the other chemicals in the brain and body that are responsible for the process we call social bonding are not unique to particular social bonds. They are generic.

95.221 - 112.531 Andrew Huberman

What I mean by that is that the same brain circuits that are responsible for establishing a bond between parent and child are actually repurposed in romantic relationships. Before we talk about social bonding, I want to talk about its mirror image, which is lack of social bonding or social isolation.

112.992 - 136.138 Andrew Huberman

Well, many people like time alone, but when we talk about social isolation, what we're referring to is when animals or humans are restricted from having the social contacts that they would prefer to have. And to just briefly touch on the major takeaways from this literature, which spans back a hundred years or more, Being socially isolated is stressful.

136.799 - 159.08 Andrew Huberman

And one of the hallmark features of social isolation is chronically elevated stress hormones, like adrenaline, also called epinephrine, like cortisol, a stress hormone that at healthy levels is good for combating inflammation, helps us have energy early in the day, focus throughout the day. But if cortisol is elevated for too long, which is the consequence of social isolation.

159.401 - 177.053 Andrew Huberman

The immune system suffers and other chemicals start to be released in the brain and body that are designed to motivate the organism, animal or human, to seek out social bonds. So if you're somebody who's socially isolated and is craving social contact, that is a healthy craving. And as we'll learn next,

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