Judge John Hodgman

My Own Avocado Creation

24 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse are clearing the docket! They talk about how to pronounce the word "crayon," smart home assistants, naming a child aft...

Send Podcasts, Lobster Roll

17 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers to clear that docket! Does a 90s Subaru Impreza look like Christian Slater? Can an adult co...

Logging a Case in A-pellet Court

10 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Luke files suit against his wife, Alaina. They live in an old, converted schoolhouse in Vermont and heat their home using a wood stove. Luke loves the...

The Crumble One

03 Mar 2021

Contributed by Lukas

It's our final wintertime rollicking docket clearing episode! Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse bid a farewell for now to Joel Mann the Mole Man, and hi...

The J Squad and Lil Monte

24 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

It's Extra Bailiff Day with Summertime Fun Time Bailiff Monte Belmonte! In the winter! Monte joins Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse in chambers to disc...

There's No Southwest in Space

17 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

The docket is full of cases and there is only one justice team to clear it! Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse discuss what counts as dating, duets, gran...

The Maine of Breakfast Cereals

10 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We are continuing to clear the docket! Disputes about how to pronounce "vegan" and "drawer," when to clear the snow from the sidewalk, scheduling a Ro...

My Wife Likes it With Peaches

03 Feb 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Judge Hodgman's chambers have been too rollicking! This episode, we are committed to less rollicking and more justice! We discuss kids' poop talk, aba...

Forensic Mom and Unnamed Creepout Boy

27 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

The rollicking times continue in the Court's Chambers as we clear the docket! The number of holes in a straw, homemade washcloths, Philadelphia sports...

Willy and Nilly

20 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

We are clearing the docket this week with Friend of the Court Josh Gondelman! Scraping food scraps, kingmaking, office supply stealing, and much more!...

You Can't Stop Justice

13 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

It's our 500th episode! Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse discuss skipping TV intros, accidentally finding jewelry, an appeal about distaste for fruit, ...

Maine's Holiday Boy

06 Jan 2021

Contributed by Lukas

Happy New Year! The rollicking times continue as we kick off the year with a docket clearing. Scattergories, dishwashing drain gunk, listening to podc...

A Rollicking Docket

30 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

It's the end of the year and we are clearing the docket! Fruit, fake accents, popcorn popping techniques, eating soup from the can, a clicky keyboard ...

Taking This Week Off!

23 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We are taking the week off! If you want to get into the holiday mood with some JUSTICE, we have a huge archive of holiday-related episodes for your en...

Grocery Store Quilts

16 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

There's more on the docket that needs to be cleared! Tucking in blankets whilst bedmaking, ice cream sandwich bread, Game of Thrones series finale tho...

A Gallon of Scallops

09 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse clear the docket! Pet parents, "cheersing," tonic water, and the answer to the age old question, "Is butt leg?" Plus a...

Jean's Heat Lamp Terrarium

02 Dec 2020

Contributed by Lukas

The winter solstice is approaching and it's getting cold! We have a docket full of holiday and wintery disputes to clear. Luckily, we have guest Jean ...

Cat-or-Dogical Imperative

25 Nov 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Alan files suit against his wife, Elaine. Alan thinks their cat, Muffin, needs a companion. He’d like to get another cat. Elaine, however, would pre...

Mr. Clicky Keys

18 Nov 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week, we're clearing the docket! Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse discuss eating leftovers for lunch, picking up baby items with one's toes, cast ...

The Gentleman Leaf Thief

11 Nov 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week we have Friends of the Court Chuck Bryant and Josh Clark in chambers to help clear the docket! They talk about distances, leaf collecting, c...

Die Flederhaus

04 Nov 2020

Contributed by Lukas

CONTENT WARNING: This episode contains an extremely brief mention of SARS and respiratory disease from 17:40-18:32.This week we are revisiting a court...

An Ampersand-Lopez Goof Party

28 Oct 2020

Contributed by Lukas

It's time to clear the docket! Songwriters Kristen Anderson-Lopez and Robert Lopez (FROZEN, COCO)  help with an important FROZEN 2 related dispute! T...

Mr. Commode's Wild Ride

21 Oct 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Lauren files suit against her mother, Cheri. When Cheri dies, she says she would like her ashes flushed down a toilet at Disney World, so her remains ...

The Doctorow Doctrine

14 Oct 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Cory Doctorow joins Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse as they clear the docket! They discuss splitting the internet bill, operating system updates, paja...

Brush with the Law

07 Oct 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Sheila files suit against her sister, Elyse. Sheila would like to paint the shed at their parents house. But Elyse doesn’t like the color scheme tha...

Tippecanoe and Zelda Too

30 Sep 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Time to clear the docket! Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse discuss buttered popcorn Jelly Bellys, kayaking with dogs, Bob Marley lyrics, Zelda, leaving...

Corn Husk Dolls and Pumpkinheads

23 Sep 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Time to clear the docket! Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse discuss card game etiquette, tea bags in the garbage disposal, taco night, hat problems, wak...

Fun With Words and Lexicographer Emily Brewster

16 Sep 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Lexicographer Emily Brewster is back to settle some word related disputes! Word origins, uses, pronunciations, and much more!Emily's the host of Merri...

Here's the Story

09 Sep 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are clearing the docket this week! They talk about pizza slices, coffee shop etiquette, asking about obviou...

Cobb Salad With Alan Ruck

02 Sep 2020

Contributed by Lukas

It's time to clear the docket! This week, Helen Zaltzman (The Allusionist, Veronica Mars Investigations) joins Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse to disc...

Contempt of Torte

26 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Matt files suit against his wife, Bryn. Bryn loves to bake cakes and Matt can't stop eating them. He would like her to bake fewer cakes or get them ou...

Neverlandmark Case

19 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Jessie files suit against her husband, Ryan. During a past relationship, Ryan’s ex-girlfriend made him a Peter Pan themed painting and he still has ...

The Shears Club

12 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week, Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn clear the docket! They talk about electric vehicle obsession, using scissors to cut food, roads ...

Animal Crossing Examination

05 Aug 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Kelly brings the case against her wife, Maureen. They both play the video game Animal Crossing: New Horizons. Kelly says that Maureen is adept at earn...

Birthday Parties to the Dispute

29 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Ann brings the case against her husband, Kevin. Ann says that Kevin is too judgmental about how she celebrates her birthday. He says that he doesn’t...

Vampirical Evidence

22 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Heather refuses to watch the final season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Bethany says that since they love the show, they should watch the final season ...

You Can't Acquit With Us

15 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Stephanie files suit against her younger sister Ashley. As kids, they both created clubs with their friends and excluded each other. Stephanie believe...

Office Supply Caper

08 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

It's time to clear the docket! Guest Host David Rees and Judge John Hodgman discuss chocolate choices, book burning, ice cream scooping, bread heels, ...

Trash Can Detective

01 Jul 2020

Contributed by Lukas

It's time to clear the docket! Guest Bailiff Tre'vell Anderson from FANTI joins the judge to discuss tickling, flatulence, dog walk conversation, stol...

Dance Dance Resolution

24 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

C.W. brings the case against his husband, Jeff. C.W. loves to dance and wishes that Jeff would dance with him once in a while. But Jeff doesn’t like...

The Best of Weird Dads

17 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week on the podcast, we are taking a trip down memory lane. That’s right, it’s a clip show! We thought it would be a great time to revisit so...

Judge of Sandwich, Massachusetts

10 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

It's time for Summertime Guest Bailiff Monte Belmonte! Monte joins Judge Hodgman to clear the docket. They talk about mayo and lettuce on hot sandwich...

The Sponge Leaver's Wife

03 Jun 2020

Contributed by Lukas

It's time again to clear the docket! Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn talk about pens, wearing shorts in the winter, leaving the sponge in t...

Live From SF Sketchfest 2020

27 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week's episode was recorded LIVE in San Francisco! First up is "Night Night Court." Noah is an early-to-bed, early-to-rise guy. His husband Kayde...

Trash Action Lawsuit

20 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Kelly brings the case against her husband, Andrew. Their next door neighbors tend to leave their garbage cans at the curb for a long time after the tr...

Right of Shirts Refusal

13 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Lana brings the case against her husband, Daniel. On their next family vacation, Lana wants her family of four to wear matching t-shirts. Daniel and t...

Licorice Adjacent Flavor

06 May 2020

Contributed by Lukas

KLAXON! The Judge John Hodgman podcast has been nominated for a Webby and we need your help to win! You can vote at bit.ly/JJHOWEBBY!VOTING ENDS TOMO...

Garbagemas Eve

29 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

KLAXON! The Judge John Hodgman podcast has been nominated for a Webby and we need your help to win! You can vote at bit.ly/JJHOWEBBY!Judge Hodgman and...

Live From the Murmrr Theatre in Brooklyn, NY

22 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week's episode was recorded LIVE in Brooklyn! First up is "Fragrant Abuse of the Law." Denise says that her husband, Jeremy, is a super-smeller. ...

Live From Boston, MA at the Wilbur Theatre

15 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week's episode was recorded LIVE at The Wilbur Theatre in Boston, MA! First case up is "Knit or Get Off the Pod." Kristen and Jess are two friend...

The Ballad of Silvia, Fernando, and the Cat

08 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers this week to clear the docket. They talk about putting on one's socks and shoes, speaking w...

The Hammer of Distraction

01 Apr 2020

Contributed by Lukas

It's time again to clear the docket! Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers to discuss cases about wearing headphones to sleep, Jo...

Good Old Onion Shop

25 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are clearing the docket! They talk about pizza as a snack, parents talking on the phone with their adult ki...

Live From Portland Maine at the State Theatre

18 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week's episode was recorded LIVE at the State Theatre in Portland, Maine. The first case up is "The Sole Truth and Nothing But the Truth, So Help...

Objection! Sustainable

11 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Hallie brings the case against her fiancé, Ramsey. Hallie is serious about conservation and living her life in an eco-friendly way. Ramsey admires wh...

A Zither Jam

04 Mar 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers this week with a special guest, Tre'vell Anderson of the smash hit Maximum Fun podcast FANT...

The Magic of Leap Year

26 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week, Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers to clear the docket! They talk about XO signoffs, movie arrival times, grocery s...

Live in Washington DC at the Lincoln Theatre

19 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week’s episode was recorded LIVE in Washington D.C. at the Lincoln Theatre. First up, “Emergency You In Court.” Sarah files suit against he...

Holiday Leftovers

12 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

We're in the depths of winter and need some cheer to get us through the post-holiday season. So this week, we're going to clear the docket, which is c...

Tattoos of Limitations

05 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Misty files suit against her husband, Scott. Scott started getting tattoos in his mid-30s and now has tattoos covering his upper arms. Scott has inten...

SerenDIPity

29 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week, Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers to clear the docket! They talk about heated cat beds, setting the table, morning...

Live From Atlanta 2019

22 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week's episode was recorded LIVE in Atlanta Georgia at the Variety Playhouse in 2019. First up, "Clothing Arguments." Brian files suit against hi...

German Engine Hearing

15 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Bethany files suit against her husband Jeff. They have an old minivan that will need to be replaced soon. Bethany wants to buy her dream car-- a vinta...

Edict of Worms

08 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week, Edict of Worms. Evan files suit against his wife Anne. Anne wants to get a vermicompost bin for their apartment. Evan claims the apartment ...

There is No Diner Jail

01 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

This week, Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers to clear the docket. We talk about winter holidays, slack emojis, Trichotilloman...

Live in Durham at the Carolina Theatre 2019

18 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week's episode was recorded LIVE in Durham, North Carolina at the Carolina Theatre in November of 2019. The first case is "Son of a Preacher Ban....

Reheat Offender

11 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week, Reheat Offender. Brandy files suit against her husband Shaun. Brandy believes leftovers should be consumed in a particular order. Shaun doe...

Tried Green Tomatoes

04 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week, Tried Green Tomatoes. Michael files suit against his friend and neighbor Sam. Michael is growing tomatoes on their shared rooftop and wants...

Daylight Savings Crime

27 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week, Daylight Savings Crime. Kari files suit against her husband Joshua. Kari and Joshua had solar panels installed on their house in July of 20...

Live from Toronto at the Danforth Music Hall 2019

20 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week's episode was recorded live in Toronto, Canada at the Danforth Music Hall! The first case is "Larpe Diem" Then, the judge and bailiff rule o...

Occam's Frasier

14 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Emily files suit against her friend Aaron. Emily and Aaron are regulars at a bar which they affectionately refer to as their "Cheers." Recently they t...

Right to Redress

06 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week: Right to Redress. Morgan files suit against her sister Sarah. Sarah is getting married in November and asked Morgan to be her maid of honor...

Traffic Stopper

30 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week, Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers to clear the docket. They talk about pedestrian right-of-way, traffic stoppers, ...

You've Got Bail!

23 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week: You've Got Bail! Lillie files suit against her husband, Thaddeus. Thaddeus has had the same email address – Apemanson@ – for 18 years. ...

Stick and Move and No New Butterfinger

16 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week, Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers to clear the docket with special guest Paula Poundstone! You've heard Paula as a...

The Skeleton Brief

09 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Kris files suit against his fiancee, Bonnie. Bonnie loves to decorate the home for the Fall season. Kris thinks she starts decorating too early in the...

Snickerdoodiligence

02 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Rachel files suit against her husband, Doug. Early in their marriage, she brought cookies to his family's Christmas Eve celebration. Doug and his brot...

Sluice Juice

25 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week, Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers to clear the docket! They talk about making the bed, using and washing towels, a...

Achoodication

18 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Luke files suit against Stephanie. Stephanie refuses to say "bless you" whenever anyone sneezes. Luke thinks it's a pleasant practice she should engag...

Dowager Mayor

11 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week on Judge John Hodgman, it's time to clear the docket! Judge Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse are in chambers to discuss new neighbor etiquette, pea...

This is the Sound of a Gamble

04 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Maria brings the case against her sister, Lesley. Lesley has been making bets with a friend about Maria's life events. Maria would like her to stop, b...

The Smoking Pun

28 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Content warning: This episode is almost entirely about cooking meat. If you find that subject to be unpleasant, you may want to hold out for next week...

Tough Talk With LeVar Burton

21 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

It's time to clear the docket! This week, LeVar Burton joins the Court to dispense some justice! They all discuss Star Trek: The Next Generation, dres...

Side Effects May Include Justice

14 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Yael brings the case against her boyfriend, Jeff. Is it ok to keep expired medication? Jeff says it’s fine, but Yael disagrees! Who's right? Who's w...

Coda Conduct

07 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Jeanne files suit against her sister, Liz. Jeanne says that when Liz plays music on the piano, she doesn’t play a song all the way through. Liz does...

Blob Justice

01 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

David files suit against his wife, Kayleigh. David would like to keep a jellyfish tank in their home, but Kayleigh is opposed! Who's right? Who's wron...

Aiding and A-petting

24 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Eric brings the case against his wife, Karla. Karla thinks that Eric should show more affection to their dog. But Eric says he does most of the dog ca...

Barbecuties

17 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers to clear that docket. They talk about barbecue, migraine triggers, controlling the thermost...

Niles and Dobbs

10 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

It's time again to clear the docket! Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn talk about Frasier, pill cases, being mean to robots, bike helmets, me...

Law Cucaracha

03 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Renee brings the case against her boyfriend Patrick. She thinks Patrick is too intense about insect prevention in their house. But Patrick thinks Rene...

Spirit World of the Law

26 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Jason brings the case against his wife, Annie. Annie's mom introduced their two kids to Annie's old Ouija Board. Annie thinks it's a silly game, but J...

Misappropriation of Funs

19 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Kenneth brings the case against his sister, Stephanie. Their parents give them money for their birthdays every year. Kenneth complains that Stephanie ...

Live From Los Angeles at the Regent Theater 2019

12 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week's episode was recorded LIVE in Los Angeles, CA at the Regent Theater! The first case is "Driving Miss Justice." Then, the judge and bailiff ...

Bitter Bean Juice

05 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

The docket is full! Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are in chambers to clear it. They talk about dog waste, day-old coffee, fancy chocolate...

Moms Are Gonna Mom

29 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn are back in chambers to clear the docket. They talk about gifts for in-laws, red baseball caps, group photo...

Open House Arrest

22 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Eric files suit against his fiancee, Elena. Elena has banned him from sharing online real estate listings with her. Eric would like the ban to be lift...

Gesundfight

15 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Becca brings the case against their wife Bridgett. Becca says that Bridgett has terrible sneezes, and would like her to tone it down. Bridgett says th...

Making Stock, Taking Stock

08 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn have some more cases on the docket to clear! This week they talk about feeding kitchen scraps to chickens, ...

Live From Los Angeles 2019

01 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

This week's episode was recorded live in Los Angeles, with musical guest Aimee Mann! The first case is "Family Freud." Then Aimee joins Judge Hodgman ...

And Baby Makes Plea

24 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Allison brings the case against her husband, Jeremy. They are trying to make room in their home to accommodate the baby they have on the way. But, the...