My Son Secretly Had £40,000 of Debt
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
This episode was made possible by Vanta. If you're building a business and you need to prove that you're compliant with security standards like GDPR or SOC 2, then Vanta can save you a lot of time and money. You can book a demo using the link in the description. They say our money habits are shaped by our parents, with many of them formed before we even turned seven years old. So I wanted to find out where my relationship with money came from. And to do that, today we're gonna sit down with the one person who's been there from the beginning.
So, Sue, I'm a big fan. I remember meeting you about a decade ago, probably a bit longer, as a wide-eyed, innocent university student with a ginormous afro, and I was just burning through my student loan. Good times, good times.
Don't forget your gold trainers that you were wearing.
Oh, gold is just something that I've always carried. I love a bit of gold. Yes, good memory. But for our audience, who are you? Please let them know.
How do our childhood experiences shape our relationship with money?
I am, first and foremost, Damien's mother, his PA, his general dog's body, and also his boss.
Yes.
Would you agree, Damien?
Yeah, I think so, yeah. Yeah, yeah. You know all the secrets.
I'm trying to get something out today. Yeah, yeah. But you raised Damien as a single parent.
I did.
How was money day to day when you were raising this little troublemaker?
Very tight, I have to be honest. Living months to months, paycheck to paycheck. Everything was paid for. That was my priority. The mortgage came first, the bills. You know, I wasn't getting red letters or anything like that. I just hadn't got any money left after I'd paid for everything. So I had to be quite creative, very strict with myself, very strict. And that's how it was for many, many years because I was so scared of just... not paying the mortgage, of losing my home. And I thought, I can't let that happen.
Yeah.
Because we were happy there, you know, so.
It was also a time when people were losing their homes because it was the early 90s. So this, you know, it was a time when interest rates were very high, double digit teens and people were, it was the biggest period of people losing their homes, I think, in modern British history.
Yeah. It was happening all around us. It was terrible. Negative equity, people losing their homes. I managed to get to the dizzy heights of 15% interest on my mortgage. Now, if that happened now, I think most of the country wouldn't be able to pay their mortgages. It would be an absolute catastrophe. But it was difficult then, although we had very small mortgages. in comparison to now so yeah it was a worry a big worry and it was it went on for a few years as well it wasn't just um one year it went on for a long time until Ray turned up yeah I mean yeah yeah I worked and that that's what I did um tried to advance my career as much as you can when you're looking after a child on your own and you've got commitments at home um so yeah i carried on and carried on until we got to the point where i could actually move um move to a better area move to a better school for damien and then i met ray was this up in birmingham
No, this is in Staffordshire where we are now.
We moved, yeah, because I got offered a very bad school. And where we were living at the time, I don't know if it was just a moment in time, but there was a lot of issues, a lot of gang issues.
Yeah, it was not good.
We were living in a part of Birmingham near somewhere called Aston, which had a lot of gang issues. And I think I got offered a school that was right in the middle of all that. And you were basically like, we're moving.
Oh, it was like an on-the-spot decision, you know. He, for some reason, we were outside the catchment area, even though we all lived on the same estate, it was one of those.
So all my friends could go to the good school, and I got offered the school where it was like, oh, God.
I just said, no, it's not happening. And I sold up, moved, and Damien got into a really nice school in a really nice area, and the rest, as they say, is history.
Out of curiosity, what job were you doing at that time?
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:00–0:53
2
How do our childhood experiences shape our relationship with money?
0:53–4:46
3
What were the challenges of raising a child as a single parent?
4:46–6:11
4
How did financial pressures impact your daily life?
6:11–10:57
5
What lessons did you learn from living paycheck to paycheck?
10:57–26:13
6
How did you manage to overcome significant debt?
26:13–37:10
7
What role did financial education play in your journey?
37:10–57:30
8
How can families open up conversations about money?
57:30–1:04:32