Chapter 1: What are the statistics on self-confidence and self-awareness?
Hey, I'm just going to hit you with three amazing stats that we're going to talk about deep in this conversation. 83% of people lack self-confidence. 92% of people think that they're self-aware, but they're actually not. 80% of your success is contingent on your social and emotional intelligence.
In this episode, my really good friend, Natalina Nasruddin, and I are going to talk through some strategies and you are going to learn from the best of the best. Natalina is simply the best. Buckle up and get ready. This is my good friend, Natalina Nasruddin. Natalina, how are you doing today, dear?
Thank you so much. I'm so good. Thank you.
Chapter 2: Why is emotional intelligence crucial for success?
And thank you for that intro. That was awesome. I appreciate you. Thank you.
No, no, no. I am the one that appreciates you. Natalina, you know, on the show, I like to ask people what's your because, that thing that's deeper than your why, your true passion, the reason you keep doing what you do. So Natalina, today, what's your because? Why are you doing all these amazing things that you do?
Honestly, Mick, I truly believe in elevating the human condition. I believe that that's why we were put on this planet. And in all of the experiences that I've had and jobs that I've had, I believe that the way to do that is to help people build the skills that help them elevate themselves and their potential.
And those are the soft skills, the skills that make up 80% of our success that most of us never really learn that are a game changer when it comes to not only your professional life, but your personal life. And that's deep rooted in me. I'm obsessed with helping people reach their potential. And this is how we do it.
I love it. And I want to go right there and unpack a lot of what you just talked about. So I know that there are people that are watching or listening right now that when you said that they raised their hand, they're like, that is me. And we know that Natalina is the guru of turning that self-doubt into powerful conviction and powerful self-mastery.
So for the person that raised their hand, Natalina, that's like, yep, she described me. What are some things that they can do? What are some of the skills that they need to start developing right now?
Well, I'll tell you this. So there's four major skills that we lead with here at our company, okay? And the first one is the most important, which is self-confidence. 83% of professionals, Mick, say their number one challenge is self-confidence. Like, think about that for a second, 83%.
So that means that only 17% of the workforce and the population actually believe in their ability and are willing to bet on themselves. And so if you're listening right now and you might have been in this position to think about the money, the opportunity, the things that you're leaving on the table because of a lack of self-confidence.
Now, I always say that it's not your fault because we've been taught our entire life to build what I call micro level confidence. And I talk about this in my book. I differentiate between micro and macro confidence. We've been taught to build micro level confidence, which is basically a confidence in skills, in things, in elements, right? So everybody is confident in something.
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Chapter 3: What is the difference between micro-confidence and true self-confidence?
So what's the difference between micro confidence and then true self-confidence?
So micro confidence is when you feel confident in a thing like a skill, a technical skill. Right. And everybody has that. So, Mick, what's one thing that you're like, I'm I know I'm good at this and I'm confident in it. What would you say that is? Just give me one.
Excel spreadsheets. I can do them like the back of my hand.
Okay. Excel spreadsheets. Now let's say one day that Excel and spreadsheets completely goes away and that skill and that program, that platform is gone. Okay. Now, that confidence is no longer there because that thing that you're confident in no longer exists, right? So you can't exercise it.
And so what happens is that people start to identify themselves by that level of confidence, but when it goes away or when it changes or when it shifts, they no longer feel confident.
And so what we really want to build is the macro confidence, which is the self-confidence, which is an inner belief that you believe you can learn, which is an inner belief that you are enough simply because you exist, which is an inner belief that failure is research to success and you have to have both in your life. And unfortunately, not enough people have built that self-confidence.
And so their belief about themselves constantly goes up and down. And it's contingent upon external validation and external things. And that's just not sustainable.
So if I'm again, if I'm listening, if I'm watching this. And again, not only in this head on, what's the one thing I can do right now to work on this confidence? Like if you said if you just did this one thing, I know that's very broad in general, but somebody is listening that I know needs to hear this right now.
Yes. So there's a tool that we use. And if you're okay with it, Mick, I want to share it. It's totally free. But I would say the first thing is go to risethefree.com and go to the free section and download the confidence quiz. Okay. Now, the reason why I say that is because there's nine elements of self-confidence.
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Chapter 4: How do healthy boundaries contribute to personal growth?
But whatever it is, you have to find what that belief is for you. It's a limiting belief. So identify the first B is the belief. What's the limiting belief? The second step to that is the backstory.
Chapter 5: What are the four major skills for personal and professional success?
Where did that belief come from? Because all of us are comprised of thousands and thousands of thousands of beliefs, and most of them don't even belong to us. They were projected onto us by other people. And then we thought we should take it on. And now we put the jacket on and we're like stuffing out of this jacket. It doesn't fit us.
And so that second B is what's the backstory, meaning where did that belief come from? Right. And being able to trace it back. The third B, which is my favorite, which is often overlooked, is what's the behavior that's being caused because of the belief? Because our beliefs dictate our behaviors, right? So is the behavior causing you to say yes to everything? And so you're constantly burnt out.
You don't have the capacity for your family. You don't even have the capacity for yourself. Is it creating... you to constantly be stressed, to be reactive all the time, to be aggressive because you don't have time to think, right? So like, what's the behavior? And then the last B is how do we break the belief to shift the behavior? And that last B, the breaking is it's not cookie cutter.
It depends on the person. This is where we coach them through how we can break it for them.
That was just a masterclass right there. Like, I'm going to bottle this up for you. Like, that is your masterclass. That is freaking amazing. You know, again, I've been a huge follower of you for a very long time. And I have my Natalina quote site posted on my monitors and on my boards and everything.
And one thing that I've heard you say a million times, no exaggeration, is that your career will only grow to the extent that you do. I would love for you to break that down for the viewers and listeners, like why the continuation of development and involvement is so important in your career and in your personal life.
Yeah, yeah. I mean, well, the reality is this. Every industry is inundated. Every industry, right? As an entrepreneur, there's a million people that do what you do that have a business that you have. In the workspace, there's a million people that are in your industry that do what you do.
And so the difference between those that are in the top 10% and those that are not in the top 10% is their ability to continue to pivot and exercise emotional intelligence in the process. Because your success, 80% of it is contingent upon your emotional and your social intelligence, not your technical skills. And so we got to keep growing because the world is constantly growing, right?
Industries are changing. Politics change what's happening. The economy is changing. And so if you're not changing and pivoting with society and with your environment, you're going to get left behind. But most people don't recognize and realize that emotional intelligence is the number one skill that's going to help you do that.
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Chapter 6: How can leaders identify and shift toxic workplace culture?
I'm going to give you some stats. Why is it that 92 percent of the population never achieve their goals, even though they have goals?
I just spoke on that today.
Right? Why is it that $1.2 trillion, not billion, trillion dollars is wasted every year in American businesses because of poor communication? Why is it that 95% of leaders think they're self-aware, but only 10% actually are? And so 78% of the workforce feels disengaged and not connected to their leaders. All of those things are...
equated to a lack of soft skills a lack of ability to communicate to build relationships to influence to empower and to create change and so if i were to ask somebody what their top challenges are right now in their life and their career I guarantee you most of it is going to have to do with people. Like at the core of it, it's going to be related to people.
It's not going to be, oh, I don't understand the algorithm or the technology and the coding. It's probably going to be, gosh, I am working every day to do my job right. And Bobby Jane over here isn't pulling her weight. And I'm frustrated because we're not getting the job done. And next week we have our meeting with our team leader.
And I'm scared to be in that meeting because we're not hitting our goals.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Can you tell we've heard these conversations before?
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Chapter 7: What strategies can leaders implement to improve team dynamics?
No, that's not true. And then another team member said, well, you're kind of intimidating. And I said, no, I don't think that's true. And then the third person said, you're intimidating. So then I said, okay, three people have told me I'm intimidating. I'm going to do an anonymous survey. I was the only executive that did it. Okay.
And out of 200 people, 75% said I was intimidating, not relatable. And I looked bad all the time. And I cried that night, Mick. My mom was like, what's wrong? I was mortified. But it was the best thing I did because you can't change what you don't know needs changing. And so even though that was like hurtful feedback and I would just like felt like I got punched in the throat.
I was happy that I understood what the challenge was. And now I was able to shift. And so I started doing things that made me more approachable, that made me more relatable. I was really intentional about the colors that I wore. I was intentional about not using my phone when I was walking down the hallways. There's things that I did to just create a better, more nurturing environment.
so that they did walk through my door. And the next year I did the assessment again, anonymously for myself. No other executive did it, but I'm like, whatever, I'm going to do it. And my scores increased dramatically.
So Natalina, we're going to give a quick masterclass for every leader out there. Because I tell people the number one thing that you can do as a leader. I don't care if you're a new leader or tenure leader is have a feedback loop assessment.
That's right.
Because here's the thing. We are so unaware and have so many blind spots that we never know that one moment. That it's the first or second time that someone is engaging with us and then their perception becomes their reality. And because they're working with other team members, now they're telling four or five other people, hey, every time Natalina comes out here, she's on her phone.
She doesn't even make eye contact. She doesn't care about us. How important is it? for leaders to have feedback loop assessments, 360 assessments or whatever on them, not the other way around. And more importantly, not even for your clients, because I'm not saying that client surveys aren't important. Yeah, they totally are.
But your internal feedback assessment in that survey is critically the most important survey you could ever have, because usually those are the people that are doing the actual nine to five work, but it's the actual job anyway.
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Chapter 8: How can investing in personal development unlock potential?
I'm able to see my team scores me pretty high when it comes to self-confidence, like being driven, motivation, being solution oriented, coaching. Like I have high scores. But the scores that aren't so high are empathy and active listening. So I'm like, oh, I got a seven on empathy and I got a seven on active listening and being present.
OK, well, I'm not going to spend time working on my self-confidence or working on like the mentorship piece because they already feel really good about it. I'm going to spend time working on developing the empathy muscle continuously. It's always been a challenge for me. So to continue to work on the empathy muscle and the active listening piece.
Absolutely. Not only I could talk to you forever, you know that. But I want to talk about now and give you the floor because right now, You have a book that is out, right? Recent, I want to say your newest, right? Let's talk about that one a little bit. And then I know in the winter, you have a second one coming out. But let's talk about the one that's releasing now.
Yes, thank you so much. So it's a part of our Empowering an Educational book series. So at The Company Rise Up For You, as I mentioned, there's the four major pillars that we focus on. Self-confidence, emotional intelligence, transformational leadership, and influential communication. These are the four skills that we believe every person and company should double down on.
So earlier this year, we released the self-confidence, the emotional intelligence book. It's an empowering educational book that has a ton of strategies. And we just released the transformational leadership book.
Now, the transformational leadership book is that next level of leadership that really dives into how do you move away from being a transactional leader to a leader that creates transformation in your team? Because so many leaders, I like to use Maslow's hierarchy as the analogy. So many leaders function at the bottom of Maslow's hierarchy.
At the bottom, which is just, do you feel safe and do you have resources, right? How many leaders do we know that just say, just checking in on you, do you feel good? Do you have everything you need? Is everything clear? Do you have the resources that you need to get the job done?
But what we really want to do is be a transformational leader where we take our team all the way to the top of the pyramid to self-actualization. which is more than just, do you feel safe? It's how can I help you reach your potential? How do I help you become the best that you can be so that one day you can take my spot? And most leaders aren't exercising that.
And so that book, Transformational Leadership is out. And then at the end of the year is the fourth pillar, which is influential communication. That book will be launching all about the ability to influence. Every day we are communicating with our body, with our words. But the question is, are you able to drive the receiver to take action and movement based off of your communication?
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